Top Tier Boarding school vs. TJ

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What idiot even brings TJ up in a discussion of elite, long standing, private schools like Exeter, Andover, Groton, Choate, St Paul's, STA and Sidwell? What a joke. TJ is an incredible, fantastic PUBLIC school for brilliant, hard working middle class and recently-arrived UMC kids. TJ is great for those folks but its comparing apples and oranges. Not even the same universe.

You are the idiot. There is only one universe idiot. Not in the same league, not at the same level etc. maybe ok but not "Not in the same universe". See the logic (or lack thereof) of people putting down TJ.

This. Plus it's a sad worldview where kids from 2 professional parent families with graduate degrees (noting that TJ is 1.5% FARMS) are "middle class" or even "recently arrived upper middle class." No wonder the actual middle class hates the 1% so much. Apparently, the 1% looks at parents who are a doctor and a federal lawyer spending 750k-a million dollars on a house who pour the kind of money into kid enrichment that TJ parents do (private music lessons, travel sports teams, tutors, etc) and think-- yeah, that's the struggle of an average, middle class American. And we all wonder how Trump got a foothold. What a joke.

I agree this attitude that I'n seeing on this board is absolutely unbelievable to me. And one that I naively thought had become extinct a few decades ago.

Well aren't you the dummy then. Some of you really do live with your heads in the sand. You probably think racism and sexism and classism are gone too.

Seriously, what folks now call the 1% is basically just the same old upper class moneyed folks (WASPs) but now they have a little more color (no longer just WASPs) and much more worldliness and money thanks to our global economy. For the most part they remain the same with the same customs and cultures and idiosyncraties one of which is boarding school and top notch private schools. The fact that you are so unaware of this leaves me to believe you dont get out much beyond your suburban NOVA world. And that my friend is exactly the point so many have been trying to make on here.

No one doubts the wonders of a TJ education or that those admitted are incredibly smart and forward thinkning and hard working and impressive. The point however is that is not enough to launch one into the highest levels of power and prestige and life. Going from TJ to Harvard, Princeton or Yale is not, and likely never will be, the same thing as going from a top boarding or private school to HPY. The final results upon graduation will not be the same. The life styles and opportunites and open doors will not be the same for those two very different sets of graduates. Those two paths do not equal the same outcome in life, not even close. There is just flat out more out there for the latter, the kids from the boarding school/elite private school world. More doors will be open, more opportunites will be available, and it will all be easier and smoother.

Life isnt fair is a mantra my mother repeated frequently when I was growing up. She was never talking about the greater world, more just the size of one's slice of cake but, it is still a very good and very true lesson. And having a high IQ or perfect SAT or going to TJ doesnt suddenly make life fair. Certain types of people, the rich and powerful ,will always be ahead of the game. Hell, they run the game. THAT is what boarding school is about.[/quote]

Well our kid goes to one of those boarding schools but gets FA, and they are incredibly generous with their FA. DC gets along well with them and they seem to accept DC, although his path in life going forward will probably be more akin to a graduate of a good NOVA high school, since we are not rich.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What idiot even brings TJ up in a discussion of elite, long standing, private schools like Exeter, Andover, Groton, Choate, St Paul's, STA and Sidwell? What a joke. TJ is an incredible, fantastic PUBLIC school for brilliant, hard working middle class and recently-arrived UMC kids. TJ is great for those folks but its comparing apples and oranges. Not even the same universe.

You are the idiot. There is only one universe idiot. Not in the same league, not at the same level etc. maybe ok but not "Not in the same universe". See the logic (or lack thereof) of people putting down TJ.

This. Plus it's a sad worldview where kids from 2 professional parent families with graduate degrees (noting that TJ is 1.5% FARMS) are "middle class" or even "recently arrived upper middle class." No wonder the actual middle class hates the 1% so much. Apparently, the 1% looks at parents who are a doctor and a federal lawyer spending 750k-a million dollars on a house who pour the kind of money into kid enrichment that TJ parents do (private music lessons, travel sports teams, tutors, etc) and think-- yeah, that's the struggle of an average, middle class American. And we all wonder how Trump got a foothold. What a joke.

