In laws never come over to our house

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My in-laws live in a different city but have a condo in our town and they visit many times a year. They are always eager to host us and the kids at their condo but when we invite them over to our house for a meal they generally decline. They don’t give a reason. Or actually they will hem and haw about it and ultimately not come over. Is this weird? It makes me feel kind of bad—any thoughts about how not to feel bad about it? I also find it annoying because we sort of plan our weekend around the possibility they will join us for a meal. I think the right thing to do is just not plan around them but I find this hard to pull off in practice.

OP wrote town [not the widespread DMV] so if both houses are in Rockville for example this is unusual. What's the drive time between their house and yours? Time of meals? You have kids so has it always been like this? If there has been a change when did it happen? Maybe the only variable is the cat and not all pets, cats or dogs, are pleasant for guests or even members of the same family. Goes beyond allergies. Sometimes a "furbaby" makes people wonder why? Some people have pets that are generally considered intolerable.

[Anonymous]

Read the room: whether it is because you have a cat that sheds fur and dander that irritates allergies and the cat wanders around your kitchen, or they don’t like your food, or both, they don’t want to go to your house. Full stop. Who cares?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Read the room: whether it is because you have a cat that sheds fur and dander that irritates allergies and the cat wanders around your kitchen, or they don’t like your food, or both, they don’t want to go to your house. Full stop. Who cares?

Well obviously OP cares or she wouldn't post about it. It could be something about OPs house or it could be that the in-laws don't like driving at night or that they would have to get on the beltway which scares them or that they are getting senile or a million other reasons. The situation is odd indeed.

[Anonymous]

Stop planning your weekend around the possiblity your in-laws might come for dinner.

[Anonymous]

Is your house dirty or messy?
Maybe your or DH cooking isn't what they like?
Neither question above is mean to be snotty, just throwing those out there as possibilities.

[Anonymous]

I hated going to my sister's house because her two boys could break the sound barrier with just their normal voice! Also, she never offered anything to drink or eat and I mean even a glass of water!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Read the room: whether it is because you have a cat that sheds fur and dander that irritates allergies and the cat wanders around your kitchen, or they don’t like your food, or both, they don’t want to go to your house. Full stop. Who cares?

Well obviously OP cares or she wouldn't post about it. It could be something about OPs house or it could be that the in-laws don't like driving at night or that they would have to get on the beltway which scares them or that they are getting senile or a million other reasons. The situation is odd indeed.

It doesn’t matter why. An invitation is not a summons. They don’t have to go somewhere they don’t want to go. OP needs to respect that.