Pendente Lite Guideline vs Actual Spousal Support (in VA) -- How did it compare in your case? SAHM

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

after someone marries, you cannot make them work.

You can’t make them work before you’re married either. In both cases your choice is only whether or not you remain associated with that person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

after someone marries, you cannot make them work.

yeah. a lot of the time it wasn't a choice they both made---they got the ring, popped out a kid and then she says 'I'm out of the workforce'. Most people don't have a clear "I'm never working again once I pop out the first kid" (even if that was their secret intention when looking for a man as the plan).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

[Anonymous]

And I work and commute as a single parent which takes me about 10 hours out of the day. Then there are afterschool activities. Then homework. Plus laundry and cleaning, and cooking. Plus bills. Plus maintenance. It's never ending.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

You do your teenagers laundry? They don’t do it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

Different PP single dad. No way in hell does laundry take 60 minutes a day. Are you standing there watching the clothes tumble in the dryer like Rain Man or something? Each bedroom has a laundry basket, you take it to the washing machine and put them in, that's a couple of minutes tops. Less than a minute to put them in the dryer. Then five minutes to put them away (if it's a teenager they should do this not you). I don't even run a laundry load every day, two kids and I don't generate that many dirty clothes. And yes both my kids do sports.

I cook meals for everyone and that might take 15 minutes per meal.

Do vacuuming and dusting and yard work on the weekends.

This is not an "8 hour a day full-time job".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

I've been doing my own laundry since I was 12. I've been doing my laundry + children's for nearly 10 years. I think 10 minutes total labor time to do a wash is about right. Kids need laundry done 1-2 time per week. I need my laundry 1-2 times per week. On a slow week I doubt I spend more than 20 minutes total on laundry.

Put laundry in basket and take downstairs: 2 minutes
Start machine and put clothes inside: 90 second
Move laundry to dryer: 1 minute
Check dryer: 1 minute
Move from dryer to basket and deliver upstairs: 2 minutes
Fold laundry: 2-6 minutes

Total: about 10 minutes

I can also multitask by folding laundry while something is cooking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

I've been doing my own laundry since I was 12. I've been doing my laundry + children's for nearly 10 years. I think 10 minutes total labor time to do a wash is about right. Kids need laundry done 1-2 time per week. I need my laundry 1-2 times per week. On a slow week I doubt I spend more than 20 minutes total on laundry.

Put laundry in basket and take downstairs: 2 minutes
Start machine and put clothes inside: 90 second
Move laundry to dryer: 1 minute
Check dryer: 1 minute
Move from dryer to basket and deliver upstairs: 2 minutes
Fold laundry: 2-6 minutes

Total: about 10 minutes

I can also multitask by folding laundry while something is cooking.

Well good for you. The rest of the world does not fold and put away laundry in 2-6 minutes. The average time is 20 minutes per google just to fold. And my kids do their laundry a lot or at least put it away all the time but that itself takes them about 15 minutes to put away. It depends on their other workload. Sorry we aren't robots.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

I've been doing my own laundry since I was 12. I've been doing my laundry + children's for nearly 10 years. I think 10 minutes total labor time to do a wash is about right. Kids need laundry done 1-2 time per week. I need my laundry 1-2 times per week. On a slow week I doubt I spend more than 20 minutes total on laundry.

Put laundry in basket and take downstairs: 2 minutes
Start machine and put clothes inside: 90 second
Move laundry to dryer: 1 minute
Check dryer: 1 minute
Move from dryer to basket and deliver upstairs: 2 minutes
Fold laundry: 2-6 minutes

Total: about 10 minutes

I can also multitask by folding laundry while something is cooking.

Well good for you. The rest of the world does not fold and put away laundry in 2-6 minutes. The average time is 20 minutes per google just to fold. And my kids do their laundry a lot or at least put it away all the time but that itself takes them about 15 minutes to put away. It depends on their other workload. Sorry we aren't robots.

I am a working mom and a former SAHM to one teenager. Laundry for each of us accumulates in baskets in the closets; and I run the laundry once a week. It takes about 90 min of my time to sort out the larger (weekly) load and put it back into shelves. not sure why would anyone do laundry every day.

