smart, bored 2nd grader, can't afford private, what to do?

[Anonymous]

we are stuck with our public school. can't afford to move (dh lost his job) can't go private. teacher complains all the time that dd doesn't pay attention, is always talking with neighbors, not focusing on the (boring!!) lessons, etc. she implied that dd has adhd until I pointed out that dd read The Lightening Thief in two hours straight, sitting right next to me. then she grudgingly agreed that dd reads and comprehends at the highest level she tests for, and "maybe even higher"

I've suggested she let dd write about things dd is interested in instead of writing about the dullsville, unimaginative topics she suggests, but she said, no, it would be "too hard for me to grade if your dd wrote about something different than everyone else does"!!

our district offers no gifted program for elementary, so dd is stuck in this boring boring boring classroom all day long!! I don't know what to do. i offer lots of interesting things to do at home, but feel helpless about protecting dd from this daily misery. dd is not a genius or anything, just a smart, bored kid.

Oh, and when I suggest other things, like letting dd read interesting books instead of listening to the lessons about things dd's read already (dd's an extremely fast reader), dd's teacher told me that she can't allow that!!

any suggestions? anyone dealt successfully with a similar situation? i'd send dd to private in a second if we had the money. it's torture to send my child to school every day.

[Anonymous]

Homeschool

[Anonymous]

Can she skip a grade?

[Anonymous]

Is it just this teacher or are all of them this bad in the school? I'd be having lots of conversations with the principle at this point trying to get my kid a different teacher. Otherwise, can your DH homeschool for a while? Sorry - this sounds dreadful.

[Anonymous]

The teacher doesn't sound very open to anything outside routine, unfortunately.

Any chance of doing a combination of rewards for listening quietly and paying attention, plus allowing her to have free reading time when her work is completed in each class?

[Anonymous]

Where do you live? I can't think of a county in the area that doesn't have a gifted program.

[Anonymous]

I don't live in DC area. There is NO gifted program here in elementary. They have this integrated classroom b.s. that's totally dependent on the initiative of the teacher. Last year dd had a great teacher, none of these inattention problems.

It's getting to the point where I'm thinking of sending dd to school with a book and telling her to just spend the day reading it! DD does have good friends at school, and they play together at recess and sit together at lunch, so I don't want to take her away from that social situation. I can't get dd moved to another classroom unless there's an exceptional situation, and right now the teacher is blaming it all on dd's lack of ability to sit quietly in her desk and do soul-killing drudgery like all the other children.

I think it may be too late to skip a grade, since dd isn't ahead in math. I like the rewards idea, but dd wants her reward to be social time with her friends, which is a no-no in her classroom.

Here's an example: DD did all the math problems in her head, but was reprimanded and accused of CHEATING because she didn't show her work on paper. I had to sign a piece of paper saying that DD did all the work herself. When I asked the teacher why DD had to show her work, the teacher said it was required on standardized tests, and she must get into the habit of doing so. I can see this at higher levels of math, but in 2nd grade???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where do you live? I can't think of a county in the area that doesn't have a gifted program.

Really? DC doesn't.

[Anonymous]

OP, just a quick post to say that there are national organization for gifted education that can help you. They might be able to help you articulate what your child needs and advocate for it at the school. There are outside learning opportunities, online learning, etc.
Consider getting your child tested. It will be a valuable tool you can use when communicating with the school and district administration.
Grade acceleration (skipping) is possible, even now. Kids do move up at the end of a semester. With winter break approaching, it's possible arrangements could be made. Have you spoken with the principal? You'll need to do that first. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't live in DC area. There is NO gifted program here in elementary. They have this integrated classroom b.s. that's totally dependent on the initiative of the teacher. Last year dd had a great teacher, none of these inattention problems.

It's getting to the point where I'm thinking of sending dd to school with a book and telling her to just spend the day reading it! DD does have good friends at school, and they play together at recess and sit together at lunch, so I don't want to take her away from that social situation. I can't get dd moved to another classroom unless there's an exceptional situation, and right now the teacher is blaming it all on dd's lack of ability to sit quietly in her desk and do soul-killing drudgery like all the other children.

I think it may be too late to skip a grade, since dd isn't ahead in math. I like the rewards idea, but dd wants her reward to be social time with her friends, which is a no-no in her classroom.

Here's an example: DD did all the math problems in her head, but was reprimanded and accused of CHEATING because she didn't show her work on paper. I had to sign a piece of paper saying that DD did all the work herself. When I asked the teacher why DD had to show her work, the teacher said it was required on standardized tests, and she must get into the habit of doing so. I can see this at higher levels of math, but in 2nd grade???

