Should I have a second kid at 38 (DH 52), or are we just too old?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. You DH would be ,72 when kid was 30. Of course this presumes that your DH would still be alive and I. Good health.

Her DH is 52 so he would be 82

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just wanna know if the OP had an other kid or not.

yes, but she only posts in the special needs and eldercare forums now.

I spit out my coffee. One of the best played comments on DCUM.

[Anonymous]

As you can afford all the support you need while raising two kids, I think it’s a good decision to have another one. It’s like giving your child a built-in friend and companion. They will enjoy growing up together and support each other throughout their lives. It also feels unfair to leave a child alone, since we can’t stay with them forever.
If I were you, I would definitely have another kid.

[Anonymous]

Donald trump had a kid at 60 and lots of adult children, plus his job! Lol. Just do what you want to do. Don't think too much about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Having another child just to give your existing child a sibling is not a good reason. Lots of siblings can't stand each other and their parents did them no favors. Skip it.

This. Also the risk of special needs may be high due to DH’s age. I wouldn’t risk it.

[Anonymous]

Your husband is too old. You are not. His age prevails since that’s who you chose as a partner.

[Anonymous]

You are not too old - had my first at 38 and the third was a surprise!
I don’t even think your husbands age is a big factor, sounds like he’s a good dad.

But…two kids does make you even lonelier (motherhood in America is very lonely) because you will have even less time to cultivate adult relationships

And…don’t have a kid just to give your only a sibling. The first kid just loses quality time with parents (esp a traveling dad who is stretched thin already) and the second kid picks up that they were conceived to be a play date.

[Anonymous]

Did you have the second kid OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As you can afford all the support you need while raising two kids, I think it’s a good decision to have another one. It’s like giving your child a built-in friend and companion. They will enjoy growing up together and support each other throughout their lives. It also feels unfair to leave a child alone, since we can’t stay with them forever.
If I were you, I would definitely have another kid.

I would definitely go for it. Incredible gift to have a sibling

[Anonymous]

You and your husband are both too old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know a colleague, 54, who has two tween kids. He left his 10-years younger wife for a girl a year out of college who started working with us after graduation. She was a rock star employee, and they just bonded and are blissfully happy together. It happens, especially if the wife gets complacent. He says the GF makes him feel alive again after his wife had just been such a downer.

My colleague doesn’t take c**p from the ex. When she tried to set conditions for the kids meeting potential stepparents, he went ahead and introduced them to his girlfriend.

OP, that’s how your husband needs to be. You’re his priority now, you and your own kids. His first family had their chance already, and none of them stepped up to the plate. They took him for granted.

You do that with a wealthy, successful professional, and an attractive talented and captivating woman will come along and do things right with him.

Don’t let your husband go on the market for #3. You’re giving him a hard time, and now he’s meeting a slew of flight attendants. One of them would make an excellent third wife.

Why are you giving advice to a 4 year old thread?? Sound like a Dear Abby/ Cosmopolitan mag! Too late and too old!

[Anonymous]

Don't do it. Bringing 1 person into this situation never should have happened. Neither one of you aren't interactive much with the first one. Full time nanny? So neither one of you do much parenting. Poor kid.

Not every person wants a sibling. Not every person gets along and has a relationship with their sibling(s)

You are making the situation even more chaotic and dysfunctional.

You already live and exist in dysfunction. You never should have been with this man in the first place.
There shouldn't have been a first.



Also, 38+ people shouldn't become first time parents. They should except the ship has sailed and they weren't on the boat. Having children at your age and older is a form of arrested development.