Bethesda Soccer On Way Down

[Anonymous]

I don’t believe this was his choice. He advocates for playing 7v7 longer and wasn’t supportive of playing up in EDP.

Where are the 2016 players switching to?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:No sure why BM gets such dislike from some of you. He coached my kid at U8 and was fine... I watched him coach his current team in close proximity to our practices and the coaching was decent. I watched some of his team's games and they performed pretty well - he was overly animated during some of the games, but nothing excessively crazy. Granted, I did not see every game and every practice. Off the field he seems like a decent guy, both with the girls and parents - my few conversations with him were very amicable.

Every time I read about a BSC coach I have no familiarity with and see a bunch of negative comments- I think, is this a bunch of DCUM BS or is this real info.

Anonymous wrote:No sure why BM gets such dislike from some of you. He coached my kid at U8 and was fine... I watched him coach his current team in close proximity to our practices and the coaching was decent. I watched some of his team's games and they performed pretty well - he was overly animated during some of the games, but nothing excessively crazy. Granted, I did not see every game and every practice. Off the field he seems like a decent guy, both with the girls and parents - my few conversations with him were very amicable.

Every time I read about a BSC coach I have no familiarity with and see a bunch of negative comments- I think, is this a bunch of DCUM BS or is this real info.

You want real info: BM just led our 2016’s into a wood chipper. 1 point, devastating losses, -21 goal differential. Finished behind another 2016 team also playing up. Huge setback for the girls in their progression, they were playing much better soccer skill wise last fall. Others parents on the team are on something if they think any of this was good for our girls. So many players crying this spring from this losses after what looked like a good start to the year. BM did not make any changes within game or game to game to make things more competitive. He just dialed it in this spring. No wonder we and several others are leaving BSC after this experience and will gladly let the door on this sinking ship hit me on the way out.

Just saw what you are talking about. Why would he think being in the same division with your 2015 top team and most of the top 2015 teams in the area would be helpful? Wood chipper is exactly what I would call that too. Both 2016 teams got buzz sawed. Poor girls. You can play up but keep realistic (I see your 2 team played up in Division 4 and did well). I hope your daughter recovers from that and has a great year next year.

I have zero insight into this specifically but knowing how some of these decisions have worked in the past, it may not have been his. But he may have been able to more strongly advocate to get out.

He told us it was his decision… So unless he was lying, he owns it.

Same.

Looks like that’s x 3

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t believe this was his choice. He advocates for playing 7v7 longer and wasn’t supportive of playing up in EDP.

Where are the 2016 players switching to?

Anywhere is better after these last 3.5 months. I just hope we can undo the damage this program caused that we were too slow to recognize and reluctant to see. Other parents might think this spring was fantastic for their kid, that the crushing defeat and tears were worth it, and it builds character. Sadly, there is not enough Kool-Aid for our family to feel the same so we are leaving.

And to keep asking where a player is going in this situation is like asking the same question as what is your daughter’s name, you dumbass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well he did put them in a boys league at U9 in the spring. And yes - as another poster commented, most of the competitive teams play up a year, and some in 2 leagues as well. Should they have been in the top bracket for this spring.... probably not.

That begs the question of development vs winning. I see some folks take one side or another, when IMO there really needs to be a balance.

No there doesn't. The kids will keep the score. The kids will naturally compete. The score needs to be forgotten once you leave the field.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well he did put them in a boys league at U9 in the spring. And yes - as another poster commented, most of the competitive teams play up a year, and some in 2 leagues as well. Should they have been in the top bracket for this spring.... probably not.

That begs the question of development vs winning. I see some folks take one side or another, when IMO there really needs to be a balance.

No there doesn't. The kids will keep the score. The kids will naturally compete. The score needs to be forgotten once you leave the field.

It’s hard for 10 year olds who had a lot of success up until March, to forget 0-3, 0-5, 0-8 scores on the walk back to the car and tears flowing down, and shrug it off. As much as you can ask them if they even remember scores from a year ago and reinforce the journey - that none of the scores matter, for some players it still matters and the succession week after week after week. Expecting all 10 year olds to shrug off those beat downs, kinda unrealistic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well he did put them in a boys league at U9 in the spring. And yes - as another poster commented, most of the competitive teams play up a year, and some in 2 leagues as well. Should they have been in the top bracket for this spring.... probably not.

