College freshman at home for 3 months

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is such a sad thread. So many posters who don’t seem to like their oldest child.

I still remember when I came from college and my mom said everything was always so much worse when I was around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's sad, it's just reality.

My DD is a tornado too! Fortunately she is graduating in a few weeks and has plans for a job and a roommate, so now only visits. She has mellowed a bit too but I was always glad to see how much energy she had and such strong opinions!! That said, she was always super draining!

+1 some of our kids need the space to grow up, mellow out, figure things out, expend and direct their energies elsewhere and with others. Has nothing to do with like or love. It’s knowing your kid and understanding what they need, the environments where they are likely to thrive - as opposed to being cooped up. That’s the way it is for mine anyway

[Anonymous]

I don’t think my dd has left her room since she has been home. She’s been agreeable when I’ve asked her to do chores, And she has agreed to leave her phone downstairs at night. so that’s progress I guess. Sadly she dropped out after one year and I’m sadder for me than her. I know that sounds awful.
She doesn’t start her camp job for another three weeks. Ugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Folks, please get ready do do your duty to deradicalize your kids from whatever they picked up from their new friends and unrestrained Internet at college.

Or, you know, learn from them because they are almost certainly right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think my dd has left her room since she has been home. She’s been agreeable when I’ve asked her to do chores, And she has agreed to leave her phone downstairs at night. so that’s progress I guess. Sadly she dropped out after one year and I’m sadder for me than her. I know that sounds awful.
She doesn’t start her camp job for another three weeks. Ugh.

I’m so sorry. What are her plans for the fall after the camp job wraps?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think my dd has left her room since she has been home. She’s been agreeable when I’ve asked her to do chores, And she has agreed to leave her phone downstairs at night. so that’s progress I guess. Sadly she dropped out after one year and I’m sadder for me than her. I know that sounds awful.
She doesn’t start her camp job for another three weeks. Ugh.

I’m so sorry. What are her plans for the fall after the camp job wraps?

You struggle with reading comprehension.

[Anonymous]

OP here with an update. So far it is going better than expected after that hiccup.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think my dd has left her room since she has been home. She’s been agreeable when I’ve asked her to do chores, And she has agreed to leave her phone downstairs at night. so that’s progress I guess. Sadly she dropped out after one year and I’m sadder for me than her. I know that sounds awful.
She doesn’t start her camp job for another three weeks. Ugh.

I’m so sorry. What are her plans for the fall after the camp job wraps?

You struggle with reading comprehension.

So answer the question. DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think my dd has left her room since she has been home. She’s been agreeable when I’ve asked her to do chores, And she has agreed to leave her phone downstairs at night. so that’s progress I guess. Sadly she dropped out after one year and I’m sadder for me than her. I know that sounds awful.
She doesn’t start her camp job for another three weeks. Ugh.

I’m so sorry. What are her plans for the fall after the camp job wraps?

You struggle with reading comprehension.

So answer the question. DP

The PP clearly said that her child had recently gotten home, presumably from college. Obviously she would go back to college in the fall.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think my dd has left her room since she has been home. She’s been agreeable when I’ve asked her to do chores, And she has agreed to leave her phone downstairs at night. so that’s progress I guess. Sadly she dropped out after one year and I’m sadder for me than her. I know that sounds awful.
She doesn’t start her camp job for another three weeks. Ugh.

I’m so sorry. What are her plans for the fall after the camp job wraps?

You struggle with reading comprehension.

So answer the question. DP

The PP clearly said that her child had recently gotten home, presumably from college. Obviously she would go back to college in the fall.

So what's this about then?

Sadly she dropped out after one year

[Anonymous]

me here, yes she dropped out after one year. And not sure what plan is for fall after workiing at summer camp. I told her if you go to MC you only have to work part time, but if you don't then you need to work full time.
I'd like her to do some kind of certificate program at MC, and not something that transfers to a 4 year. Maybe the ASL interpreter program. She seemed to be interested in that. She is a kid that needs more focus than a general psychology or history degree.
Back to topic, i think summer will get much better when she gets busy with camp job. She needs the vitamin d and social part

[Anonymous]

I dealt with kids being permanently home during COVID.

My AC are happy at home. I never had issues with them even before they left the house. It is an adjustment period but my home is a peaceful sanctuary. Kids and o generally agree on chores and rules. I do not have too many.

[Anonymous]

To the poster whose daughter dropped out, it is very positive that she wanted to have a routine with a summer job and you are doing well to hang back in suggestions to give her time to figure things out. The idea of doing something to equal a full a job is wise. However, also keep an eye out on whether she may benefit from getting any sort of counseling come fall. MC can offer her a variety of pathways so try not to limit. Your idea to gain a skill is correct, but also to take some classes for credit that might be a prerequisite for any field. She can in time also take advantage of talking to a counselor in the career certificate programs. She might see if some classes have internship experience built in. Or this could be a time to explore an area of interest through some countable hours in volunteer work. And she will also be building current references, too.

Since we have granddaughters as rising 9th graders making $12-15 sitting, this coukd also be a viable side line to give her cash. It will be important to help her continue to develop the daily independent living skills and to start to lay for some of the basics based upon her choices and income. I would always fund her education and any specific health related expenses, but budgeting is also important. Just remember, there is no timeline nor only one path to gaining a college or technical education and many experiences can build towards a career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
To the poster whose daughter dropped out, it is very positive that she wanted to have a routine with a summer job and you are doing well to hang back in suggestions to give her time to figure things out. The idea of doing something to equal a full a job is wise. However, also keep an eye out on whether she may benefit from getting any sort of counseling come fall. MC can offer her a variety of pathways so try not to limit. Your idea to gain a skill is correct, but also to take some classes for credit that might be a prerequisite for any field. She can in time also take advantage of talking to a counselor in the career certificate programs. She might see if some classes have internship experience built in. Or this could be a time to explore an area of interest through some countable hours in volunteer work. And she will also be building current references, too.

Since we have granddaughters as rising 9th graders making $12-15 sitting, this coukd also be a viable side line to give her cash. It will be important to help her continue to develop the daily independent living skills and to start to lay for some of the basics based upon her choices and income. I would always fund her education and any specific health related expenses, but budgeting is also important. Just remember, there is no timeline nor only one path to gaining a college or technical education and many experiences can build towards a career.

That's me, with the dropout daughter.
Sometimes DCUM does come up some with compassionate and helpful suggestions. So thank you! I will have her meet with a MC advisor. There are so many pathways.
I am hoping the working at camp will serve as her “therapy” for summer, and just being busy and out of the house with kids her age.

[Anonymous]

Can he take a community college class or something in one of those areas he loves to talk about? It might cause him to talk more, but it might also give him an outlet to talk elsewhere.