Do I tell them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What on earth? Let me guess, you are the mom who held the kids hostage because you needed to hate him and now he doesn't have a relationship with him. No, he can tell them. Stop spying on them.

+1 op is still not over or still angry at her ex. Move on op

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, ffs move on with your own life. Dear god let it go. Your children are adults!

They still need their parents.

Nobody likes young second wives & their desire to replace first wife’s kids, sorry.

They are not kids, they are adults. They need to get over their dad's sex life and find some friends, SOs, hobbies etc.

Parenting doesn’t end the day a kid turns 18.

Yes it does. By the time they go to college, they need to take care of themselves, emotionally and physically. When they finish college, they need to be able to keep a job, take care of a house, and be financially responsible. You failed as a parent - mom of 2 adults. Maybe that's why your exH wants another shot at parenting, it seems that the first set is a disaster.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What on earth? Let me guess, you are the mom who held the kids hostage because you needed to hate him and now he doesn't have a relationship with him. No, he can tell them. Stop spying on them.

F off.

That’s ugly OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Which one of you is responsible for raising such needy children?

Why do you hate your children so much that you feel the need to create a second family to replace them? Are you going to disinherit your older kids?

Oh, so it's about money.

Well, if Dad has 3 more kids, that dilutes the pot for the 3 older kids.

There is no pot after divorce. The second wife, who is much younger, gets everything. I don't understand this hope that the older kids have about $$$.

[Anonymous]

Thank you to the one helpful commenter. You are right, he can tell them and they can deal. I have definitely moved on, just will always be a mama bear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Which one of you is responsible for raising such needy children?

Why do you hate your children so much that you feel the need to create a second family to replace them? Are you going to disinherit your older kids?

Oh, so it's about money.

Well, if Dad has 3 more kids, that dilutes the pot for the 3 older kids.

Having a second kid diluted the pot for the first kid and having a third kid diluted the pot for the second kid. Were you worried about it then?
Actually, when you had the first kid, were you mad that it diluted what you would be likely to inherit as a spouse?

[Anonymous]

Your kids & grandkids are going to be left to rot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, ffs move on with your own life. Dear god let it go. Your children are adults!

They still need their parents.

Nobody likes young second wives & their desire to replace first wife’s kids, sorry.

They are not kids, they are adults. They need to get over their dad's sex life and find some friends, SOs, hobbies etc.

Parenting doesn’t end the day a kid turns 18.

Yes it does. By the time they go to college, they need to take care of themselves, emotionally and physically. When they finish college, they need to be able to keep a job, take care of a house, and be financially responsible. You failed as a parent - mom of 2 adults. Maybe that's why your exH wants another shot at parenting, it seems that the first set is a disaster.

If parenting ends, then you don’t expect any contact from your adult children, correct? All obligation on either side ceases. You won’t see your grandchildren.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What on earth? Let me guess, you are the mom who held the kids hostage because you needed to hate him and now he doesn't have a relationship with him. No, he can tell them. Stop spying on them.

Lauren? Amy? Good morning!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, ffs move on with your own life. Dear god let it go. Your children are adults!

They still need their parents.

Nobody likes young second wives & their desire to replace first wife’s kids, sorry.

They are not kids, they are adults. They need to get over their dad's sex life and find some friends, SOs, hobbies etc.

Parenting doesn’t end the day a kid turns 18.

Yes it does. By the time they go to college, they need to take care of themselves, emotionally and physically. When they finish college, they need to be able to keep a job, take care of a house, and be financially responsible. You failed as a parent - mom of 2 adults. Maybe that's why your exH wants another shot at parenting, it seems that the first set is a disaster.

If parenting ends, then you don’t expect any contact from your adult children, correct? All obligation on either side ceases. You won’t see your grandchildren.

Bunny MacDougal has joined this discussion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Which one of you is responsible for raising such needy children?

Why do you hate your children so much that you feel the need to create a second family to replace them? Are you going to disinherit your older kids?

Some men really like the little kid phase of parenting. I don't think it's always about rejecting the first family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thank you to the one helpful commenter. You are right, he can tell them and they can deal. I have definitely moved on, just will always be a mama bear.

Thoughts and prayers for the future people your kids date/marry.

Land the copter, "mama bear."

[Anonymous]

The only way I would tell my kids would be if I thought they were going to be ambushed. My friend’s very young adult DD thought she was going out to dinner with her dad as their birthdays are days apart. Once at the restaurant, it turned out to be a wedding to the fiancée the DD thought was just a rebound girlfriend. And the dad and fiancée announced a pregnancy. My friend didn’t know, but if she had, she could have spared her daughter a shock and publicly having to act excited.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:AC's are aware of exDH's GF and his plan to have more kids with her, which presumably means getting married. Do I tell them he is shopping for an engagement ring? Don't ask me how I know, but I do. Or MMOB? One AC is taking this really hard, so not sure if me gently telling the news is better than him just dropping it like a bomb. What would you want to have happen? Thanks.

I’m so sorry OP—it’s horrible to know ahead of time when your kids are going to get upsetting news. I’d focus on being there for them. You sound like a good mom. Sorry for the mean posters—I’d feel the same way as you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AC's are aware of exDH's GF and his plan to have more kids with her, which presumably means getting married. Do I tell them he is shopping for an engagement ring? Don't ask me how I know, but I do. Or MMOB? One AC is taking this really hard, so not sure if me gently telling the news is better than him just dropping it like a bomb. What would you want to have happen? Thanks.

I’m so sorry OP—it’s horrible to know ahead of time when your kids are going to get upsetting news. I’d focus on being there for them. You sound like a good mom. Sorry for the mean posters—I’d feel the same way as you!

+1

It's salty 3rd wives club here. They should start their own thread about tips for changing geriatric husband diapers.