2nd baby shower for unwed mother.

[Anonymous]

She is 21 yrs. old and this is her second child. She had the first three years ago with her married boyfriend. I went to that shower because I wanted to help her out. Well, she got rid of all of her baby stuff, crib, high chair, car seat etc. She said she was done having kids. Well, I just got an invite another babyshower for her. I guess she is six months pregnant and again she isn't married to or even dating the father. I called her mom and asked what she needed, and her mom said EVERYTHING!! She even directed me to her registry and said that a car seat was most needed. I don't want to judge, and I will send her a gift, but do you think a baby shower is really appropriate?

[Anonymous]

You are judging and the baby shower is not up to you. You are not throwing it for her.

[Anonymous]

It's totally inappropriate in so many levels. Why even send a gift? Maybe she will stop having kids if she doesn't get new stuff.

[Anonymous]

I would judge.

I would not go. This is insane. Really feel bad for those kids, of course. It must be tough to start life with such a birdbrain for a mother.

[Anonymous]

Don't go but send a nice gift.

[Anonymous]

If you care about the girl or her mom, then go to the shower with good grace. If you don't, or can't withhold feeling judgmental, then don't go but send a gift if you can afford it. A car seat may be too much for you and your relationship to the new mom, but there are less expensive items you can give. (Please do not include a box of condoms or a book on methods of contraception!) And maybe you can ask around among the people you know to see if anyone has a gently used car seat they wouldn't mind donating.

[Anonymous]

What does being married have to do with it? Is it 1950?
She needs stuff for the baby so the shower would be useful....don't you think?

[Anonymous]

I don't think the shower is appropriate but maybe a Target gift card would be a good gift so she can get diapers, etc.

[Anonymous]

think about the baby, OP. second the target gift card.

[Anonymous]

If the Mom could use the items, I would send a gift. While I'm pro-choice, I realize that some people aren't, so I don't judge others who decide to keep their child instead of aborting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the Mom could use the items, I would send a gift. While I'm pro-choice, I realize that some people aren't, so I don't judge others who decide to keep their child instead of aborting.

What? Why would you even say something like that?

What a cold person you must be to be so flippant about killing a baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the Mom could use the items, I would send a gift. While I'm pro-choice, I realize that some people aren't, so I don't judge others who decide to keep their child instead of aborting.

What? Why would you even say something like that?

What a cold person you must be to be so flippant about killing a baby.

WTF are you talking about? Read it again, without the hysterics dumbass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What does being married have to do with it? Is it 1950?
She needs stuff for the baby so the shower would be useful....don't you think?

Oh, please, here we go again. The lunatics are out tonight....

[Anonymous]

Go, don't go. Just don't waste so much time over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does being married have to do with it? Is it 1950?
She needs stuff for the baby so the shower would be useful....don't you think?

Oh, please, here we go again. The lunatics are out tonight....

This seems like the opposite of lunacy to me. PP is very readonable in tone and message.