I want to feel beautiful again

[Anonymous]

Hang in there! You are in the weeds. I began to really feel myself again when my second was about 6 months old and dropped the last night feed.

What is your child care plan for the kids? Do you work and have them in daycare? Use some of the time they are in daycare to work out. Maybe drop them off at 7am, work out, then get on with your work day. Or else let your spouse do either drop off or pick up and use some of that time to squeeze in a workout.
Or, do you stay at home with your kids? It's important to find some time for yourself to work out or do whatever it is that will make you feel happy. You need to get a sitter, or ask your spouse to help. You can't plan everything around the baby's naps.
You don't need to smell. Shower at least once a day and use deodorant. Make sure you change breast pads regularly. When I was breastfeeding I had to shower twice a day because it felt like a messy business.