Asian moms

[Anonymous]

Are they all controlling and crazy? My friend just had a baby and is having the worst experience with her MIL. The woman is batshit, knows no boundaries and the son seems powerless to reign her in. He keeps making comments about it being an "asian mom" thing. Is this a common thing? I think it's just that his mom is a nutter.

[Anonymous]

Do you know the MIL like that before the baby? So, always that tight of relationship between the mother and son (and DIL)?

[Anonymous]

PP here. Sorry, totally weird mistakes (got a call, was distracted):

Do you know if the MIL was like that before the baby? So, always that kind of relationship between the mother and son (and DIL)?

[Anonymous]

Where in Asia?

[Anonymous]

I had an Asian MIL. I didn't have those problems. She wouldn't necessarily listen to me -- I think partially because there's a language barrier. But she would always listen to her son. (They are Taiwanese)

[Anonymous]

Ásia is such a huuuuuuge continent =\

[Anonymous]

F'ed up, attempting to be controlling ("WAHHHH....I *must* have my way -again- this time!") MIL is NOT limited to Asian heritage, OP.

[Anonymous]

I have a couple friends with cambodian spouses and their MILs aren't necessarily batshit crazy, they just don't respect Mom's wishes. Whatever Mom asks, MIL might take it in to consideration but chances are she is going to do whatever she wants in respect to the child. My friend went out of town for a weekend and left her 2 children with MIL/FIL. Her youngest, a little over a year at the time, was fed all sorts of food that my friend specifically asked MIL not to feed as they were working through some food tolerance concerns. Yeah, he had a boatload of asian food and his stomach wasn't remotely accustomed to it. He had raging diaper rash when she got back as a result of the awesome diarrhea from the food.

[Anonymous]

Is this an Asian thing though? I have a white MIL and the same thing happens. I'm Asian BTW.

[Anonymous]

Well, all I know is my dad was a Tiger Mom before that name existed, and he used to keep a file folder of clippings on Asian (mostly Japanese) parenting and schooling to emulate.

[Anonymous]

PP here. I honestly believe it is NOT an Asian thing. Lets face it, what we read here points to insecure MIL in a p*ssing contest with disinterested DIL.

My MIL is this way, and I don't engage. I don't have anything in common with her, never did anything to her, don't need anything from her, and she is disrespectful to me. So she can suck it.

MILs like this are threatened but he new woman in the family. They should be embracing the DIL, not in a p*ssing contest with them. But some old farts do not like "different". Her problem, not mine. Imagine what the world would be like if we were all like MIL? God help us, really.

[Anonymous]

It's NOT an Asian mom concept.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I think he is using the Asian thing as an excuse for her behavior. He's trying to make it a cultural thing when really she is just a controlling b.

[Anonymous]

Asia is a very large continent...

Anyways, my Indian mil and fil are awesome, so in my limited experience I feel differently.

[Anonymous]

It depends... the only one that I personally know about is a Mexican girl that married a Chinese guy. Culturally so different. At the office, she would tell us the slings and arrows at the hands of her MIL. Hard to tell whether it was that horrible or it was her perception or both.