How to deal with "friends" critical of DD's college choice?

[Anonymous]

"Thank you for your suggestions, but we're all very happy with her selection." Lather, rinse, repeat until this friend gets it that the topic is closed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"It sounds like you don't understand Early Decision, Mary. When DD applied she committed to go if she was accepted. She got in and we're all thrilled."

This.

But also, your friend is a twatwaffle.

This is my new favorite word.

[Anonymous]

If she or he is really a friend, then I think you can just ask them nicely why they keep bringing it up. You can explain that it is your daughters choice and she is happy. It does not have to be a big confrontation just a gentle discussion. Why does your daughters choice bother your friend so much?
Your friend may just think your daughter could “do better” in her mind so it might not be coming from a bad place. She is just misguided (the friend, not the child).

[Anonymous]

The alternatives friend suggested are Towson or St. Mary's??

Interesting.

[Anonymous]

I know no one who would make comments like the ones being posted. Who do you people hang out with? You

And these are your “friends?”

[Anonymous]

Just say "oh, she's set on it. We aren't looking for alternatives" anytime it comes up. Don't defend or explain. Just say "nope, not interested in any others, this is it" BIG SMILE that gets smaller each time you say it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The alternatives friend suggested are Towson or St. Mary's??

Interesting.

I would bet friend is one of those people who thinks a regional public is always a better choice than a not-highly-selective private. You hear from them on DCUM regularly. They don't understand that the cost is often similar and the private may offer things the student wants that the regional public does not offer.

I'm sure I know people who have thought but not said that we are making a mistake in letting DD choose a LAC they haven't heard of over UMW, the VA school that would be her best in-state match. They don't get that the price difference is minimal and the LAC offers a depth and unique resources in the subject she's interested in plus offers an EC important to her that UMW doesn't have. And, even if they were equal in academics and ECs, she just likes the community/vibe/size more (after a lot of research and multiple visits) and so why not choose that when finances are not a factor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The alternatives friend suggested are Towson or St. Mary's??

Interesting.

This part of the equation makes me think the friend is jealous that you have $$ to be able to go to non-state school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The alternatives friend suggested are Towson or St. Mary's??

Interesting.

This part of the equation makes me think the friend is jealous that you have $$ to be able to go to non-state school.

Or as PP said, friend is clueless about how private school merit aid works.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:what is WC?

Is it Wofford? Shhhh!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Thank you for your suggestions, but we're all very happy with her selection." Lather, rinse, repeat until this friend gets it that the topic is closed.

Yep! A couple of other posters also suggested good responses. You need one solid response that makes it clear that you are proud and the matter is settled. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

If your daughter is happy, the best response to your friend is "GFY".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:what is WC?

Is it Wofford? Shhhh!

I think they mean Washington College, but I don't know that I would assume any school based on what OP wrote

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:what is WC?

Probably a reference to Washington College in Maryland. About 1,350 undergraduate students enrolled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a very good friend who is critical of the university my DD was accepted to ED. We visited the school several times; researched it and thinks it will be a perfect for her. It's private and not inexpensive but she received a substantial merit scholarship and with college savings, will be able to cover the tuition. It is small; not popular with the DC crowd but is where she thinks she wants to go. How do I handle a good friend who keep offering alternatives like Towson or St. Mary's (which are completly fine schools) but not where my DD wants to go. I don't think I should have to defend my DD's choice but it's getting hard to continually just brush it off.

She applied ED and received a merit scholarship that will leave plenty of funds for graduate school.