Are we ready for the Thanksgiving Vent thread?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom always focuses on everyone’s body type and weight. She had already asked me how much three people weigh. I always say it’s rude but she doesn’t care. It is so annoying.

How on earth would you know how much someone else weighs? 😂

My MIL is this way, she comments incessantly on everyone's weight. It makes having even minor weight fluctuations stressful because I know she will clock it and then for the next three months be telling everyone she knows that I look like I recently lost or gained like 10 lbs. I feel bad for her because it's obviously because she also pays that kind of attention to her own weight and has her entire life, but also she is totally oblivious to how toxic it is and how it impacts others.

I have managed to get her to not comment on my DD's weight in front of her, but I have no control over what she says about DD when we aren't around -- I'm certain she's discussing DD's weight with everyone she knows. I hope this never gets back to DD but ugh, it might.

The weight comments! My MIL got banned after ranking DD’s entire Girl Scout troop by weight (NOT in front of them, thank god) after we all went to a Girl Scout event while she was visiting. And then refused to use their real names for the rest of the week and just called them by the nicknames she’d made up for them, because names like “Emma” were “so unusual”. So instead my DD would be telling an anecdote about Emma and MIL would say “who? Do you mean the Chubby One? Or do you mean Big Cheeks?”.

She is awful.

My mother is similar. She thinks being fat is a cardinal sin. So she will describe an interaction with someone, and say "We were helped by this person, who was really quite obese, but you know, actually she was really very polite and well-informed." (in a surprised tone of voice), as if being overweight just automatically precludes any good qualities, so she needs to manually add them back in. She also has gradations of adjectives. "Obese" is reserved for unattractive overweight people. "Rotund" is for overweight people who have retained their looks.

She herself is skeletally thin, eats like a bird and has been that way all her life. She has osteoporosis, no muscular strength to speak of and lacks balance, but she apparently isn't making any connection related to her eating habits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not a huge thing, but I've had major medical issues this year. I’m starting to feel better, but I have strong food aversions as a side effect of meds. I normally cook Thanksgiving dinner and love it, bur this year im ki d of just offering my recipes ans small amounts of help.

The only thing I was looking forward to and feel I could stomach is pumpkin pie which my niece baked yesterday. The first one she baked came out weird (seems likely she left out an ingredient). DH went out to get ingredients again last night, and she baked it again
I was exhausted so went to sleep while it baked. This morning I discovered they had left it out on the counter...there is no way with my health issues I can risk eating it...but everyone else seems fine, and the oven is needed for other things today

The pie is fine. When you buy them at the grocery store they are not refrigerated. The darn thing cooks for 50 minutes, it’s safe to eat.

I'm immunosuppressed and spent several months barely able to leave my house. I'm not taking the risk.

It’s not a risk but keep being dramatic if it makes you feel better

Also DH should have just bought you a pie when he went out to get more ingredients for niece. Sorry you were sick but you seem to be wallowing in it. It reminds me of the Thanksgiving where SIL finally joined us after years of not coming only to pronounce at dinner that she had a pre cancerous spot on her gums she had removed.

Because the grocery store pie has fewer germs?

No! Although- maybe? Just that if pie is all she can eat and all she wants after being ill for so long, and niece already messed up one, DH should have bought a Gf pumpkin pie when he bought more pie ingredients to ensure she had her dang pie! Better yet, PP should have brought her own pie or had one delivered. It’s not that serious. Being sick sucks but people are also allowed to have a day with no negativity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom always focuses on everyone’s body type and weight. She had already asked me how much three people weigh. I always say it’s rude but she doesn’t care. It is so annoying.

How on earth would you know how much someone else weighs? 😂

My MIL is this way, she comments incessantly on everyone's weight. It makes having even minor weight fluctuations stressful because I know she will clock it and then for the next three months be telling everyone she knows that I look like I recently lost or gained like 10 lbs. I feel bad for her because it's obviously because she also pays that kind of attention to her own weight and has her entire life, but also she is totally oblivious to how toxic it is and how it impacts others.

I have managed to get her to not comment on my DD's weight in front of her, but I have no control over what she says about DD when we aren't around -- I'm certain she's discussing DD's weight with everyone she knows. I hope this never gets back to DD but ugh, it might.

The weight comments! My MIL got banned after ranking DD’s entire Girl Scout troop by weight (NOT in front of them, thank god) after we all went to a Girl Scout event while she was visiting. And then refused to use their real names for the rest of the week and just called them by the nicknames she’d made up for them, because names like “Emma” were “so unusual”. So instead my DD would be telling an anecdote about Emma and MIL would say “who? Do you mean the Chubby One? Or do you mean Big Cheeks?”.

She is awful.

