Conversation dynamic with mom - normal?

[Anonymous]

I'm 79 and hate to talk about myself. I just ask the "kids" how they're doing and listen. I generally deflect questions about me.

[Anonymous]

Same, but I think some of it is hearing loss. if she's doing all the talking she doesn't have to pretend to have understood things that she didn't really hear.

[Anonymous]

My mom is 72 and is exactly the same. I don’t think she’s asked me anything about myself since my children were born. As soon as I produced grandchildren, I was reduced by my own mother and my MIL to a source of information about or photos of the grandchildren and a sentient being who brings the children to them. Sometimes they ask my how my husband is doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m similar ages and my mom is deeply interested in my life and the grandkids’. Lots of questions about them. I think her life has gotten less interesting so she doesn’t have as much to say.

I wish she had more friends. I’ve wished that my whole life and swore I wouldn’t be like that. But here I am after Covid and my close friends have gone away mostly.

Same exact.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Same, but I think some of it is hearing loss. if she's doing all the talking she doesn't have to pretend to have understood things that she didn't really hear.

This is a great point - could be at play in my situation. Thank you for the insight.

[Anonymous]

My mom (mid 60s) never asks me questions, just monologues about her life. Which I don't mind at all until she gets frustrated with me that she "doesn't know anything about my life." Well gee, ask me a question and you will learn! I'm not one to monologue myself without prompts!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Same, but I think some of it is hearing loss. if she's doing all the talking she doesn't have to pretend to have understood things that she didn't really hear.

+1

My mom did get significantly less monologue-y once she got hearing aids.