That being said, now that I am in the "virtual office" making my own money, my day is much easier than when I was driving my son for after school activities. It was super boring: I was like a secretary for my wealthy exH, he constantly renovated properties and I was meeting with contractors. Also, organized all the travel (5-6 times/year), social gatherings at home (only his birthday celebration would be a party for 20+ persons, catering, renting a venue etc). It was like an organizer job. Cooking takes longer than 1 hours if it's a coupe course menu for dinner and a full breakfast.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

I've been doing my own laundry since I was 12. I've been doing my laundry + children's for nearly 10 years. I think 10 minutes total labor time to do a wash is about right. Kids need laundry done 1-2 time per week. I need my laundry 1-2 times per week. On a slow week I doubt I spend more than 20 minutes total on laundry.

Put laundry in basket and take downstairs: 2 minutes
Start machine and put clothes inside: 90 second
Move laundry to dryer: 1 minute
Check dryer: 1 minute
Move from dryer to basket and deliver upstairs: 2 minutes
Fold laundry: 2-6 minutes

Total: about 10 minutes

I can also multitask by folding laundry while something is cooking.

Well good for you. The rest of the world does not fold and put away laundry in 2-6 minutes. The average time is 20 minutes per google just to fold. And my kids do their laundry a lot or at least put it away all the time but that itself takes them about 15 minutes to put away. It depends on their other workload. Sorry we aren't robots.

I am a working mom and a former SAHM to one teenager. Laundry for each of us accumulates in baskets in the closets; and I run the laundry once a week. It takes about 90 min of my time to sort out the larger (weekly) load and put it back into shelves. not sure why would anyone do laundry every day.

That being said, now that I am in the "virtual office" making my own money, my day is much easier than when I was driving my son for after school activities. It was super boring: I was like a secretary for my wealthy exH, he constantly renovated properties and I was meeting with contractors. Also, organized all the travel (5-6 times/year), social gatherings at home (only his birthday celebration would be a party for 20+ persons, catering, renting a venue etc). It was like an organizer job. Cooking takes longer than 1 hours if it's a coupe course menu for dinner and a full breakfast.

Well there are four of us and often some of the kids need two loads especially in the summer, so if it isn't every day it's every other day. At least four times a week. So it takes you 90 minutes and the other guy 10. It takes me 60 minutes each time I do it not including the time it's just running. Seems like I'm within the ballpark.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

I've been doing my own laundry since I was 12. I've been doing my laundry + children's for nearly 10 years. I think 10 minutes total labor time to do a wash is about right. Kids need laundry done 1-2 time per week. I need my laundry 1-2 times per week. On a slow week I doubt I spend more than 20 minutes total on laundry.

Put laundry in basket and take downstairs: 2 minutes
Start machine and put clothes inside: 90 second
Move laundry to dryer: 1 minute
Check dryer: 1 minute
Move from dryer to basket and deliver upstairs: 2 minutes
Fold laundry: 2-6 minutes

Total: about 10 minutes

I can also multitask by folding laundry while something is cooking.

Well good for you. The rest of the world does not fold and put away laundry in 2-6 minutes. The average time is 20 minutes per google just to fold. And my kids do their laundry a lot or at least put it away all the time but that itself takes them about 15 minutes to put away. It depends on their other workload. Sorry we aren't robots.

I am a working mom and a former SAHM to one teenager. Laundry for each of us accumulates in baskets in the closets; and I run the laundry once a week. It takes about 90 min of my time to sort out the larger (weekly) load and put it back into shelves. not sure why would anyone do laundry every day.

That being said, now that I am in the "virtual office" making my own money, my day is much easier than when I was driving my son for after school activities. It was super boring: I was like a secretary for my wealthy exH, he constantly renovated properties and I was meeting with contractors. Also, organized all the travel (5-6 times/year), social gatherings at home (only his birthday celebration would be a party for 20+ persons, catering, renting a venue etc). It was like an organizer job. Cooking takes longer than 1 hours if it's a coupe course menu for dinner and a full breakfast.

Well there are four of us and often some of the kids need two loads especially in the summer, so if it isn't every day it's every other day. At least four times a week. So it takes you 90 minutes and the other guy 10. It takes me 60 minutes each time I do it not including the time it's just running. Seems like I'm within the ballpark.

When I was SAHM my day was certainly very busy, not less than now working in the office. These were just different things

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

If it takes you 60 minutes every day to do laundry, you are probably a terrible sahm. Most people do a household of laundry in less than 30 minutes a week. If my sah spouse complained about laundry taking them this long, i would suggest if not insist that they go back to work because they are not a good fit for staying home.