That begs the question of development vs winning. I see some folks take one side or another, when IMO there really needs to be a balance.

No there doesn't. The kids will keep the score. The kids will naturally compete. The score needs to be forgotten once you leave the field.

It’s hard for 10 year olds who had a lot of success up until March, to forget 0-3, 0-5, 0-8 scores on the walk back to the car and tears flowing down, and shrug it off. As much as you can ask them if they even remember scores from a year ago and reinforce the journey - that none of the scores matter, for some players it still matters and the succession week after week after week. Expecting all 10 year olds to shrug off those beat downs, kinda unrealistic.

DP here, who starts most of my comments by pointing out that I am no fan of BSC. At all. But your child is 10. They didn’t have “success” earlier in the year, and they don’t have failure now. It’s all just opportunities to play at that age, truly. You really need to reinforce for your DD that wins and losses mean absolutely nothing at that age. If she hates losing? Great. She can hopefully channel that passion into on field performances down the road when wins and losses matter when she’s HS age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t believe this was his choice. He advocates for playing 7v7 longer and wasn’t supportive of playing up in EDP.

Where are the 2016 players switching to?

That's a great question. I wonder how many kids are actually leaving because of this experience?

[Anonymous]

I wrote this before and will repeat. The biggest issue isn’t the poor decisions of individual coaches, or the abuse of other coaches. The biggest issue with BSC is that NO ONE CARES. There is NO recourse when something goes wrong. You can’t contact the executive team, there is no working office number, the board members are friends of the executives. When something is really wrong, there is nowhere to turn. Cannot wait to get out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well he did put them in a boys league at U9 in the spring. And yes - as another poster commented, most of the competitive teams play up a year, and some in 2 leagues as well. Should they have been in the top bracket for this spring.... probably not.

That begs the question of development vs winning. I see some folks take one side or another, when IMO there really needs to be a balance.

No there doesn't. The kids will keep the score. The kids will naturally compete. The score needs to be forgotten once you leave the field.

It’s hard for 10 year olds who had a lot of success up until March, to forget 0-3, 0-5, 0-8 scores on the walk back to the car and tears flowing down, and shrug it off. As much as you can ask them if they even remember scores from a year ago and reinforce the journey - that none of the scores matter, for some players it still matters and the succession week after week after week. Expecting all 10 year olds to shrug off those beat downs, kinda unrealistic.

DP here, who starts most of my comments by pointing out that I am no fan of BSC. At all. But your child is 10. They didn’t have “success” earlier in the year, and they don’t have failure now. It’s all just opportunities to play at that age, truly. You really need to reinforce for your DD that wins and losses mean absolutely nothing at that age. If she hates losing? Great. She can hopefully channel that passion into on field performances down the road when wins and losses matter when she’s HS age.

Exactly! A kid responding to wins and losses is a parenting and coaching problem that is fixable.

I don’t have a problem with the losses. I have a problem with playing up and then losing lopsided just as much as I would have had an issue with if they played their level and won lopsided.

Girls have more solutions than boys to get competition at that age so people simply need to be more creative. The ideal scenario is that you are involved in lots of 1-2 goal differential games. Whether you win most or lose most, you are in the best developmental situation possible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well he did put them in a boys league at U9 in the spring. And yes - as another poster commented, most of the competitive teams play up a year, and some in 2 leagues as well. Should they have been in the top bracket for this spring.... probably not.

That begs the question of development vs winning. I see some folks take one side or another, when IMO there really needs to be a balance.

No there doesn't. The kids will keep the score. The kids will naturally compete. The score needs to be forgotten once you leave the field.

It’s hard for 10 year olds who had a lot of success up until March, to forget 0-3, 0-5, 0-8 scores on the walk back to the car and tears flowing down, and shrug it off. As much as you can ask them if they even remember scores from a year ago and reinforce the journey - that none of the scores matter, for some players it still matters and the succession week after week after week. Expecting all 10 year olds to shrug off those beat downs, kinda unrealistic.

That’s sports. There is always a better team and while it sucks to get stomped like that. Coasting through games winning everything is absolutely worse. Develops complacency and pride.

Playing against tougher competition is how you grow. And 10 years of age is old enough to understand how serious you are with soccer. Ecnl is coming up and makes edp look like rec. Fleeing now is probably the right option for you as the training gets significantly harder and coaching is tougher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well he did put them in a boys league at U9 in the spring. And yes - as another poster commented, most of the competitive teams play up a year, and some in 2 leagues as well. Should they have been in the top bracket for this spring.... probably not.

