How is Sorority Rush going?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Went through sorority rush back in the 90s at an Ivy. The process was crushing to some of my friends who didn’t match at their preferred house. I got into my top choice house, but I found it remarkably unfulfilling. Many of my “sisters” are still friends and I see them getting together for wine tours and things on FB. I will encourage my DC to avoid schools with Greek Life or at least look for a low percentage who rush/pledge, because there can be a perception that you will be left out socially if it seems most of your friends are rushing. My friend group ended up being centered around a shared interest rather than just the alcohol and hook-up culture of Greek Life, so I spent less and less time at the sorority house until I deactivated entirely. I’d rather have my kid attend college and live at home than pay huge dollars to be on their own in that setting. The girls I met were smart and high achievers, but I realized I’m not a “joiner” just for a social scene. I’d rather get to know people in a more organic way. Good luck to your DC. Certain personality types are better cut out for Greek Life than others.

I have an almost identical story but my DD has her heart set on schools with big Greek systems and rushing so sometimes the kids don’t listen to their parents!

I think back and regret my Greek time. Yes, I had fun and made friends, but I wonder what I would have accomplished if I hadn't been focused on getting drunk at parties almost every night. My niece joined a sorority and promptly failed out of school. I won't be encouraging my kids to rush, I just think it is a fast ticket to wasting your time at college.

This is how I feel too. I did use it for leadership stuff, but also drank heavily Thursday-Saturday at a minimum. Have a kid at at T10 and she’s done more in her first semester it feels like than I did in 4 years. I went to a good school and I wasted a lot of it.

Stop sororities and fraternities tend to have higher GPA than rest of schools. If you were a pattern you would have partied. I had plenty of wild non greek friends and they partied more than me.
Just not my thing to drink. Those kids didn’t want to have to go to meetings and do extra philanthropy and grade pressure. My guess is you would have done worse because that is how you rolled.

Ding ding ding. On almost every campus, fraternity men and women have higher GPAs, greater campus involvement and better post-graduation outcome than GDIs. The people incessantly posting about Greek life being a fast lane to flunking out of school are likely just still bitter they never got a bid. And those who claim to have been in Greek life but now "see the light" either weren't in top houses (which tend to have the highest GPAs and occupy the loftiest campus leadership positions) or have turned on the system as adults because their kid didn't get a bid. Is Greek life perfect on every campus? No. Is it a huge net positive to the college experience? Absolutely.

Huge net positive other than hazing, sexual assault, and binge drinking, you mean? Fraternity men are three times more likely to sexually assault women than their non-affiliated classmates.

[Anonymous]

Hazing is illegal and many fraternities are completely getting rid of pledging to make emphasize no hazing. Are we on to trashing fraternities now? I am trying to keep up.

[Anonymous]

These "sorry you didn't get a bid" posters aren't really selling Greek life to those who aren't too familiar with it. Is is normal for grown ass adults to crow about their sorority membership from 30-some years ago? Are sororities that important for middle aged women? It's all very peculiar to those who went to schools without much of a Greek presence but now have kids at colleges that do. I am definitely not sold on the benefits of sororities. It seems like institutionalized mean-girl cattiness to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These "sorry you didn't get a bid" posters aren't really selling Greek life to those who aren't too familiar with it. Is is normal for grown ass adults to crow about their sorority membership from 30-some years ago? Are sororities that important for middle aged women? It's all very peculiar to those who went to schools without much of a Greek presence but now have kids at colleges that do. I am definitely not sold on the benefits of sororities. It seems like institutionalized mean-girl cattiness to me.

It’s peculiar to me as someone that was in a sorority too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These "sorry you didn't get a bid" posters aren't really selling Greek life to those who aren't too familiar with it. Is is normal for grown ass adults to crow about their sorority membership from 30-some years ago? Are sororities that important for middle aged women? It's all very peculiar to those who went to schools without much of a Greek presence but now have kids at colleges that do. I am definitely not sold on the benefits of sororities. It seems like institutionalized mean-girl cattiness to me.

Respectfully it’s the opposite

[Anonymous]

meaning those posters were never greek and most likely trolls. Every former greek person I know happily writes recs and gives advice and encourages kids to stay in rush even if your dream house drops you.

[Anonymous]

DD at Michigan is having a great rush experience. She's down to two good choices and is looking forward to a fun "pref/bid" weekend and learning where she'll land. No worries here about flunking out - these are smart, driven women and from what I can tell this is just another way to expand her circle (and solve the sophomore housing issue that exists in Ann Arbor!).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:meaning those posters were never greek and most likely trolls. Every former greek person I know happily writes recs and gives advice and encourages kids to stay in rush even if your dream house drops you.

I’ve written recs and given advice when asked, but I’ve my dead body would I ever make a fool of myself and say “sorry you didn’t get a bid”.

[Anonymous]

Pardon typos, I was on Panhellenic board and very, very involved. With adult eyes I see pros and cons and I have zero doubt it varies widely by house and school and even year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hazing is illegal and many fraternities are completely getting rid of pledging to make emphasize no hazing. Are we on to trashing fraternities now? I am trying to keep up.

The university can ban it all they want. It will still happen. I remember the frat parties I went to at a large state flagship, I'm a female. I don't want my son anywhere near them, but I will have no control over that. Don't believe your kids when they tell you their house is above all that. It isn't.

