Family Beach House- DS and Friends Using it for Summer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who invited this friend? Your DS? Why didn't he run it by you prior to inviting the friend?

This is a great question. If DS invited this kid without telling you, I would be more mad at him than anyone. If this kid invited himself, that's a different story. Either way, the kid's mom is out of line.

I don't think $1K for a summer at the beach is unreasonable. I worked at the beach during college and made $12K in 3 months waiting tables. And that was 20 years ago. But if you are trying to charge AFTER the kid was already told it would be free, that looks bad on you. Even if your son is really the one to blame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Whatever anyone thinks about the shed/carriage house is irrelevant. It’s a distraction. The important part is that the boy’s family was not on the same page about the house as OP. That means it’s a bad arrangement and they should part ways.

Everything else is noise.

The "noise" is the interesting part, PP. There's no rule on DCUM that posters can only consider a question posed by the OP. OP may actually be interested in advice on whether or not she should go ballistic on a friend who is now badmouthing her all over town and rescind the original "invitation", and some of you have focused on that narrow question and responded accordingly. But many of us are focusing on the far more interesting questions of law, ethics, social class, and values related to the situation OP has described. You don't have to stay for that part if you don't find it interesting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: OP here.

I withdrew the offer yesterday afternoon and another boy was offered the same deal. He and his parents accepted it immediately.

The first boy's mom sent me (and one of my BILs who'd been on the email thread) a long rambling email calling us "assholes" and then concluded by asking if he could actually take the deal. We said no.

Then she defriended me on FB. lol.

Depending on her age, probably canceled you too.

At least this is now this is an "offer" of a "deal."

And not an invitation. At least you did not bait and switch this family for their kid to stay in the shed of the generational 3-bed 1-bath house down in NC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They can't rent it out going by the North Carolina Landlord-Tenant laws. That room would have to have a working smoke detector, and the shed would have to comply with current building and housing codes. They also have to install at least one carbon monoxide detector prior to a tenancy, and would have to be inspected, and in good repair.

Also, they would need to notify their insurance among other things. If something happened and the boy ended up suing the insurance could deny the claim because of non-disclosure. Whereas if a guest was injured your homeowners policy would protect the client.

How sweet that you think all rented homes are code compliant. I was a property inspector in NYC in the 90s. Maybe 40% were up to code. Didn't matter- all were rented.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They can't rent it out going by the North Carolina Landlord-Tenant laws. That room would have to have a working smoke detector, and the shed would have to comply with current building and housing codes. They also have to install at least one carbon monoxide detector prior to a tenancy, and would have to be inspected, and in good repair.

Also, they would need to notify their insurance among other things. If something happened and the boy ended up suing the insurance could deny the claim because of non-disclosure. Whereas if a guest was injured your homeowners policy would protect the client.

How sweet that you think all rented homes are code compliant. I was a property inspector in NYC in the 90s. Maybe 40% were up to code. Didn't matter- all were rented.

They can do what they want obviously! Even rent out the dog house, but it's a lot of liability and sure they can draw up any lease they want. It won't be legal going by what OP states.
It would suck to be sued and your insurance refuses to pay all those costs. Over $1000. LOL

I think what likely happened the boys parents canceled on the "deal".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My college age kids are paying $1200/mon to live in a city and do an internship. OP Your friend is crazy.

NP I assume your kid has running water and a toilet, right?

OP's kid and the other kid both have equal access to water and toilets. Did you miss that part or is your reading comprehension so poor that you didn't understand it?

You actually don't understand equality. Shed kid has to leave the building and walk outside to use the bathroom. That's not equal. What if the inside kids accidentally locked him out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

I withdrew the offer yesterday afternoon and another boy was offered the same deal. He and his parents accepted it immediately.

The first boy's mom sent me (and one of my BILs who'd been on the email thread) a long rambling email calling us "assholes" and then concluded by asking if he could actually take the deal. We said no.

Then she defriended me on FB. lol.

That's a load - didn't happen.

I don’t believe that update either.

+100

No mention as to how OP’s son feels about her uninviting his friend, etc.

I know, what a shame. We took our kid's friends on vacations and paid for everything. You don't really want to charge friends or family, certainly don't put yourself in that position.

We believe you!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

I withdrew the offer yesterday afternoon and another boy was offered the same deal. He and his parents accepted it immediately.

The first boy's mom sent me (and one of my BILs who'd been on the email thread) a long rambling email calling us "assholes" and then concluded by asking if he could actually take the deal. We said no.

Then she defriended me on FB. lol.

That's a load - didn't happen.

I don’t believe that update either.

+100

No mention as to how OP’s son feels about her uninviting his friend, etc.

I know, what a shame. We took our kid's friends on vacations and paid for everything. You don't really want to charge friends or family, certainly don't put yourself in that position.

I’m another one who hosts my kids friends. For free. For extended periods of time at my vacation place. I would never think to ask for money. I don’t need the money and they are my kids guests. Different strokes for different folks I guess.

I think it’s hilarious that the lawyer BILs want to draw up a lease for a shed. I’d love to see that lease. I feel bad for the OP’s kid who probably lost a good friend because of his moms awful behavior.

