Steubenville Rape Case: What You Haven't Heard-What lessons do you take from this re:your own boys?

[Anonymous]

http://gma.yahoo.com/steubenville-rape-case-havent-heard-050751050--abc-news-topstories.html

I take away two lessons that I will be instilling in my son.

1) Never share pictures/videos online without the other person's permission.

2) Never hook up with a girl who is drunk.

The second one is a bit strange for me - what do you all think (especially moms of boys)? I hooked up with guys all the time in college when I was drunk. But, having a son, makes me think a bit differently about consent issues.

[Anonymous]

This girl was more than a little tipsy. She was unconscious. It's pretty obvious there was no consent.

[Anonymous]

Lesson? Okay. Son, don't record you and your sub human friends having sex with a girl who is alternatively puking on herself and unconscious. Because that's called RAPE.

Seems simple to me....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lesson? Okay. Son, don't record you and your sub human friends having sex with a girl who is alternatively puking on herself and unconscious. Because that's called RAPE.

Seems simple to me....

+1

I mean, really, OP? Your "takeaway" lessons make it sound like the mistake these boys made were hooking up with a drunk girl and sharing it on social media-- as if somehow they are the victims.

They RAPED and UNCONSCIOUS GIRL and carried her from house to house, where she was ridiculed and urinated on. Sorry, if your teenager participates in this kind of behavior, you have failed as a parent on many levels.

[Anonymous]

Takeaway? No means no. And if she doesn't/CAN'T say yes, then it's a no.

[Anonymous]

This shouldn't even BE a lesson. Its common sense. You don't have sex with someone when they are unconscious. You don't take advantage of someone when they are drunk and/or unconscious.

[Anonymous]

Did you PPs read the article? I have a friend who was sexually assaulted in college, so I am sensitive to the issue. The article makes it out to be a bit more nuanced than just savages raping a poor, innocent victim. I'm sure I'll get flamed, but honestly, drunk girls come on to guys ALL the time. So, basically no guys should ever hook up with drunk girls ever?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This shouldn't even BE a lesson. Its common sense. You don't have sex with someone when they are unconscious. You don't take advantage of someone when they are drunk and/or unconscious.

Okay. So you have NEVER had sex with a guy when you were drunk? Never?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you PPs read the article? I have a friend who was sexually assaulted in college, so I am sensitive to the issue. The article makes it out to be a bit more nuanced than just savages raping a poor, innocent victim. I'm sure I'll get flamed, but honestly, drunk girls come on to guys ALL the time. So, basically no guys should ever hook up with drunk girls ever?

Just because someone comes onto you, does not mean you have to have sex with them. Especially if they are unconscious or drunk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This shouldn't even BE a lesson. Its common sense. You don't have sex with someone when they are unconscious. You don't take advantage of someone when they are drunk and/or unconscious.

Okay. So you have NEVER had sex with a guy when you were drunk? Never?

Not what I said at all. Read it again. I said you don't have sex with someone when they are unconscious (therefore, unable to give consent). And you don't purposely take advantage of someone because they are drunk or unconscious. This is common sense.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I think that your boys should be taught that when someone is intoxicated, they are in no state to "hook up," and that hooking up in those conditions is not behavior that I would expect of my children.

[Anonymous]

oh, and how about a little respect for your fellow man (or woman). All the picture taking and video shooting, and tweeting and social media-ing of a drunk girl being sexually humiliated? Would you be proud of your kids for this behavior?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you PPs read the article? I have a friend who was sexually assaulted in college, so I am sensitive to the issue. The article makes it out to be a bit more nuanced than just savages raping a poor, innocent victim. I'm sure I'll get flamed, but honestly, drunk girls come on to guys ALL the time. So, basically no guys should ever hook up with drunk girls ever?

Basically, yes. The girl vomited, then vomited on herself, then took off her shirt. I don't think there is any gray area there. It's not too hard to teach a man that if a woman has vomit on her breath from alcohol poisoning, she is not is a position to consent.

This is not difficult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you PPs read the article? I have a friend who was sexually assaulted in college, so I am sensitive to the issue. The article makes it out to be a bit more nuanced than just savages raping a poor, innocent victim. I'm sure I'll get flamed, but honestly, drunk girls come on to guys ALL the time. So, basically no guys should ever hook up with drunk girls ever?

That article was "nuanced" to you?

Wow.

OK, even if you think this girl was somehow asking for it... or this was just some crazy drunk kids having fun and hooking up... which boggles my mind, but OK... I'm going to assume you haven't seen the Michael Nordanis video where he describes her as a "dead girl"? And the tweets about people peeing on her? That she DESERVED to be peed on?

The girl was NOT CONSCIOUS. She could NOT CONSENT. I don't know where the confusion lies here. You don't have sex with people who are vomiting and passed out. Jesus H. Christ.

[Anonymous]

I have two sons. I learned nothing from this example. I will teach them that if a woman wants to be intimate with you, she'll still want to be when sober. If she doesn't want to when she's sober than you surely don't want to when she's drunk.