Serving alcohol at teen party

[Anonymous]

We've never and would never. And my husband owns three bars.

[Anonymous]

I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

OP here. This was what we expected (even though the parents said they worry supervising). We didn’t expect them to supply alcohol (and it was a lot of alcohol too).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

This is it right here OP. This is the mindset. People look the other way. A lot of people.

Not picking on you PP because it's great you are honest. You weren't that upset or you would have put a stop to it.

I would be very uncomfortable with above scenario as you have no idea if a kid is going to get alcohol poisoning in your home or one of them is going to drive drunk or do something idiotic like wander off and pass out somewhere and there will be no one to get help. Do these scenarios occur with regularity? No. But they happen and the consequences are so awful and severe if it does happen. No thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

OP here. This was what we expected (even though the parents said they worry supervising). We didn’t expect them to supply alcohol (and it was a lot of alcohol too).

How can you allow your kids to attend these parties? You have a responsibility to your children to keep them safe. You are condoning their underage drinking by turning a blind eye. You think it is better that the kids supply their own alcohol rather than the parents? Don't you think this is equally as bad? You people disgust me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

This is it right here OP. This is the mindset. People look the other way. A lot of people.

Not picking on you PP because it's great you are honest. You weren't that upset or you would have put a stop to it.

I would be very uncomfortable with above scenario as you have no idea if a kid is going to get alcohol poisoning in your home or one of them is going to drive drunk or do something idiotic like wander off and pass out somewhere and there will be no one to get help. Do these scenarios occur with regularity? No. But they happen and the consequences are so awful and severe if it does happen. No thanks.

PP, Do you have kids ages 16 and above?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

See, the first one I don’t think there is any problem-teenagers are sneaky little idiots and you didn’t know. The second, though, suggests you didn’t read your son the riot act after the first episode enough. Also, yes, it’s likely kids will sometimes drink but the less drinking the better and there is no reason to make it easy for them.

[Anonymous]

Our kids are both in college, one still a teen and one 20, and we had kids over our house for parties, backpacks stayed upstairs, kids went downstairs. Sleepovers were for three or four good friends, not a mass group.

There was no alcohol at our house (we don't drink). We don't have it in the house now, didn't have it in the house then, and the kids didn't sneak it in because we didn't allow them to. It's called parenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

This is it right here OP. This is the mindset. People look the other way. A lot of people.

Not picking on you PP because it's great you are honest. You weren't that upset or you would have put a stop to it.

I would be very uncomfortable with above scenario as you have no idea if a kid is going to get alcohol poisoning in your home or one of them is going to drive drunk or do something idiotic like wander off and pass out somewhere and there will be no one to get help. Do these scenarios occur with regularity? No. But they happen and the consequences are so awful and severe if it does happen. No thanks.

PP, Do you have kids ages 16 and above?

Yep, I do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

This is it right here OP. This is the mindset. People look the other way. A lot of people.

Not picking on you PP because it's great you are honest. You weren't that upset or you would have put a stop to it.

I would be very uncomfortable with above scenario as you have no idea if a kid is going to get alcohol poisoning in your home or one of them is going to drive drunk or do something idiotic like wander off and pass out somewhere and there will be no one to get help. Do these scenarios occur with regularity? No. But they happen and the consequences are so awful and severe if it does happen. No thanks.

PP, Do you have kids ages 16 and above?

Yep, I do.

PP again. And this is more of the same mindset. The drinking at my house is no big deal, they all do it. Only the lame parents stop this from happening. Their kids probably have no friends and are losers like they are. Eye roll.

[Anonymous]

It’s wrong. It’s an example of parents wanting to be the cool parents. I would let my kid had a drink at dinner if we were as a teen but not supply friends and not supply at parties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remember this is still very much a minority, but yes be aware that some parents do this. The liability is so extreme you have to be a complete idiot to consider it.

I have three teens, and it sure doesn't feel like a minority. I can name a minimum of a dozen parents for each of my three kids that are okay with underage drinking in their homes, or fine with their kid going to drinking parties. Like it's a joke. Makes me feel like I'm in the twilight zone.

This was already addressed that only 26% of the seniors in high school drink. Your teens are with the wrong crowds. That is the issue

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

See, the first one I don’t think there is any problem-teenagers are sneaky little idiots and you didn’t know. The second, though, suggests you didn’t read your son the riot act after the first episode enough. Also, yes, it’s likely kids will sometimes drink but the less drinking the better and there is no reason to make it easy for them.

Exactly. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Your kid "sneaks" it because you are turning a blind eye.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

See, the first one I don’t think there is any problem-teenagers are sneaky little idiots and you didn’t know. The second, though, suggests you didn’t read your son the riot act after the first episode enough. Also, yes, it’s likely kids will sometimes drink but the less drinking the better and there is no reason to make it easy for them.

Exactly. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Your kid "sneaks" it because you are turning a blind eye.

Not even the courtesy of trying to hide it. Throws it away in the trash. Real worried about what mom will do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't "host" a party but my son and some kids (10) came over to our home after a football game. The next day I found empty beer and truly cans. Of course, I was upset but he said they brought them.

After Halloween, a different group of friends came over to hang out. I stayed up until midnight but felt asleep. I supplied snacks, soda and water but again, the next day I found cans of beer and trulys in the trash. A few kids spent the night.

These are all seniors and according to my kid, everyone does it. If not my house, someone else's home!

This is it right here OP. This is the mindset. People look the other way. A lot of people.

Not picking on you PP because it's great you are honest. You weren't that upset or you would have put a stop to it.

I would be very uncomfortable with above scenario as you have no idea if a kid is going to get alcohol poisoning in your home or one of them is going to drive drunk or do something idiotic like wander off and pass out somewhere and there will be no one to get help. Do these scenarios occur with regularity? No. But they happen and the consequences are so awful and severe if it does happen. No thanks.

+1

That would happen in our house once, and never again because we would put the kibosh on it. When my kids had friends over, I was always in and out of the family room to get to the laundry so that I could keep tabs on things. I never went to bed until the friends had left. We stayed connected to our kids' friends' parents as well, to guard against dangerous stuff happening.

Were my kids perfect? Of course not. Did they drink? Probably somewhere, sometime. We didn't make it easy for them though, and we talked to them endlessly about the teenage brain and its effects on drinking, about drunk driving, about consent, about alcoholism in my family.

-Mom to adult kids ages 25 and 23