I agree this attitude that I'n seeing on this board is absolutely unbelievable to me. And one that I naively thought had become extinct a few decades ago.

Well aren't you the dummy then. Some of you really do live with your heads in the sand. You probably think racism and sexism and classism are gone too.

Seriously, what folks now call the 1% is basically just the same old upper class moneyed folks (WASPs) but now they have a little more color (no longer just WASPs) and much more worldliness and money thanks to our global economy. For the most part they remain the same with the same customs and cultures and idiosyncraties one of which is boarding school and top notch private schools. The fact that you are so unaware of this leaves me to believe you dont get out much beyond your suburban NOVA world. And that my friend is exactly the point so many have been trying to make on here.

No one doubts the wonders of a TJ education or that those admitted are incredibly smart and forward thinkning and hard working and impressive. The point however is that is not enough to launch one into the highest levels of power and prestige and life. Going from TJ to Harvard, Princeton or Yale is not, and likely never will be, the same thing as going from a top boarding or private school to HPY. The final results upon graduation will not be the same. The life styles and opportunites and open doors will not be the same for those two very different sets of graduates. Those two paths do not equal the same outcome in life, not even close. There is just flat out more out there for the latter, the kids from the boarding school/elite private school world. More doors will be open, more opportunites will be available, and it will all be easier and smoother.

Life isnt fair is a mantra my mother repeated frequently when I was growing up. She was never talking about the greater world, more just the size of one's slice of cake but, it is still a very good and very true lesson. And having a high IQ or perfect SAT or going to TJ doesnt suddenly make life fair. Certain types of people, the rich and powerful ,will always be ahead of the game. Hell, they run the game. THAT is what boarding school is about.

What the hell? If both types of kids end up at Harvard, how will their outcomes in life be "not even close"? And how do financial aid Boarding School kids fit into this picture?

[Anonymous]

Kids at elite boarding schools on FA will have better opportunities and the better connections than if they had gone to a public magnet like TJ. First, they will have the right connections. Second they will "get it" having been exposed to those people, their culture and their world.

[Anonymous]

Who cares? Do what works best for you and your family. Obviously TJ has great results as do the upper tier boarding schools. Kids from these high schools probably become friends and/or join the same activities or greek groups.

The only thing that annoys me about TJ is the amount of funding they get as opposed to base schools.

[Anonymous]

To the extent that BS kids who subsequently graduate from HYPS do better than public school kids who subsequently graduate from HYPS the difference isn't because they went to BS (or acquired the exceptional education or social sophistication it supposedly provides) it's because they are members of extraordinary wealthy families.

So unless your kid is going to inherit extraordinary family wealth, s/he won't be reaping the kinds of benefits PPs attribute to a BS education.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To the extent that BS kids who subsequently graduate from HYPS do better than public school kids who subsequently graduate from HYPS the difference isn't because they went to BS (or acquired the exceptional education or social sophistication it supposedly provides) it's because they are members of extraordinary wealthy families.

So unless your kid is going to inherit extraordinary family wealth, s/he won't be reaping the kinds of benefits PPs attribute to a BS education.

This thread has piqued my interest. Why do extraordinarily rich families with multi-generational wealth send their kids to boarding school instead of public school? I know that seems dumb, but I'm curious. Also obviously given the low FARMS rate at TJ, most families are not living below the poverty line. They have a different kind of wealth though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:the kids at the top boarding schools have a lot less pressure because they all have a safety net.
Most if the kids from TJ will have to make it on their own.

+ and family connections.

TJ kids maybe as capable as BS kids but TJ parents cannot provide the same level of support BS parents can.

You win. You're better than us just as capable but not old money upper middle class families.

the game was lost before you started... before you got married, before you had your kid. you just didn't know it.

That's it. This Republican has officially decided to turn Democrat.

? You think one's better than the other?

