If Your Spouse is Ugly / Funny Looking

[Anonymous]

A lot of women will happily enjoy a relationship/marriage with an unattractive man if he is wealthy, kind, amiable and fun. Since this is an exceptionally rare set of concurrent traits, women are inevitably disappointed after the initial wooing and good behavior. Even someone attractive will become ugly after years of anger and resentment. Someone initially ugly will become even more markedly unattractive. Sexual drive exists without partner perfection. You just no longer like him.

[Anonymous]

My ex was not ugly or funny looking but he was short. It didn't bother me at first because of his other qualities. Once those other qualities started to disappear (think: was ambitious and then became lazy), his height started to bother me more. Sounds like that's what's happening here.

[Anonymous]

This, above, is the weirdest post I have ever read. Toying with homeless is weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I used to date guys at all attractiveness levels, focusing solely on character. To give you a sense of my range, I’ve been asked to model multiple times, usually by small businesses. I dated stellar guys—the ones I’ve kept up with are in very successful marriages. That doesn’t mean that they would have been in a good marriage with *me*. Being attracted to someone is a necessary part of a good marriage because people are human and will let you down. Wanting to get dirty with them pulls you back together.

My spouse and I toyed with letting a homeless friend move in with us and decided to limit the offer to the short-term. It’s just impossible to keep those positive feelings about someone you’re sharing a space with unless they’re constantly walking on eggshells with each other or sleeping together. We don’t want either of those conditions to apply to the friendship, and our finances only let us help so much.

I’m very pro-marriage, and I think you should try, but I don’t have a lot of hope for you. From my experience, I needed to be thrilled about my partner’s character AND looks, but you didn’t seem to be thrilled about either. What’s left?

This. Getting dirty? Toying with homeless ?

[Anonymous]

Your looks may have caused some mental delays over time.

[Anonymous]

OP, is it possible that because your husband has some facial and body abnormalities that it has impacted his self-esteem? Does he have facial microsomia? It can be very off putting to many people and very subtle. Sometimes people don’t even realize they are staring when they are trying to figure out the asymmetry.

It can be a lot to bear.

[Anonymous]

Sometimes these conditions become more apparent with age.

[Anonymous]

It is odd to me that looks did not matter to you, until they did. I found them most dominant at the beginning.

But you have gotten good suggestions here; find a therapist you can be honest with. And see what you learn about what you want, at this stage of your life.

[Anonymous]

You signed up for it… You knew exactly what you were getting and not sold a bill of goods. Would you have bought an ugly or funny looking article of clothing? Probably not. Then why in the F did you marry him? JFC

[Anonymous]

Soon you'll be an aging woman with a special needs child, you think someone good looking would be there for you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes these conditions become more apparent with age.

Its called aging, happens to all not already dead.