Social fit vs academics

[Anonymous]

I sent my sons to different high schools bc they are different kids and each school fit them better. 100% it was the best decision for them and our family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How much did your family weigh social fit and academics in the private school search? Just some background, 2 of our kids are athletic and social. One isn't as academic as the other, but we have a third kid who is not athletic at all and is smart, quirky, and introverted. I know social fit is the utmost importance for this kid and I would hate to have her an in environment full of athletic extroverts. Finding a school that fits all three seems impossible. We feel like we are in over our heads because the more academic schools are too intense for one kid and not sporty enough. And the more sporty schools may not a social fit for the quirky kid. Any suggestions?

Both. A happy child learns better.

[Anonymous]

Social fit first.

Academics will follow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Academics as parents your job is to give your kid the best education possible.

Get some parenting classes your kids deserve better than your stupidity.

No one I know is worried about "social fit" when picking a school. That is absurd. Except for new money wanna bees.

Sigh. Reading comprehension is not your strong suit. How embarrassing. The question isn’t about social engineering, but where a quirky kid will feel most comfortable. OP, go by social fit. A kid that is smart can excel anywhere. Colleges look at a child and rigor in context of the school. PP’s response is really weird because everyone looks at fit and academics. That is why there are so many successful different types of schools in our area. I have a senior at a DC private school and fit was very important.

[Anonymous]

Social fit is very important. We've been touring high schools and I think the academics at every school we have been to will be 100% fine. Sure there are some difference but overall I'm not concerned about the academic variations because every school we have visited will prepare my kid for college. There are larger variations in things like transportation options, sports teams availability, extra-circulars and the general vibe of the school. Those will probably weigh heavily in our decision. I would not force my kids to go to the same school if it was clear it was not a good fit for one of them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Social fit first.

Academics will follow.

+1

[Anonymous]

Maret may fit the bill for all three. Because of the small size, they love three sport athletes. The academics can be more or less challenging depending on the course selection and quirky would be fine.

[Anonymous]

My kid is in a school where she is struggling socially but thriving academically. No friend group, but the teachers love her. She will find her people in college. We have no regrets as we believe the situation would have been the same anywhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid is in a school where she is struggling socially but thriving academically. No friend group, but the teachers love her. She will find her people in college. We have no regrets as we believe the situation would have been the same anywhere.

That's what I'm afraid of happening for my quirky kid. She doesn't really have friends now and I don't want that for her.

[Anonymous]

T

Anonymous wrote: Maret may fit the bill for all three. Because of the small size, they love three sport athletes. The academics can be more or less challenging depending on the course selection and quirky would be fine.

Oh and they had 40 families leave this year including 20 from 8th grade so there will be room for sure! Talking about a school with issues!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid is in a school where she is struggling socially but thriving academically. No friend group, but the teachers love her. She will find her people in college. We have no regrets as we believe the situation would have been the same anywhere.

Does the “we” include your daughter?

[Anonymous]

Looking over this thread, there is a majority concerned about the emotional well-being of their kids and the consequent (for most) barriers to learning that can come up there. A few aren't, and I feel sorry for those kids who now feel like no one is going to listen to them when they are hurting.

That's where teenage tragedies and lifelong emotional damage can come from. The research on it is extensive.

Kudos to everyone who cares.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Choose different schools for your different kids. They each need something different -- academic and social/cultural fit is important.

I only have two kids, but they've attended different schools their whole lives because they have different needs.

This is how it’s done here. It’s crazy but that’s what it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is in a school where she is struggling socially but thriving academically. No friend group, but the teachers love her. She will find her people in college. We have no regrets as we believe the situation would have been the same anywhere.

That's what I'm afraid of happening for my quirky kid. She doesn't really have friends now and I don't want that for her.

You should look into Madeira. Very socially accepting kids across the board. My daughter has had three really great years and is sad that she only gets one more.

[Anonymous]

Not everything you learn in high school is academics.

An important part of the experience is learning social skills and how to fit in. Some environments are going to be easier for some kids because the student bodies are more like them.