Social fit vs academics

[Anonymous]

How much did your family weigh social fit and academics in the private school search? Just some background, 2 of our kids are athletic and social. One isn't as academic as the other, but we have a third kid who is not athletic at all and is smart, quirky, and introverted. I know social fit is the utmost importance for this kid and I would hate to have her an in environment full of athletic extroverts. Finding a school that fits all three seems impossible. We feel like we are in over our heads because the more academic schools are too intense for one kid and not sporty enough. And the more sporty schools may not a social fit for the quirky kid. Any suggestions?

[Anonymous]

Choose different schools for your different kids. They each need something different -- academic and social/cultural fit is important.

I only have two kids, but they've attended different schools their whole lives because they have different needs.

[Anonymous]

Academics as parents your job is to give your kid the best education possible.

Get some parenting classes your kids deserve better than your stupidity.

No one I know is worried about "social fit" when picking a school. That is absurd. Except for new money wanna bees.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Academics as parents your job is to give your kid the best education possible.

Get some parenting classes your kids deserve better than your stupidity.

No one I know is worried about "social fit" when picking a school. That is absurd. Except for new money wanna bees.

Would you send a quirky nerdy kid to Bullis or St. John's? They definitely wouldn't fit in amongst the jocks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Academics as parents your job is to give your kid the best education possible.

Get some parenting classes your kids deserve better than your stupidity.

No one I know is worried about "social fit" when picking a school. That is absurd. Except for new money wanna bees.

Would you send a quirky nerdy kid to Bullis or St. John's? They definitely wouldn't fit in amongst the jocks.

Mine went to SJC and did just fine.

That said, social fit is just as important as academics. If a student is very unhappy, they cannot access the curriculum, no matter how great it is. Happy students learn better.

[Anonymous]

10:31 is an idiot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Academics as parents your job is to give your kid the best education possible.

Get some parenting classes your kids deserve better than your stupidity.

No one I know is worried about "social fit" when picking a school. That is absurd. Except for new money wanna bees.

This is bad advice.

It is definitely important to consider fit and the full environment when choosing a school. OP, if your two kids have very different and conflicting needs, you may have to consider two separate schools, or else compromise in some areas.

[Anonymous]

10:31 is an idiot.

[Anonymous]

There is more to social fit than a kid's top line trait. I would never advise sending a kid to a school where they would be socially uncomfortable just because you perceive the academics to be better.

[Anonymous]

St. Andrew's and Bullis? Or maybe Field/Burke and a choice for your athletic kids?

[Anonymous]

Who said quirky kids are not at Bullis? Go take a tour. You'll see they are there in droves!

[Anonymous]

Also agree that if possible you may need to look at different schools. I do believe social fit is important to a good learning experience and you may not find a match for all three kids at one place.

That having been said, touring and shadow days are the best way to get a sense. I think most start offering tours in the early fall and dates should be on websites soon. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Right fit for each kid, in terms of school culture, school academics and relevant activities, and social fit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Academics as parents your job is to give your kid the best education possible.

Get some parenting classes your kids deserve better than your stupidity.

No one I know is worried about "social fit" when picking a school. That is absurd. Except for new money wanna bees.

You’re gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Academics as parents your job is to give your kid the best education possible.

Get some parenting classes your kids deserve better than your stupidity.

No one I know is worried about "social fit" when picking a school. That is absurd. Except for new money wanna bees.

I could not disagree more. You can get great academics pretty much anywhere or supplement a bit. You cannot undo the bullying and crush to self-esteem that can come from a bad social fit. It can ruin a kid. If a kid is psychologically damaged from social trauma, it really doesn't matter how good the academics might have been.