HS seniors - whose kid's friend group is imploding?
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Anonymous
Did you go to high school around here? |
Anonymous
Oh yes. This is happening to my kid’s friend as well. I don’t say a word, but much of this is predictable. |
Anonymous
Not the PP but responding to PP: I graduated from HS over 30 years ago. In spring of my senior year I chose to completely break friendship with my then two best friends. This has been happening across time. |
Anonymous
| I went to school around here and other than one friend who tried to steal a boyfriend no one had any drama in my circle. We all stayed friends with her too and the guy had enough respect to just tell her no so her manipulations didnt last long. Most kids at my school had integrity and side activities they were really into plus they had jobs and no tutors or family legacies and most were college bound. Some kids had died from illness, drugs, or car crashes and life felt precious. We all worked hard and enjoyed each other. No cell phones so we only had each other. |
Anonymous
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I went to high school around here and my group of female friends was the best one I’ve ever had in my life. No drama, all love and support. Really solidified senior year. (Was not so lucky in college, unfortunately.)
I do remember occasionally girls that had been cast off from the more popular groups would hang out with us and say how envious they were that we were all actually good friends, because things were not at all what they seemed among their groups. That’s stuck with me through the years as I’ve watched my own teen DD navigate high school friendships. Fortunately she seems to have found some likeminded low-drama nice kids. |
Anonymous
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Were these true friends who she truly liked or a friend group formed out of necessity (eg yoi “need to be in a friend group)?
If any are true friends perhaps she should work on repairing with them, but mainly focus on the other friends you mention in other groups or as individuals. I have a 10th grader who is going through friend group drama, her being excluded — when she stepped away girls freaked out asked “are you leaving out friend group”. In her case this was largely a group formed like picking teams in elementary school (eg we need 5th) |
Anonymous
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I think a lot of the friend groups that are carryovers from elementary school were actually created by parents. Once the kids decide they want to lead their own lives, the friend groups split up. Sometimes this happens in middle school, sometimes it takes until high school.
But there are definitely girls deciding who is in and who is out, including boys. |
Anonymous
| The worst thing you can do is push your kid to be popular, to hang out with the popular group. They can get really hurt emotionally by those groups. |
Anonymous
| This happened to my niece. It was painful at the time. She’s now in her late 20s, had great college experiences, and is still friendly with a handful of the imploded group. But, at the time, it was bad. |
Anonymous
| Kids need to have friends in school but never ONLY friends from school. The best thing you can do for your kids when you have the influence is to let them have a wide friend (and family if age-appropriate cousins) network. |
Anonymous
OP here. Yes, partly. Maybe you're a parent of one of the girls involved in this drama. lol I think it's so sad that a boy is coming between what was once good friendships. |
Anonymous
| So sorry this happening. You and your daughter are not alone. I don’t know how it ends but hoping there is a light at the end of tunnel soon. |