Did you take a gift for your DC's room mate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG parents these days are total weirdos.

How is this weird? Isn't this a board where parents pose questions/seek input? Perhaps say more about you for commenting than not being able to leave it alone.

It's WEIRD. Sorry. It just is.

So discussion forums are weird?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom never did this stuff, so I feel like I've got no sense of what makes sense. DC has been in a bit of touch via text, but that's the extent of it.

If you/your DC took a gift, appreciate any suggestions. I was thinking of a gift card to local coffee shop (no chains in town).

Do you know the roommate? Have you met him/her and/or had any conversation with him/her? I assume not.

I agree with people who say this is weird. Invite them to dinner if the roommate has moved into the dorm already, send extra brownies, but that's it. Those are offers of kindness & inclusion. Nothing like "here's a gift card" or "look, we brought you a candle!" Do you give gifts to total strangers?

I don't know why your DC would give a gift. That seems very odd to me. It's not the person's birthday (or is it?!). Your student would be showing up, and the other person would be like, "I have nothing for you." Awkward.

I don't know my DC's roommate's last name, major, or anything. I surely am not taking "a thing" for when we show up in the dorm!

[Anonymous]

No

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom never did this stuff, so I feel like I've got no sense of what makes sense. DC has been in a bit of touch via text, but that's the extent of it.

If you/your DC took a gift, appreciate any suggestions. I was thinking of a gift card to local coffee shop (no chains in town).

No. If DC wants, she can go out with roomate to explore the neighboring area and treat them to a coffee or burger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom never did this stuff, so I feel like I've got no sense of what makes sense. DC has been in a bit of touch via text, but that's the extent of it.

If you/your DC took a gift, appreciate any suggestions. I was thinking of a gift card to local coffee shop (no chains in town).

Do you know the roommate? Have you met him/her and/or had any conversation with him/her? I assume not.

I agree with people who say this is weird. Invite them to dinner if the roommate has moved into the dorm already, send extra brownies, but that's it. Those are offers of kindness & inclusion. Nothing like "here's a gift card" or "look, we brought you a candle!" Do you give gifts to total strangers?

I don't know why your DC would give a gift. That seems very odd to me. It's not the person's birthday (or is it?!). Your student would be showing up, and the other person would be like, "I have nothing for you." Awkward.

I don't know my DC's roommate's last name, major, or anything. I surely am not taking "a thing" for when we show up in the dorm!

For someone who thinks this is a bad idea, you sure have a lot of opinions about it.

[Anonymous]

I didn’t. One of my friends got matching signs with her dd’s name and the roommate’s name to hang up in the room. For about 30 seconds I wondered if I should do something like that but (i) my dd isn’t into that kind of stuff anyway and (ii) my dd and roommate were barely communicating. So no gift on our side. Turns out friend’s dd’s roommate was a horrible roommate and they split up mid first semester. My dd’s roommate did not become her bff but they were friendly and respect to each other all year. Still glad I did not send a gift. Dd knew to share any food gifts she received or any food she brought into room. Roommate did the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t. One of my friends got matching signs with her dd’s name and the roommate’s name to hang up in the room. For about 30 seconds I wondered if I should do something like that but (i) my dd isn’t into that kind of stuff anyway and (ii) my dd and roommate were barely communicating. So no gift on our side. Turns out friend’s dd’s roommate was a horrible roommate and they split up mid first semester. My dd’s roommate did not become her bff but they were friendly and respect to each other all year. Still glad I did not send a gift. Dd knew to share any food gifts she received or any food she brought into room. Roommate did the same.

To clarify: my dd and roommate were barely communicating before arriving on campus freshman year and meeting in person.

[Anonymous]

OP here: so didn't take gifts. Didn't meet one room mate or parents, who had dropped off their DC the week before. Met second room mate and parents, who brought extra snacks for the room mates and later called from grocery store, asking what our DC may want for beverages in the refrigerator they supplied. Have no idea about roomie #1 parents, but roomie #2 parents and DC would've probably thought a gift card was thoughtful.

Feeling fortunate that at least one kid and parents seem sane and nice.

[Anonymous]

no, absolutely not. guys. roommate assignment given just a couple weeks before move in. gift would have been extremely weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We often took other kids on my dd's Ivy crew team out to dinner + other parents took her. We did not give gifts until the graduation parties came around.

Can I just highlight the fact that you had to mention that it was not just a college crew team but “ivy”...yuck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We often took other kids on my dd's Ivy crew team out to dinner + other parents took her. We did not give gifts until the graduation parties came around.

Can I just highlight the fact that you had to mention that it was not just a college crew team but “ivy”...yuck.

So many parents on this forum get validation from this sort of thing. Just laugh to yourself and move on.

[Anonymous]

We bought them a matching room decor item.

[Anonymous]

Last year the mom of my DD's roomate gave each of the suitemates hand towels with the college logo and their name. We thought that was very nice and though my DD never used it (I think she didn't want to ruin it), she brought it back to school this year.