Friends 4 yo still wears a diaper all the time

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That was my nephew. It was pure laziness but he eventually potty trained at 4.5. They would change him openly in the living room and I found it SO gross.

My nephew's not 4 yet, but I fear this is where it's headed. He doesn't get changed in front of everyone however.
I think the reason he's not potty trained is that his parents are not on the same page. My sister tried training but when her husband takes care of the kid, he reverts back to diapers.

[Anonymous]

OP many parents don't know that there is a sweet spot at 2-2.5 to train then you get HARD resistance for years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post seems full of defensive people who had kids who trained really late.

Yes disabilities can cause issues, but the majority of the time I’ve found it’s bc the parents are undisciplined, kinda lazy (expect the child to figure it out on their own rather than put real effort into it), and are not able to push through their child’s resistance or challenges. I’m certainly not a perfect parent myself, but there is something a little disturbing about 4 year olds still pooping in a diaper

I have one kid (a girl) who didn't potty train until she was 4.5, and another kid (a boy) who trained at 2.5. Was that my parenting? The girl went on to be diagnosed with autism, but at the time, she had no diagnosis and we didn't know anything was wrong. I wonder if our friends were posting about us on dcum.

[Anonymous]

My 4yo son has a friend in preschool, also 4, who wears diapers. He’s very sweet and smart. It’s not common but I don’t think it’s completely strange. Lots of reason a kid that age could still be wearing them.

[Anonymous]

Your whole post is obnoxious. Leave them alone if you can’t be a sincere friend that doesn’t sit in judgement of something that will work itself in due time. Highly experienced parents know that you should never judge another parents’ trails and tribulations harshly because more than likely you will have similar issues at some point.

[Anonymous]

It’s lazy parents. Not an issue. My cousin was like that with their kid and it was so gross. I felt so bad for child to be in his own poo like that. So lazy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s lazy parents. Not an issue. My cousin was like that with their kid and it was so gross. I felt so bad for child to be in his own poo like that. So lazy

Do you know this child?

Oh…no, you don’t? You have no idea but you just want to yell into the abyss? Got it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post seems full of defensive people who had kids who trained really late.

Yes disabilities can cause issues, but the majority of the time I’ve found it’s bc the parents are undisciplined, kinda lazy (expect the child to figure it out on their own rather than put real effort into it), and are not able to push through their child’s resistance or challenges. I’m certainly not a perfect parent myself, but there is something a little disturbing about 4 year olds still pooping in a diaper

There’s something a lot disturbing about a grown adult woman being so easily disturbed by a normal developmental variation. Sadly, there is nothing developmental to explain it, though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP many parents don't know that there is a sweet spot at 2-2.5 to train then you get HARD resistance for years.

This is fake news.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP many parents don't know that there is a sweet spot at 2-2.5 to train then you get HARD resistance for years.

I don’t think this is true. I think this is something people believe because of the Oh Crap potty training book, but it’s hasn’t been true in my experience at all. Or in DD’s school’s experience, where they wait until kids are in the 3 year old classroom to potty train.

[Anonymous]

Some parents are too scared to start potty training and use modern open mindedness to justify delays. This is not good for the kid. I'm not sure there's anything you can do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This post seems full of defensive people who had kids who trained really late.

Yes disabilities can cause issues, but the majority of the time I’ve found it’s bc the parents are undisciplined, kinda lazy (expect the child to figure it out on their own rather than put real effort into it), and are not able to push through their child’s resistance or challenges. I’m certainly not a perfect parent myself, but there is something a little disturbing about 4 year olds still pooping in a diaper

There’s something a lot disturbing about a grown adult woman being so easily disturbed by a normal developmental variation. Sadly, there is nothing developmental to explain it, though.

She's right.

[Anonymous]

I knew a kid still in a diaper at 4. I used to babysit for him sometimes. His mom was a psychologist and felt strongly that she shouldn’t push him into potty training, it’s damaging etc etc…. I thought it was nuts. One day at about 4.5 he wanted a toy and she said if he went to the toilet he could have the toy…. Then she acted blown away when he did it . She literally said “ if only I’d have known it was that easy”….. I really think psychologists make the worst parents.

[Anonymous]

OP if this kid is in a preschool, they would have to be starting potty training. Most preschools require kids to be potty trained.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post seems full of defensive people who had kids who trained really late.

Yes disabilities can cause issues, but the majority of the time I’ve found it’s bc the parents are undisciplined, kinda lazy (expect the child to figure it out on their own rather than put real effort into it), and are not able to push through their child’s resistance or challenges. I’m certainly not a perfect parent myself, but there is something a little disturbing about 4 year olds still pooping in a diaper

NP. My daughters were trained at 2.5 and just shy of 3 years, thanks.

Anyway, I have this thing where I realize that a lot of people in this world have special needs and medical issues, and none of that is my business unless a parent wants to share a diagnosis with me.

There’s something a little different about grown adults in 2021 not realizing that special needs and disabilities are not always visible.