DS given melatonin gummies as prank by “friends at sleepover

Anonymous
Your son was assaulted, again and again and again. Each time he ate a gummy and nobody stopped him. Each time a marker touched his skin and nobody stopped it. Each moment he slept and nobody went to tell an adult.

Yes, please please please report this.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I work in a sports related field and the stories of what teammates do to each other would apparently surprise some of you. Yes, kids, not adults. The hazing and bullying and harassment and physical assaults…good luck to your kids if you think this doesn’t sound real.

And OP being concerned these kids have a high social status SHOULD worry OP. It’s not a sign she’s a troll. The power imbalance is a common factor in hazing and bullying and often contributes to why it continues to happen. Bystanders are afraid to speak up because they’re afraid of being targeted next. Adults don’t want to rock the boat or simply can’t believe (see above) that these great athletes might also be horrible people.


This is the biggest problem. Coaches careers hinge on star athletes, not on being coaches or developing players. No coach is going to put the foot down on hazing and bullying because it means they have to kick stars off the team.

The solution is that when these little jerks are caught, the coaches should be suspended- no questions asked. Didn't know? Too bad. You should have.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Tell the parents. I would even consider getting your kid a therapist if he falls apart over you telling. He needs to understand how serious this is and if that boy doesn't have any consequences next time he could end up killing someone. Yes, kids have died from too much melatonin. I think it was younger kids, but this is serious and cannot be ignored. Your son also needs to learn that his health and safety matter more than fitting in. If he doesn't learn this lesson, he will be prey for frat boys hazing and doing other things. It's hard to stand up for justice as parents and as kids, but this is truly disturbing and cannot be ignored.


They TOLD the parents already - about 6 pages ago!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.


This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.


Restraining order


At that point it’s easier to switch schools.


Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.



When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.


Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.


I also suspect OP is a troll. Don't most soccer leagues end the season in May?


I suspect your not very bright. I think you and PP are the trolls. Can’t anyone just come on here and ask for support or advice without everyone trying to be a modern Sherlock Holmes and find flaws and pick it apart. Even if soccer ended in May who gives a F? My kids play on teams that ended in May and they all still get together over the summer as a team for things like this. Honestly, you can really see the adults here who probably spawned the very same kinds of kids who do stuff like this to others.


But they had practice yesterday


This does seem suspect. All of the kids are done, except the ones going to championships. This means there’s a very narrow set of kids this could be. OP if your son is on the team I’m guessing he’s on, that culture is highly toxic.


My kids are ALL in sports. Camps, clubs, summer workouts, etc.
The seasons don't end when the seasons end.
Anonymous
One day it’s melatonin gummies the next it could be a pill laced with fentanyl. Prank or no prank they crossed safety lines ( and not one of them was there to check in him) and it needs to be addressed with their parents.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/CtwpDs1A7bV/?igshid=ZmZiYTY5ZDNhOA==
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.


This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.


Restraining order


At that point it’s easier to switch schools.


Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.



When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.


Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.


I also suspect OP is a troll. Don't most soccer leagues end the season in May?


I suspect your not very bright. I think you and PP are the trolls. Can’t anyone just come on here and ask for support or advice without everyone trying to be a modern Sherlock Holmes and find flaws and pick it apart. Even if soccer ended in May who gives a F? My kids play on teams that ended in May and they all still get together over the summer as a team for things like this. Honestly, you can really see the adults here who probably spawned the very same kinds of kids who do stuff like this to others.


But they had practice yesterday


This does seem suspect. All of the kids are done, except the ones going to championships. This means there’s a very narrow set of kids this could be. OP if your son is on the team I’m guessing he’s on, that culture is highly toxic.
There are summer rec leagues, summer skills camps, etc.


OP could have changed the sport. I do that all the time.
Anonymous
Did the coach respond? I saw the parent responses, but am hoping to not have to weed through 20 pages.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Did the coach respond? I saw the parent responses, but am hoping to not have to weed through 20 pages.


OP has gone MIA - may have been a troll...
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Np. I am so sorry this happened. My thoughts:

1. Tell the school. I’m no longer in DMV but at our public kids can be disciplined for activities that take place outside school. They may be able to help determine whether anything has been uploaded to social media.

You also don’t want your kid to have any classes with these boys and they should have different lunch periods.

2. Tell the coach. He has a problem on his team and needs to know.

3. Tell the parents. I like the idea of a group email to all of them. You shouldn’t have to send 14 separate emails.

4. Help for your son: therapist to process the incident and confirm it was not his fault. Also, to increase confidence so he learns that these guys are not his friends and that he should not aspire to be friends with him.