Have you thought about going back to work since you're so bad at keeping house?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

I've been doing my own laundry since I was 12. I've been doing my laundry + children's for nearly 10 years. I think 10 minutes total labor time to do a wash is about right. Kids need laundry done 1-2 time per week. I need my laundry 1-2 times per week. On a slow week I doubt I spend more than 20 minutes total on laundry.

Put laundry in basket and take downstairs: 2 minutes
Start machine and put clothes inside: 90 second
Move laundry to dryer: 1 minute
Check dryer: 1 minute
Move from dryer to basket and deliver upstairs: 2 minutes
Fold laundry: 2-6 minutes

Total: about 10 minutes

I can also multitask by folding laundry while something is cooking.

Well good for you. The rest of the world does not fold and put away laundry in 2-6 minutes. The average time is 20 minutes per google just to fold. And my kids do their laundry a lot or at least put it away all the time but that itself takes them about 15 minutes to put away. It depends on their other workload. Sorry we aren't robots.

I am a working mom and a former SAHM to one teenager. Laundry for each of us accumulates in baskets in the closets; and I run the laundry once a week. It takes about 90 min of my time to sort out the larger (weekly) load and put it back into shelves. not sure why would anyone do laundry every day.

That being said, now that I am in the "virtual office" making my own money, my day is much easier than when I was driving my son for after school activities. It was super boring: I was like a secretary for my wealthy exH, he constantly renovated properties and I was meeting with contractors. Also, organized all the travel (5-6 times/year), social gatherings at home (only his birthday celebration would be a party for 20+ persons, catering, renting a venue etc). It was like an organizer job. Cooking takes longer than 1 hours if it's a coupe course menu for dinner and a full breakfast.

Well there are four of us and often some of the kids need two loads especially in the summer, so if it isn't every day it's every other day. At least four times a week. So it takes you 90 minutes and the other guy 10. It takes me 60 minutes each time I do it not including the time it's just running. Seems like I'm within the ballpark.

How the hell do your kids generate two loads of laundry? My kids generate one load a week including dirty sports clothes.

But anyway if you haven't taught your kids to do their own laundry then you suck at parenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!

Yikes at this thread. Never give up your job to stay home, ladies! You need to look out for number one.

Well, the problem is, the SAHM role does not get enough respect. Think of the myriad jobs a SAHM does and consider all the people you hire to replace what a SAHM does. I sometimes feel as though the feminist movement eliminated SAHM as a choice for women in that the concept of alimony seems to have gone away. IMO this role should be a viable option for a man or a woman and it should be protected under the law. A woman or man dosesn't stay home with the kids without the consent of the other partner. That was a choice that partner also made, and the consequences of one partner out of the workforce should not be a burden only that one person has to bear.

People always say this. How you you say it with a straight face, when SAHMs get alimony, while WOHMs (who statistically do many of the things SAHMs do, while also working) get nothing?

Exactly. Once the child is in school what's the purpose of a woman staying home all day? To cook and clean? I don't get it, it just sounds like pure laziness to me. It's all good until the husband leaves or wants a divorce and then they complain about not having a career. Smh.

I've written this before and been shouted at here. I've been a single dad for nearly a decade. Daily cooking and cleaning with teenagers around is at most 90 minutes a day, probably less. Might have to catch up a bit on the weekend with some laundry or vacuuming. No maid or cook in my home, or grocery delivery or lawn service.

There is no way. What do you kids do? Just eat the same food and clothes? Do they do sports or other activities with uniforms? Do you order food already packaged? Laundry alone takes me about 60 minutes a day. Maybe it's not just me, but it takes 60 minutes of actual work. Gathering the clothes, running the wash, running the dryer, folding, and putting away. 60 minutes easily 1 load. Meals another 45 minutes between food prep serving, and cleaning up. Plus time to eat and shop.

If it takes you 60 minutes every day to do laundry, you are probably a terrible sahm. Most people do a household of laundry in less than 30 minutes a week. If my sah spouse complained about laundry taking them this long, i would suggest if not insist that they go back to work because they are not a good fit for staying home.

Have you thought about going back to work since you're so bad at keeping house?

I'm not a SAHM.