asshole-ish thing to do, or is there something about the value of pens that I don't know about?

[Anonymous]

I was in line at customs in Dulles recently. Two young men in front of me asked the man in front of them if they could borrow his pen to fill out a form. The man said something like, "actually, no, i can't, sorry, i really value this pen." I am a very non-confrontational person, typically, but I was so astonished by this that I actually spoke to the man. I pulled a pen from my purse and handed it to the young men and said something like "here, you can use my pen" and to the man I said "are you serious? you can't let them use your pen for 2 seconds to fill out this form?" He said something like "it's a very expensive pen! if you knew how expensive this pen was, you would understand." I said something like "Are you serious, we're in line here at customs, they aren't going anywhere, they aren't going to steal it." The man didn't say anything.

Do you think this guy was being a complete asshole?

[Anonymous]

No, I don't. What I do think was assholish was the response he got. They politely asked and he politely declined. They are then free to ask another person. What is rude is pestering the person who declined. He could have a fear of germs for all we know, the pen could cost $10,000, it really doesn't matter. It is his perogative.

[Anonymous]

I think that you were being a jerk to confront him like that. It's ok to say no to some things and he had a valid reason and wasn't rude about it.

[Anonymous]

It absolutely was asshole-ish what you did, OP. Actually, no "ish" about it - you acted like an asshole.

Wait, that's not what you meant? Urk. Make that clueless asshole.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, I don't. What I do think was assholish was the response he got. They politely asked and he politely declined. They are then free to ask another person. What is rude is pestering the person who declined. He could have a fear of germs for all we know, the pen could cost $10,000, it really doesn't matter. It is his perogative.

I agree with this response. I do think it's a little weird to carry around a pen that is apparently so expensive that it's un-loanable (what if it gets lost??), but as PP said, his right to politely say no. What you did then was indeed rude, even if you think it was deserved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, I don't. What I do think was assholish was the response he got. They politely asked and he politely declined. They are then free to ask another person. What is rude is pestering the person who declined. He could have a fear of germs for all we know, the pen could cost $10,000, it really doesn't matter. It is his perogative.

+1

You were the jerk here, OP.

[Anonymous]

My boss has a really expensive pen and every time he drops it it costs $100 to get the plastic case fixed. I would not own a pen like this, but if I did, I would not hand it to strangers standing on a hard surface.

[Anonymous]

No, but I think YOU were being an asshole for being a buttinski. The gracious and appropriate thing to do was provide a pen for the travelers. Full stop. Not start something with Traveler #1.

The pen was important and him and he didn't feel comfortable sharing it. He was honest about that. Maybe he's lent out a pen before and it never made it back to him. Maybe he worried those travelers would then pass the pen along to someone else who needed it. Maybe it was a $400 pen. Maybe it was a gift from someone dear to him.Maybe he's a germaphobe. Or maybe he's just an asshole. Who knows?
You were out of line.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Wow...surprised about the responses, but, good to know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, I don't. What I do think was assholish was the response he got. They politely asked and he politely declined. They are then free to ask another person. What is rude is pestering the person who declined. He could have a fear of germs for all we know, the pen could cost $10,000, it really doesn't matter. It is his perogative.

Completely agree. First, some pens really are expensive, but, at the end of the day, it's not just about money. No one is under any obligation to lend their property to strangers as a common courtesy. It was not an emergency of any kind, so it was the man's right to politely decline the request.

[Anonymous]

OP here again - even if you think I was an asshole for saying something to the man, do you think that the man was being a bit of one, too, in not allowing someone to borrow his pen under those circumstances?

[Anonymous]

If it was a Montblanc pen, he could have easily spent several hundred dollars on it. You were the asshole, OP. Not him.

http://www.montblanc.com/

[Anonymous]

Even if it was an expensive pen, did he really think that the young men were going to break it during their 2 minutes of use while standing right next to the pen-owner?

[Anonymous]

OP, you are a complete busybody and rude. What is astonishing is that you can't see that and had to post here on DCUM about it. Who's the "asshole"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here again - even if you think I was an asshole for saying something to the man, do you think that the man was being a bit of one, too, in not allowing someone to borrow his pen under those circumstances?

NO. Let me repeat what an earlier poster said - no one is under any obligation to loan anything to anyone.