Good luck and please keep us posted. Your kid sounds awesome and he does not need to hang out with these jerks.


This is unnecessary and very likely impossible.


Restraining order


At that point it’s easier to switch schools.


Only 5 of the kids go to the same school as DS. He has his own friends at school outside these boys.

But these boys (soccer boys) are of a higher social status and could make DS life hell if the wish. He knows that.



When will this social status crap end. They already made his life miserable. He needs to make friends with the football, hockey and lacrosse players if your concern is them bullying him. Soccer isn’t exactly known for, well, anything in the US except children’s activities. Maybe a new sport would help.


Oh, he is in track too. He’s a so-so soccer player on a so-so team but he’s very talented as a long distance runner. Obviously also not a super respected sport, but he truly excels.

This is such a weird comment.

+1
OP I’m beginning to think you’re a troll or a bored teenager obsessed with social status. If you are not, then please stop trying to decide what’s respected or not, what’s where in a social hierarchy, etc. It’s not clear if your son plays hs soccer or just club. Regardless he should drop both since he doesn’t sound great and his team is not adding anything to his life. Instead put him in hs cross country (same season as soccer anyways), indoor and outdoor track.


I also suspect OP is a troll. Don't most soccer leagues end the season in May?


I suspect your not very bright. I think you and PP are the trolls. Can’t anyone just come on here and ask for support or advice without everyone trying to be a modern Sherlock Holmes and find flaws and pick it apart. Even if soccer ended in May who gives a F? My kids play on teams that ended in May and they all still get together over the summer as a team for things like this. Honestly, you can really see the adults here who probably spawned the very same kinds of kids who do stuff like this to others.


But they had practice yesterday


This does seem suspect. All of the kids are done, except the ones going to championships. This means there’s a very narrow set of kids this could be. OP if your son is on the team I’m guessing he’s on, that culture is highly toxic.
There are summer rec leagues, summer skills camps, etc.


OP could have changed the sport. I do that all the time.


+1 could have changed the details to make it a different sport or changed the kids ages slightly etc.

OP I would file a police report. I’m not surprised that some of the parents are blowing you off. There’s jerk parents and jerk kids everywhere.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Did the coach respond? I saw the parent responses, but am hoping to not have to weed through 20 pages.


OP has gone MIA - may have been a troll...
Or OP has a life beyond DCUM. Imagine that.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Did the coach respond? I saw the parent responses, but am hoping to not have to weed through 20 pages.


OP has gone MIA - may have been a troll...
Or OP has a life beyond DCUM. Imagine that.


Nope can't...
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Melatonin is not dangerous at all.


If taken in small does and you know about it. Many will even disagree with that.

I let one of my teens take a small dose of melatonin before bed. We discuss with his doctor every year and he’s okay with this.

I would be livid if I was OP. You shouldn’t sneak anything with the intention on having someone else take it without their knowledge.

No, I would not tell the parents but I’d encourage my kid to find new friends/team and I would say no to future sleepovers. Telling parents isn’t effective at this age. More often it causes more issues.


We gave melatonin to my tween for years, as needed and in small doses. We tried a new brand once, only because we ran out of the other, and he had an adverse reaction where he was literally unconscious. Couldn’t be woken up. EMTs called and everything. We were told that because melatonin is unregulated, dosage varies by brand regardless of what’s on the bottle, and there’s no way of telling what else is in there. I’ve always been crazy careful with what I give my kids for meds, but I, like everyone else, just assumed that melatonin was totally safe because it’s not a drug. The pharmacist said she’s heard of similar reactions in kids, although not as extreme as ours, and said to avoid it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP, does he know what brand of gummies?

I have horrible sleep issues and take a brand called Olly and it also has some botanical additives. Including L-theanine. You are going to want to make sure it was melatonin only.

I would call and try to figure out what was given to him exactly (dosage too).


Maybe this is the segue into calling the parents where the sleepover happened. You could call and say the ER is asking for more info on the substance your DS was given.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP - any update?


We did find out some of this was uploaded to TikTok so we had to escalate our reactions a bit. Coaches have been great as have a few parents. So we feel mostly supported.


We’re getting it all figured out and I appreciate the feedback.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP - any update?


We did find out some of this was uploaded to TikTok so we had to escalate our reactions a bit. Coaches have been great as have a few parents. So we feel mostly supported.


We’re getting it all figured out and I appreciate the feedback.


Wow, OP. I’m so sorry. But thank goodness your son has parents who stand up for him. For a kid who lacked parental support this could have been truly life altering.
post reply Forum Index » Tweens and Teens
Message Quick Reply
Go to: