So are my evenings done?

[Anonymous]

We are here too, although 11 year old 6th grader. Really appreciate the moms of slightly older kids helping us see around the corner here. Thanks for popping in to give perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hindsight from a mom of adults, this is a short time of your life. I watched appropriate shows with my kids during this time, sometimes watched our own in our bedroom. Before you know it, they are heading out with friends as you are going to bed. Next they are out of the house and you have all your evenings to yourself...

+1

Enjoy it, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm struggling with this, too, since my middle schooler likes to hang out and talk late into the evenings. I know this is the best way to keep up the relationship, but it is draining not having waking hours to myself.

Yes. This. It's rough. But this is when they want to talk and in my experience one of the best times you get real stuff out of them.

I've really had to adjust my whole schedule and way of thinking. I have an elementary child too still but the middle school kid leaves very early in the morning. So I now get up earlier and see the middle school kid off and have more "me" time in the morning before my elementary kid even wakes up.

Also, middle school child is much busier generally so the time I have to myself is just different.

And to OP, pick some family shows to watch.

[Anonymous]

My children are 14, 18 and 20, and I still pause the TV sometimes when they come into the room. I prefer that to a TV in the bedroom, though.

[Anonymous]

My 10yo is in bed at 8/815. That’s when I’m done parenting. She reads until 9/915 then turns her light out. She had swim twice a week from 7-8 so on those nights it’s closer to 9.
You set the time she needs to be in bed or in her room and done for the night. If she wants to read, draw, write stories, let her do that. She can put her light out at 930.

[Anonymous]

I tell my 11 year old we’re off duty at 9. He goes to his room and reads or draws until he falls asleep.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know about others, but the late evenings is when my kids want the most 1:1 time and when we have the best conversations. They talk to more after 9pm than they do the entire day.

I have 3 and while they don’t need me to “put them to sleep” they each enjoy being read to nightly and some bedtime conversation. Oldest is 13 and youngest is 6. I even read to my 13 yr old. We read the classics together and she loves it. Not books she would chose to read herself.

[Anonymous]

We just put a latch on our bedroom door because our child (a) sometimes stays up later than us when we are "tired" and "need to go to bed early" and (b) does not knock.

[Anonymous]

Why can’t she just be in her room during that time? Why is your 10 year old bugging you? She’s old enough to entertain herself

[Anonymous]

We still watch our shows every evening with DH, from 8:30-10 or so. At that time our children are reading in their bedrooms, or in the case of our oldest (15) talking with friends or finishing schoolwork. we hang out with them earlier, since everyone is home from 5 or 6 pm everyday. They know we like our nightly tv time and honestly they like their “me “ time too.

[Anonymous]

Be a fam.

[Anonymous]

My kids have always had low sleep needs. They went to sleep somewhere between 9 and 10 and would wake up around 7 since they were toddlers. It's just how they were wired. Like everything with kids, you do what works until it doesn't. If you kid is naturally transitioning to more wakeful hours, try to figure out what you would like to do as a family that is relaxing for everyone. Maybe you don't get to keep on top of the latest Netflix series for the next couple of years, but you get to read books together. Maybe work on puzzles. Teach your kid to journal or have some art/craft time in the evenings. Within a couple of years, your kid will be going to bed later than you due to homework, sports, activities.

[Anonymous]

Grow a back bone. Bedtime is important to enforce. My kids had bedtimes in ES and MS. It doesn't matter what time they are tired.

[Anonymous]

Watch Abbott Elementary together. My 7th grade son and I have watched it together since the premiere. Great family show.

[Anonymous]

This is just when my kids want to talk, tell me about their day, their troubles, etc. Yes it’s annoying but I’ve mostly come to accept it. I do want to hear about everything and they aren’t in the mood right after school or at dinner for some reason.