That begs the question of development vs winning. I see some folks take one side or another, when IMO there really needs to be a balance.

No there doesn't. The kids will keep the score. The kids will naturally compete. The score needs to be forgotten once you leave the field.

It’s hard for 10 year olds who had a lot of success up until March, to forget 0-3, 0-5, 0-8 scores on the walk back to the car and tears flowing down, and shrug it off. As much as you can ask them if they even remember scores from a year ago and reinforce the journey - that none of the scores matter, for some players it still matters and the succession week after week after week. Expecting all 10 year olds to shrug off those beat downs, kinda unrealistic.

DP here, who starts most of my comments by pointing out that I am no fan of BSC. At all. But your child is 10. They didn’t have “success” earlier in the year, and they don’t have failure now. It’s all just opportunities to play at that age, truly. You really need to reinforce for your DD that wins and losses mean absolutely nothing at that age. If she hates losing? Great. She can hopefully channel that passion into on field performances down the road when wins and losses matter when she’s HS age.

DP - Both can’t hold. If results genuinely mean nothing, there’s nothing coherent to hate about losing. All competition carries real meaning. The trait you want preserved for later, caring about winning, is the same trait you would suppress now with the early part of your comment. Telling a 10 y/o to internalize that wins and losses mean “absolutely nothing” is training her not to care, and then expecting that caring to switch back on at 14. Competitiveness isn’t a faucet you shut off for four years and reopen on schedule.

[Anonymous]

Getting blown out game after game doesn't do anything for development. Obviously they couldnt compete at that level which means they couldnt do anything on the field to get better. They should have just played in a lower EDP division.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Getting blown out game after game doesn't do anything for development. Obviously they couldnt compete at that level which means they couldnt do anything on the field to get better. They should have just played in a lower EDP division.

I agree. While in theory it probably meant a good deal of experience for the defenders and goalie, I’m guessing the forwards probably got 5-10 possessions in those blowouts. I can understand how less than a minute of quality ball control in an entire months’ worth of games could lead to the sense of player regression; whether it is true or not is in the eye of the beholder. I don’t fault this family taking their player to what they feel would be a better fit. Do what you think is best for your player. And ignore comments from douche’s that say you are fleeing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Getting blown out game after game doesn't do anything for development. Obviously they couldn't compete at that level which means they couldn't do anything on the field to get better. They should have just played in a lower EDP division.

The decision to play up a division ultimately took a devastating emotional toll on the players, overshadowing BM’s well-meaning intentions to accelerate their growth. While the team started the season with strong morale and fought hard in early, competitive losses, the relentless pressure of facing elite opponents systematically broke their spirit. Several heavy defeats stripped the players of their natural swagger and honestly it was hard to watch. They just had another scrimmage vs the 2015 top team again and their remaining confidence completely collapsed into capitulation as the goals mounted. Though BM’s experiment came from a place of deep care, it resulted in a painful lesson. Their spark has been extinguished. With Super Copa on the horizon, I pray they can reignite it and turn it around with a great showing. Next year I hope they will return to their actual age group. I believe this is a vital step to heal their morale, rebuild their broken confidence, and get their swag back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Getting blown out game after game doesn't do anything for development. Obviously they couldn't compete at that level which means they couldn't do anything on the field to get better. They should have just played in a lower EDP division.

The decision to play up a division ultimately took a devastating emotional toll on the players, overshadowing BM’s well-meaning intentions to accelerate their growth. While the team started the season with strong morale and fought hard in early, competitive losses, the relentless pressure of facing elite opponents systematically broke their spirit. Several heavy defeats stripped the players of their natural swagger and honestly it was hard to watch. They just had another scrimmage vs the 2015 top team again and their remaining confidence completely collapsed into capitulation as the goals mounted. Though BM’s experiment came from a place of deep care, it resulted in a painful lesson. Their spark has been extinguished. With Super Copa on the horizon, I pray they can reignite it and turn it around with a great showing. Next year I hope they will return to their actual age group. I believe this is a vital step to heal their morale, rebuild their broken confidence, and get their swag back.

Well at least the kids will have a rich experience, though sad, to relay to their biographers in later life.