How do I deal with social situations before I tell my friends I'm pregnant?
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Anonymous
| A good friends is having a wine and fondue birthday party when I'll be 10 weeks pregnant. DH and I decided not to tell anyone we're expecting until I'm 12 weeks. The party is at a sit down restaurant, so I can't simply not eat or drink. Should I just make an excuse as to why I can't go? Everyone will know something is up if I turn down both the wine AND the fondue (yes, the fondue will also have alcohol in it)...any other ideas? |
Anonymous
| Say you are dd or are on antibiotics. |
Anonymous
| Order wine and don't drink it. (Although a good friend busted me with this ploy, so it doesn't always work.) |
Anonymous
| Wouldn't the alcohol have cooked out of the fondue? |
Anonymous
| I turned down invites to parties that were basically just about drinking. |
Anonymous
|
You can eat the fondue. Just skip the wine and say you don't feel like drinking. That wouldn't be a big deal among my friends.
If you're uncomfortable with that, just don't go. |
Anonymous
| OP. Even if the alcohol burns out of the fondue, I'm still worried about eating unpasteurized cheese. |
Anonymous
| Where are you going? What kind of fondue will it be? I don't think I've ever had fondue made with unpasteurized cheese. Isn't it usually just cheddar or swiss fondue? |
Anonymous
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Pretty sure you can eat the fondue! The alcohol will have mostly burned off, and even if there's a tiny bit, it will be negligible.
mmm ... fondue ... |
Anonymous
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Fondue is typically emmenthaler and gruyere. There is no reason why an unpasturized cheese would be used at a fondue restaurant.
Enjoy the fondue (yum!), have a sip of wine or a glass of perrier. You and baby will be OK. |
Anonymous
Holy crap is this going to be one long ass pregnancy for you and your friends and your DH and anyone who has to listen to you. |
Anonymous
|
Are you going to the Melting Pot? that's a chain restaurant. pretty sure they are not going to be using expensive, unpasteurized cheese for their fondue (which is mixed with so much stuff that unpasteurized cheese would be lost on it anyway.)
At any rate, it's *soft* unpasteurized cheese you need to avoid. I believe that fondue is only made from hard cheeses. |
Anonymous
| Yeah, you will be fine eating the fondue. If you're reaaallly worried you could call the restaurant ahead of time and make sure the cheese is all pasteurized. But the PPs are right -- any cheese served in a big chain restaurant is 99.9 percent certain to be pasteurized and it's soft cheeses you have to worry about anyway. |
Anonymous
This was a helpful comment, PP. Anyway, OP, I basically became a hermit until we started telling people. I was a big drinker and so are my friends... no way anyone would've fallen for any excuse other than pregnancy. It will be a lot easier once you start telling people. Good luck! |
Anonymous
|
If you really want to go, go and eat the fondue, and tell people you're taking antibiotics (if you're friends are as nosy as mine, they may not fall for it though, or you may need to tell them what imaginary disease you are taking the antibiotics for).
If you're ambivalent about going to the event or REALLY don't want people to accidentally find out, then don't go. I'd go -- and if someone does say something despite your efforts I'd pull her aside and ask her to please help you keep your secret. |