If your kid hit you would you ever hit him back?

[Anonymous]

White people problem.

[Anonymous]

What if a stranger’s ten-year-old hit you? What about a 12 yr old? 14? It’s a good question because we want our kids to fight back when necessary.

I stopped biting when I was a toddler when my mother bit me back.

[Anonymous]

She will hit hard back by quitting that day and never returning. She is done being assaulted on her job by a child that is old enough to know better.

[Anonymous]

People including kids need to learn there are consequences to hitting someone. You cannot just go around hitting people and think you're going to get away with it. You hit the wrong person and can end up dead. Not kidding! The sooner they learn this the better.

[Anonymous]

Sure. After the age of ten, unless they have developmental delays, they mess around and find out the hard way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She will hit hard back by quitting that day and never returning. She is done being assaulted on her job by a child that is old enough to know better.

Former nanny now family friend. She doesn’t work for them anymore. Kid brought it up as a hypothetical.

[Anonymous]

Another kid will hit back - why not an adult? I don’t let anyone hurt me including my kids. By ten I would smack him back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:White people problem.

Non-white kids don’t hit?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If yes, at what age?

My son is ten and was goofing around with his former nanny who is now a close family friend. My son said something about hitting her and she replied that she’d hit him back and hit him hard. My son was surprised but she said after ten, I hit back so keep that in mind. I doubt it’s ever going to happen (he isn’t a hitter and she loves him to bits) but it’s an interesting statement.

What a brat. He sounds like a bully. What is wrong with you that you didn't punish him right then and there, not by hitting, but by losing all privileges for a week and he would write an apology to her. Be prepared to visit him in prison.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:White people problem.

Non-white kids don’t hit?

No, non white kids will get slapped back from an early age if they try that with their parents / grandma.

I'm white and my mom would have hit me back, age 6 and after.

[Anonymous]

No I wouldn’t hit back. I’ve told my son that a more physically powerful person hitting a less powerful person is wrong. I don’t want him hitting a woman or a child some day. He has ADHD and the last time he took a swing at me he was a lot smaller than I am - now he’s a nearly 6 foot teen and has even said that no matter what he would never hit me because he knows he fluid hurt me and doesn’t want to do that.

[Anonymous]

No. If either of my boys (13 and 17) hit me, I'd take them for a neurological exam and drug test. It would be extremely out of character and concerning. But I can imagine joking that I would.

[Anonymous]

My husband and I and our 4-yr-old son were out for a walk one day. Son was behind us. We were chatting. Son slapped me on the butt for no reason. I reflexively turned and smacked him hard enough to knock him on his butt, sitting on the sidewalk looking stunned. My husband was shocked. I said, Anybody hits me, I hit them back.

Son is now 47 and he never hit me again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It isn't that I think your nanny is morally wrong, she isn't. But legally, you cannot hit your child. I'm guessing if we are talking a 10 yr old, if you "hit them back" it isn't going to be a the gentle swat on the bottom you'd give a 2 yr old- it would need to be a much harder more significant hit. Which is child abuse, like it or not.

Depends on where and how you hit . Punching a child in the face is abuse. Hitting child on butt with belt or paddle is not abuse. Of course only coming from the parents not a nanny.

[Anonymous]

Sounds to me like this was the perfect exchange - he hypothetically tossed out an idea and she spelled out strong consequences. If he’s smart, he’ll always bear that in mind. Better to have info beforehand and learn control than make the mistake and suffer natural consequences in the moment.