What conversations in discussions do you have with your pets?

[Anonymous]

I talk to my pugs about how stinky and gross they are, but I love them anyway. I also talk about being patient for food and they're not the boss, they're not starving, and why do they shed so much.

[Anonymous]

I talk to my dog in Chinese. I don’t think he understands me. A white dog for sure.

[Anonymous]

I talk to birds and deer. I am always admonishes the birds for fighting, especially the hummingbirds. “Why can’t you just get along? Look, you can each have your own feeder. I put exactly the same food in each. Be nice!”

[Anonymous]

My greyhound is always trying to convince me that he’s too skinny since we can see his ribs. Also, he’s sick of me joking, “Hey, why the long face?”

[Anonymous]

I tell my dog about my most annoying coworkers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One of my dogs regularly lets me know that he’s practically wasting away, and that I should know that beagles are supposed to be fat. He also agrees with me that he is the handsome-est boy.

My other dog is a little spicier. She complains about the fact that her doggie brother gets any attention at all, and her response to being told her butt stinks is, “Go f_ck yourself.” She also agrees with me that she is SO pretty.

As a fellow beagle mom, I love this.

[Anonymous]

So many food insecure pups out there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So many food insecure pups out there.

Further evidence that we don't deserve dogs

[Anonymous]

Awww...
So cute. Makes me miss my pup.
He'd always talk to me using Sean Connery's voice.

Asking for food of course.

[Anonymous]

My puppy is 11 months old and on walks, wants to make best friends with EVERYBODY. I've noticed the people least likely to want to stop and say hi are women walking while on the phone. So last week I started explaining to the dog that they are on their hot girl walk. Then I pointed out she too, is on her OWN hot girl walk.

Also, I work from home and talk to her about emails and work gossip. She knows a lot of secrets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I talk to my dog in Chinese. I don’t think he understands me. A white dog for sure.

Don't give up hope. My childhood dog was trained in English, and then met my great-grandma who talked to her in Yiddish. She picked up commands in Yiddish very quickly.

[Anonymous]

I compliment my old dog on his dedication to sitting as close to me as possible all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I talk to my dog in Chinese. I don’t think he understands me. A white dog for sure.

Lol. I said, "Hi" to my neighbor's dog who ignored me. The guy apologized, "Sorry, he only knows Spanish." and proceeded to give him commands in Spanish which the dog 100% followed whilst 100% ignoring me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We talk to our cat and dog all the time.

Cat, mostly about how she’s such a cute little old lady kitty. She’s about to turn 18 and is a tiny cat. Seriously the tiniest, sweetest cat I’ve ever had. We also talk about her love for belly rubs. And about her insistence on walking across everyone’s pillows during the night. She’s a very vocal cat so our conversations can get a bit lengthy.

Dog, we talk to our old Shepherd about everything. DH realized he was talking to him a lot on walks after getting a strange look from someone. He was debating with our dog about stubbornness — did he really need to stand at the corner sniffing the same air for 5 minutes vs walking and getting exercise, because they’d both been sedentary that day and could really use exercise.

Out kid thinks we’re crazy. But he earns money walking neighborhood dogs and I know he does the same.

I’m your DH. Have long discussions with the big dog on walks. “It’s a walk not a smell…let’s keep going”. “Ooh good smells there, and I love how you put your nose right on it to fully appreciate the aroma of the pee grass.” “You need to be a friend if you want a friend. Growling at the othe dog is not being a friend. You will have no friends” “oh delicioso! Puddle water. Oh yes, nice refreshing drink. Does it taste like yummy pavement or bird poop?”

[Anonymous]

Hey what’s your name?
Ezekiel
Eff you Ezekiel!