[Anonymous]

okay so why are you on this thread? This was asking about how rush went?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD at Michigan is having a great rush experience. She's down to two good choices and is looking forward to a fun "pref/bid" weekend and learning where she'll land. No worries here about flunking out - these are smart, driven women and from what I can tell this is just another way to expand her circle (and solve the sophomore housing issue that exists in Ann Arbor!).

Our kid is rushing now, also at a large state public. I like the way you put it “expand her circle”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Went through sorority rush back in the 90s at an Ivy. The process was crushing to some of my friends who didn’t match at their preferred house. I got into my top choice house, but I found it remarkably unfulfilling. Many of my “sisters” are still friends and I see them getting together for wine tours and things on FB. I will encourage my DC to avoid schools with Greek Life or at least look for a low percentage who rush/pledge, because there can be a perception that you will be left out socially if it seems most of your friends are rushing. My friend group ended up being centered around a shared interest rather than just the alcohol and hook-up culture of Greek Life, so I spent less and less time at the sorority house until I deactivated entirely. I’d rather have my kid attend college and live at home than pay huge dollars to be on their own in that setting. The girls I met were smart and high achievers, but I realized I’m not a “joiner” just for a social scene. I’d rather get to know people in a more organic way. Good luck to your DC. Certain personality types are better cut out for Greek Life than others.

I have an almost identical story but my DD has her heart set on schools with big Greek systems and rushing so sometimes the kids don’t listen to their parents!

I think back and regret my Greek time. Yes, I had fun and made friends, but I wonder what I would have accomplished if I hadn't been focused on getting drunk at parties almost every night. My niece joined a sorority and promptly failed out of school. I won't be encouraging my kids to rush, I just think it is a fast ticket to wasting your time at college.

This is how I feel too. I did use it for leadership stuff, but also drank heavily Thursday-Saturday at a minimum. Have a kid at at T10 and she’s done more in her first semester it feels like than I did in 4 years. I went to a good school and I wasted a lot of it.

Stop sororities and fraternities tend to have higher GPA than rest of schools. If you were a pattern you would have partied. I had plenty of wild non greek friends and they partied more than me.
Just not my thing to drink. Those kids didn’t want to have to go to meetings and do extra philanthropy and grade pressure. My guess is you would have done worse because that is how you rolled.

That’s not accurate. Some fraternities do well academically and some do poorly academically. It all depends. Fraternities are not all alike. Certain fraternities have massive alcohol and date rape problems. Others don’t.

The saddest sororities are the Southern ones that aren’t allowed to have the same freedoms as the fraternities. Men can’t go in their bedrooms. No alcohol allowed. They need to dress up at all times. Pink is a preferred color. They are segregated by race. The rigidity. It’s like they are setting themselves up to be a perfect hostess for their successful husbands who may or may not be faithful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hazing is illegal and many fraternities are completely getting rid of pledging to make emphasize no hazing. Are we on to trashing fraternities now? I am trying to keep up.

They are connected to each other

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Went through sorority rush back in the 90s at an Ivy. The process was crushing to some of my friends who didn’t match at their preferred house. I got into my top choice house, but I found it remarkably unfulfilling. Many of my “sisters” are still friends and I see them getting together for wine tours and things on FB. I will encourage my DC to avoid schools with Greek Life or at least look for a low percentage who rush/pledge, because there can be a perception that you will be left out socially if it seems most of your friends are rushing. My friend group ended up being centered around a shared interest rather than just the alcohol and hook-up culture of Greek Life, so I spent less and less time at the sorority house until I deactivated entirely. I’d rather have my kid attend college and live at home than pay huge dollars to be on their own in that setting. The girls I met were smart and high achievers, but I realized I’m not a “joiner” just for a social scene. I’d rather get to know people in a more organic way. Good luck to your DC. Certain personality types are better cut out for Greek Life than others.

I have an almost identical story but my DD has her heart set on schools with big Greek systems and rushing so sometimes the kids don’t listen to their parents!

I think back and regret my Greek time. Yes, I had fun and made friends, but I wonder what I would have accomplished if I hadn't been focused on getting drunk at parties almost every night. My niece joined a sorority and promptly failed out of school. I won't be encouraging my kids to rush, I just think it is a fast ticket to wasting your time at college.

This is how I feel too. I did use it for leadership stuff, but also drank heavily Thursday-Saturday at a minimum. Have a kid at at T10 and she’s done more in her first semester it feels like than I did in 4 years. I went to a good school and I wasted a lot of it.

Stop sororities and fraternities tend to have higher GPA than rest of schools. If you were a pattern you would have partied. I had plenty of wild non greek friends and they partied more than me.
Just not my thing to drink. Those kids didn’t want to have to go to meetings and do extra philanthropy and grade pressure. My guess is you would have done worse because that is how you rolled.

That’s not accurate. Some fraternities do well academically and some do poorly academically. It all depends. Fraternities are not all alike. Certain fraternities have massive alcohol and date rape problems. Others don’t.

The saddest sororities are the Southern ones that aren’t allowed to have the same freedoms as the fraternities. Men can’t go in their bedrooms. No alcohol allowed. They need to dress up at all times. Pink is a preferred color. They are segregated by race. The rigidity. It’s like they are setting themselves up to be a perfect hostess for their successful husbands who may or may not be faithful.

These 100%.vast majority of these girls in Southern sororities are just looking for a husband….