[Anonymous]

I went to one of these boarding schools. They do not turn you into the 1% (or .01%). If you were already in that class when you arrived then you will live a rarefied life, and if you were a regular middle class kid who did well and went to Brown then your life will be much like regular public school middle class kids who did well and went to Brown. This is my lived experience anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I went to one of these boarding schools. They do not turn you into the 1% (or .01%). If you were already in that class when you arrived then you will live a rarefied life, and if you were a regular middle class kid who did well and went to Brown then your life will be much like regular public school middle class kids who did well and went to Brown. This is my lived experience anyway.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To the extent that BS kids who subsequently graduate from HYPS do better than public school kids who subsequently graduate from HYPS the difference isn't because they went to BS (or acquired the exceptional education or social sophistication it supposedly provides) it's because they are members of extraordinary wealthy families.

So unless your kid is going to inherit extraordinary family wealth, s/he won't be reaping the kinds of benefits PPs attribute to a BS education.

Exactly. And if these extraordinarily rich kids had attended public schools they would have the same benefits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^^ Many would much rather have a life full of kindness and decency (regular life) or of inspiration and innovation (TJ) than the elite and out of touch world you describe PP.

Plenty of asshole TJ boosters on this thread, on multiple threads on the VA Public Schools Forum, on the AAP Forum...try looking in the mirror hon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:the kids at the top boarding schools have a lot less pressure because they all have a safety net.
Most if the kids from TJ will have to make it on their own.

+ and family connections.

TJ kids maybe as capable as BS kids but TJ parents cannot provide the same level of support BS parents can.

What does "support" mean? You mean pure cash, right? Because nothing about the BS parents suggests they are full of love and care (their time is spent cheating people to amass that ill-gotten wealth. Did you learn nothing from the banking crisis ?? ) You must be one of those idiots who went to BS

[Anonymous]

I went to one of the BS mentioned here. I loved it, and it continues to feel like home to me when I visit. I was a FA kid, so not by any means the old money 1% club. We're at that level (at least wealth-wise) now, and it's probably not in small part as a result of skills I developed and people I met at that early age. Not really a comparison vis a vis TJ (since I'd never heard of it before moving here), but just my experience. I do think the point a PP raised above is very true and, while subtle, very important. BS kids at Harvard or Yale are on a different footing from public school kids. There were around 25 kids from my senior class that were also in my class at Yale, and I had a natural fluency them and with other kids from similar environs that ends up being important in all sorts of ways that you can't really appreciate from the outside (though I was probably more sensitive to them being an "outsider" on the inside).

Anyway, this thread is unfortunate. Class differences are (understandably) very frustrating to those on the outside looking in. But it sounds like we are talking about a very small, elite universe of highly capable kids (whether BS or TJ) who are all going to do just fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:the kids at the top boarding schools have a lot less pressure because they all have a safety net.
Most if the kids from TJ will have to make it on their own.

+ and family connections.

TJ kids maybe as capable as BS kids but TJ parents cannot provide the same level of support BS parents can.

What does "support" mean? You mean pure cash, right? Because nothing about the BS parents suggests they are full of love and care (their time is spent cheating people to amass that ill-gotten wealth. Did you learn nothing from the banking crisis ?? ) You must be one of those idiots who went to BS

If you have to ask, you will never get it. Where you are in the food chain is where you are meant to be. Bottom feeders will always be on the bottom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I went to one of the BS mentioned here. I loved it, and it continues to feel like home to me when I visit. I was a FA kid, so not by any means the old money 1% club. We're at that level (at least wealth-wise) now, and it's probably not in small part as a result of skills I developed and people I met at that early age. Not really a comparison vis a vis TJ (since I'd never heard of it before moving here), but just my experience. I do think the point a PP raised above is very true and, while subtle, very important. BS kids at Harvard or Yale are on a different footing from public school kids. There were around 25 kids from my senior class that were also in my class at Yale, and I had a natural fluency them and with other kids from similar environs that ends up being important in all sorts of ways that you can't really appreciate from the outside (though I was probably more sensitive to them being an "outsider" on the inside).

Anyway, this thread is unfortunate. Class differences are (understandably) very frustrating to those on the outside looking in. But it sounds like we are talking about a very small, elite universe of highly capable kids (whether BS or TJ) who are all going to do just fine.

Sockpuppet much?