We believe you!!!

[Anonymous]

It was an unusual way to rent a room at the beach with AC & access to the larger house with kitchen bath shower etc etc with friends at a very reasonable price.
Nothing beats free but maintaining a beach house that you own is hardly free. Now that mom has gotten involved that’s the end of the summer working at the beach for that kid because housing is not easy to find.
A lease would have assured him of staying the whole summer instead of you’ve been free loading long enough so leave now. All this ridiculousness about a $10 smoke detector.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My college age kids are paying $1200/mon to live in a city and do an internship. OP Your friend is crazy.

NP I assume your kid has running water and a toilet, right?

OP's kid and the other kid both have equal access to water and toilets. Did you miss that part or is your reading comprehension so poor that you didn't understand it?

You actually don't understand equality. Shed kid has to leave the building and walk outside to use the bathroom. That's not equal. What if the inside kids accidentally locked him out?

There are many circumstances of a room with shared bathroom and kitchen for students. It’s the price you pay for short term rentals in beach communities for very cheap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No one is getting rich of the $100. Lets be real. The kids share of water, electricity, gas, and cable/internet is easily $150 a month. Insurance is easily another $75 on top, then taxes are probably another $100. So, just the cost of having him there is $250 a month or $750 a summer. That means he's getting a private, air conditioned room for $83 a month.

So its fair to say the kid is living for nearly free. Or at the very least he is extremely subsidized.

I'm in team OP camp.

Screw the wannabe free loader.

That's ridiculous because there will be four people sharing those expenses. And wtf is insurance? You pay insurance when you go to your own family's house? Are you talking about property taxes and property insurance? Kid isnt costing you that, letting the three boys is costk g them that.

Regardless, 10 bucks says scorned friend ends up crashing on the couch a lot of the summer unbeknownst to op. Sounds like a fun summer and I'm sure her ds is humiliated and mad at her

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My college age kids are paying $1200/mon to live in a city and do an internship. OP Your friend is crazy.

NP I assume your kid has running water and a toilet, right?

OP's kid and the other kid both have equal access to water and toilets. Did you miss that part or is your reading comprehension so poor that you didn't understand it?

You actually don't understand equality. Shed kid has to leave the building and walk outside to use the bathroom. That's not equal. What if the inside kids accidentally locked him out?

There are many circumstances of a room with shared bathroom and kitchen for students. It’s the price you pay for short term rentals in beach communities for very cheap.

How many instances of someone trying to make you rent the shed with no running water?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ahhh, the old hanger-ons. We've had a house in Kitty Hawk for 34 years and I can't even count how many Alexandria 'friends' thought they and their kids could help themselves to our beach house. It's something special, OP. We found that you just need to cut them off. They are like leeches.

The best part about this thread is the people getting all puffed up about a house in . . . Kitty Hawk.

The best part about this thread is that your reading comprehension skillls are so piss poor that you think OP has ID'd the town the house is in.

She hasn't.

Kitty Hawk was brought up by another poster in reference to their experience of owning a house and the attention it draws from free loaders. She was commiserating with OP. Nobody praised Kitty Hawk.

And to be clear- Kitty Hawk 34 years ago (when that poster bought their house) was absolutely something to get 'puffed up' about. My family has been visiting the Outer Banks since the 50s and up until about 1995 it was idyllic. Ever since, it has been invaded by trash from Jersey and NY and it has been thoroughly ruined. We've stopped going all together.

Right. The PP is getting all shirty about Kitty Hawk. It's something special, you see. But actually, as you admit, it's trash.

Are you doubling down on your poor reading skills? PP said it used to be special. PP never claimed it was currently special. The only poster claiming people claimed that is you.

OP called it special in her...OP. Dimwit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Three college aged boys are going to live for free for the summer and your son invited a friend to join them. Of course the implication is that it's free.

Also calling $333/month for a glorified shed with no running water or kitchen "nominal rent" is hilarious. That's highway robbery.

OP here. The friend would use the kitchen, baths, electricity, water, and gas like all the others and undoubtedly hang out in the house all the time he wasn't sleeping. The other boys are living for free because... their family owns the house.

Charging his friend is really low class. I can't believe they were going to make a lease, lol. Your son would tell you right away if they aren't taking care of the place, then you simply ask them to leave. I'm sure they have insurance as well.

The kids could make sure they leave it clean, replace supplies and something along those lines. That should be it, and don't withdraw the offer, that's even worse. Why punish the kids?? Withdraw the silly 3 mo lease!

Get a load of this! Now charging rent on a beach house is low class!

This lady needs to tell all the rental firms from Sea Island to Long Island that they are akin to used car salesmen.

You know what's low class? You.

No, dummy, charging rent for a shed/detached garage/outbuilding that has no plumbing and is in violoation of rental laws in that state is low class.

[Anonymous]

Coming late. I think charging a friend rent is really crappy, especially when they are sleeping in a shed. Forgetting about the ethics of it, renting the shed to the new kid makes them landlords and now opens them up to a lot of liability should the kid get hurt in the house because standard homeowner's insurance doesn't cover rental units. And the kid has tenant's rights if he's paying rent.