My mother is similar. She thinks being fat is a cardinal sin. So she will describe an interaction with someone, and say "We were helped by this person, who was really quite obese, but you know, actually she was really very polite and well-informed." (in a surprised tone of voice), as if being overweight just automatically precludes any good qualities, so she needs to manually add them back in. She also has gradations of adjectives. "Obese" is reserved for unattractive overweight people. "Rotund" is for overweight people who have retained their looks.

She herself is skeletally thin, eats like a bird and has been that way all her life. She has osteoporosis, no muscular strength to speak of and lacks balance, but she apparently isn't making any connection related to her eating habits.

Damn, now im curious which one I would be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WOW, YOUR DAUGHTER SURE LIKES TO SLEEP!
GRANDDAUGHTER SUREEEEEE LIKES TO SLEEP!
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU ALL SLEEP SO LATE!
GOOD MORNING, SLEEPYHEAD!
WOW, THERE SHE IS!

This nonsense goes on from 6 a.m. forward.

Same. We are not in that person's house today, but we hear this all the time when we are.

I'm adding this to my list of things never to say.

My dad used to say "She lives!" when I'd get up at like 9am on a holiday. So grating. I will never understand people who are resentful that someone is getting rest. Unless there are chores to be done and someone has an obligation or commitment to do them early, why do you care?

I think you’re missing your Dad’s dry sense of humor. I’m sure he’s kidding.

I get it. Still, it’s annoying and not funny. -NP whose dad loves to make comments like this

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WOW, YOUR DAUGHTER SURE LIKES TO SLEEP!
GRANDDAUGHTER SUREEEEEE LIKES TO SLEEP!
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU ALL SLEEP SO LATE!
GOOD MORNING, SLEEPYHEAD!
WOW, THERE SHE IS!

This nonsense goes on from 6 a.m. forward.

Same. We are not in that person's house today, but we hear this all the time when we are.

I'm adding this to my list of things never to say.

My dad used to say "She lives!" when I'd get up at like 9am on a holiday. So grating. I will never understand people who are resentful that someone is getting rest. Unless there are chores to be done and someone has an obligation or commitment to do them early, why do you care?

I think you’re missing your Dad’s dry sense of humor. I’m sure he’s kidding.

No one is confused as to whether or not he's kidding. Jokes get old. 9am is not an unreasonable time to get up on a holiday if you don't have young children.

You need to lighten up.

Or her dad could stop saying the same lame jokes that are actually judgmental jabs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe steak tips BIL has an iron stomach

Maybe, in which case he should have made his bacteria filled steak tips in his own home instead of bringing them to a family event and repeatedly trying to get other people to eat them.

Or maybe he's about to have the worst night of his life.

[Anonymous]

OP here, I didn't have a chance to come back until now (I see a couple people said they were OP but that wasn't me). This weekend wasn't actually terrible - the only thing I have to vent about is so petty that it's not even a vent and that's just that we watched a movie that my in laws have insisted for years that they want to watch first with my kids and then they talked through the movie so much that I had to shush them multiple times to say "just let the kids watch the movie, you don't need to explain things to them" several times. But they're leaving tomorrow and that dumb petty thing is my only vent. I'm as shocked as you are!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have an improvement this year - my MIL used to always comment on weight but this year she said "you look younger, what have you done?" and I was like "oh maybe this new moisturizer I've been using".

Readers, I lost 30lbs.

I love this. It took me until now to realize the fun game of responding with some inane reply. “What’s the secret ingredient to this delicious dish? Oh, maybe the new salt I picked up.”
Certainly not the incredibly tedious sauce made from scratch with bone marrow and truffles….

I'm honestly thinking about buying her my new moisturizer for Christmas!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is such a petty vent. We were invited to a family friend's house for Thanksgiving. One of my favorite Thanksgiving foods is stuffing. These people put candied walnuts in their stuffing and I have a nut allergy. I may go buy some Stove Top tomorrow to have with my leftovers.

That's on you for not telling them about your nut allergy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Steak tips PP checking in.

Folks, he is about to eat the steak tips. The rest of us went out to dinner. He declined to join us and we came home to a house that smells of sizzling steaks. I'm revolted but curious to see what happens.

Everyone heads home tomorrow. Bless.

OMG< I hope he leaves before he gets sick!! Give him a bucket, make sure he has easy access to the bathroom tonight!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not a big one, but my MIL have exactly five conversation topics, on repeat:
1) Headaches; who has one, what caused it, what might cure it
2) Jim, do you remember Name? You know, Name, the Person who did the Thing? No? You know Name. Well anyway, Name died.
3) Weather!
4) Traffic!
5) We’re thinking about building a cabin on our land in West Virginia. We’ve been looking at plans. I think we’re going to move forward in the spring. (They’ve been saying this for at least 16 years with no action.)

