What do you say when someone wants you to validate their behavior but they're wrong?

[Anonymous]

I have a friend who just got a "big job" and I am routinely shocked by things she complains about and how she talks to her staff. She moved from private to government and she is incredibly dismissive of her staff - I don't say that though. I just say "that sounds tough" or whatever.

I have another friend who is constantly complaining about work - she changes jobs every few years and is always lamenting that someone hates her, someone disrespected her, etc. I have never known someone with so much work drama. Of course she is the common denominator, but in 20 years of knowing here, I have never said..."hey, you might be the problem here."

It's not worth it - for me, friendship is a "safe space" where you can be accepted for who you are. We all have faults. I accept my friends as they are and validate their emotions as much as I can without being intellectually dishonest. They are not looking to me to correct their faults and flaws. (If they are coming to me for advice - that is different though).