I empathize with your situation but the example you give doesn't make your case for you. Children also have to learn to follow directions. If the directions include showing work then she needs to show her work. She can't go to school and take a book to read when it's not the right time. Yes, she's bright and yes, she's bored. However, part of school is learning to play the game. Part of the game is listening, not talking with your friends, and showing your work. She needs to be reminded she's not in charge of the class -- no matter how uninspired and unimaginative her teacher is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:we are stuck with our public school. can't afford to move (dh lost his job) can't go private. teacher complains all the time that dd doesn't pay attention, is always talking with neighbors, not focusing on the (boring!!) lessons, etc. she implied that dd has adhd until I pointed out that dd read The Lightening Thief in two hours straight, sitting right next to me. then she grudgingly agreed that dd reads and comprehends at the highest level she tests for, and "maybe even higher"

I've suggested she let dd write about things dd is interested in instead of writing about the dullsville, unimaginative topics she suggests, but she said, no, it would be "too hard for me to grade if your dd wrote about something different than everyone else does"!!

our district offers no gifted program for elementary, so dd is stuck in this boring boring boring classroom all day long!! I don't know what to do. i offer lots of interesting things to do at home, but feel helpless about protecting dd from this daily misery. dd is not a genius or anything, just a smart, bored kid.

Oh, and when I suggest other things, like letting dd read interesting books instead of listening to the lessons about things dd's read already (dd's an extremely fast reader), dd's teacher told me that she can't allow that!!

any suggestions? anyone dealt successfully with a similar situation? i'd send dd to private in a second if we had the money. it's torture to send my child to school every day.

Your DD has ADHD. She isn't bored. Get her evaluated.

I am adult and have it and I can and have sat for 6 hours straight reading a book that I really like. The ability to hyper focus on something a person really likes is one of the traits of ADHD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't live in DC area. There is NO gifted program here in elementary. They have this integrated classroom b.s. that's totally dependent on the initiative of the teacher. Last year dd had a great teacher, none of these inattention problems.

It's getting to the point where I'm thinking of sending dd to school with a book and telling her to just spend the day reading it! DD does have good friends at school, and they play together at recess and sit together at lunch, so I don't want to take her away from that social situation. I can't get dd moved to another classroom unless there's an exceptional situation, and right now the teacher is blaming it all on dd's lack of ability to sit quietly in her desk and do soul-killing drudgery like all the other children.

I think it may be too late to skip a grade, since dd isn't ahead in math. I like the rewards idea, but dd wants her reward to be social time with her friends, which is a no-no in her classroom.

Here's an example: DD did all the math problems in her head, but was reprimanded and accused of CHEATING because she didn't show her work on paper. I had to sign a piece of paper saying that DD did all the work herself. When I asked the teacher why DD had to show her work, the teacher said it was required on standardized tests, and she must get into the habit of doing so. I can see this at higher levels of math, but in 2nd grade???

OP I remember that being the standard when *I* was in second grade (decades ago!). If I would finish my work early, then go to the class library and get a book. I never had to be disruptive. Asking if your dd can read during the teacher's lesson is insulting and rude. Maybe your kid has a behavior problem and is not quite as gifted as you think she is. You sound entitled and snobby.

[Anonymous]

Can you ask the school for testing to demonstrate high I.Q. They ought to provide that at least. If not, can you afford to do it outside so when teacher hits you up with the "ADHD thing" again (by the way it is illegal for teachers to diagnose students) you have ammo.

[Anonymous]

Fwiw, OP, school is boring for lots of kids, but that doesn't necessarily mean your child is gifted. She may be, but don't jump from the determination that your child is bored to the assumption that she's just too smart for the class. Secondly, the issue of showing the work for math is hardly an outrage - that was the requirement when I was a kid and it's still a requirement for my 3rd grader. Finally, you are quick to diagnose your child as NOT having ADHD, and I"m not in a position to contradict you -- but note that there is a variant of ADHD where the issue is inability to concentrate (I believe it's called ADHD/inattentive.) Kids with this type of ADHD can focus on some solo activities but have difficulties in group settings. I mention this because when I've posted on these boards about my child's struggles, others have suggested that as a possibility. Just something to consider.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't live in DC area. There is NO gifted program here in elementary. They have this integrated classroom b.s. that's totally dependent on the initiative of the teacher. Last year dd had a great teacher, none of these inattention problems.

It's getting to the point where I'm thinking of sending dd to school with a book and telling her to just spend the day reading it! DD does have good friends at school, and they play together at recess and sit together at lunch, so I don't want to take her away from that social situation. I can't get dd moved to another classroom unless there's an exceptional situation, and right now the teacher is blaming it all on dd's lack of ability to sit quietly in her desk and do soul-killing drudgery like all the other children.

I think it may be too late to skip a grade, since dd isn't ahead in math. I like the rewards idea, but dd wants her reward to be social time with her friends, which is a no-no in her classroom.

Here's an example: DD did all the math problems in her head, but was reprimanded and accused of CHEATING because she didn't show her work on paper. I had to sign a piece of paper saying that DD did all the work herself. When I asked the teacher why DD had to show her work, the teacher said it was required on standardized tests, and she must get into the habit of doing so. I can see this at higher levels of math, but in 2nd grade???

Ugh -for shame that your child may need to learn to listen and follow direction ...like all the other children.