I’ll be hearing some version of #2 this weekend. Not that the person died, thankfully, but some random update about their life.

You remember X? You knew them when you were a teenager. X just moved to Michigan.

Hard to know how to respond besides, “oh, hope he likes it there.”

One time, my mother literally did this. "Do you remember Older Brother's friend from 1st grade? You were in preschool then. (Um vaguely) Well, remember Friend's mother? Well her sister adopted a daughter, and now, 35 years later, Old Brother's Friend's Mother's Sister's Adopted Daughter's Biological Grandma died. Do you want the address to send a sympathy card?"

I think I've had that discussion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not a huge thing, but I've had major medical issues this year. I’m starting to feel better, but I have strong food aversions as a side effect of meds. I normally cook Thanksgiving dinner and love it, bur this year im ki d of just offering my recipes ans small amounts of help.

The only thing I was looking forward to and feel I could stomach is pumpkin pie which my niece baked yesterday. The first one she baked came out weird (seems likely she left out an ingredient). DH went out to get ingredients again last night, and she baked it again
I was exhausted so went to sleep while it baked. This morning I discovered they had left it out on the counter...there is no way with my health issues I can risk eating it...but everyone else seems fine, and the oven is needed for other things today

If it finished baking late at night of course it had to be left on the counter! Who puts a hot pie in the fridge. It’s perfectly safe to eat

It needs to cool for 2 hours and then go directly into the frig. This goes for all custard pies.

This is just some arbitrary guideline that makes sure nothing ever happens, but I am sure if it’s out for 6 hrs nothing will happen as well. Even to an immunocompromised person

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Libby's canned pumpkin has that classic pie recipe on the back. I went and looked at it.
It says "...cool on wire rack for 2 hours then serve immediately or refrigerate."

Yeah there’s also a guideline that pizza shouldn’t be sitting out more than 2 hrs. I’ve left pizza out for hrs on end and nobody got hurt ever

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Steak tips PP checking in.

Folks, he is about to eat the steak tips. The rest of us went out to dinner. He declined to join us and we came home to a house that smells of sizzling steaks. I'm revolted but curious to see what happens.

Everyone heads home tomorrow. Bless.

You hope he goes home, but me thinks he won’t be leaving your bathroom.

This is a fair concern.

He offered the steak to everyone. We are all legitimately stuffed after leftovers for lunch, restaurant dinner, and pie.

He therefore consumed them all himself.

I wish I was making this up.

The one silver lining here is that him eating them means we don't have to dispose of them -- I didn't want to be tossing rotting steak in our trash cans that won't be picked up until Monday, but I also didn't want the botulism in my fridge.

Freeze the botulism and you’re good

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom always focuses on everyone’s body type and weight. She had already asked me how much three people weigh. I always say it’s rude but she doesn’t care. It is so annoying.

How on earth would you know how much someone else weighs? 😂

My MIL is this way, she comments incessantly on everyone's weight. It makes having even minor weight fluctuations stressful because I know she will clock it and then for the next three months be telling everyone she knows that I look like I recently lost or gained like 10 lbs. I feel bad for her because it's obviously because she also pays that kind of attention to her own weight and has her entire life, but also she is totally oblivious to how toxic it is and how it impacts others.

I have managed to get her to not comment on my DD's weight in front of her, but I have no control over what she says about DD when we aren't around -- I'm certain she's discussing DD's weight with everyone she knows. I hope this never gets back to DD but ugh, it might.

The weight comments! My MIL got banned after ranking DD’s entire Girl Scout troop by weight (NOT in front of them, thank god) after we all went to a Girl Scout event while she was visiting. And then refused to use their real names for the rest of the week and just called them by the nicknames she’d made up for them, because names like “Emma” were “so unusual”. So instead my DD would be telling an anecdote about Emma and MIL would say “who? Do you mean the Chubby One? Or do you mean Big Cheeks?”.

She is awful.

My mother is similar. She thinks being fat is a cardinal sin. So she will describe an interaction with someone, and say "We were helped by this person, who was really quite obese, but you know, actually she was really very polite and well-informed." (in a surprised tone of voice), as if being overweight just automatically precludes any good qualities, so she needs to manually add them back in. She also has gradations of adjectives. "Obese" is reserved for unattractive overweight people. "Rotund" is for overweight people who have retained their looks.

She herself is skeletally thin, eats like a bird and has been that way all her life. She has osteoporosis, no muscular strength to speak of and lacks balance, but she apparently isn't making any connection related to her eating habits.

Damn, now im curious which one I would be.

Rotund on a good day