Wife nearly died. Angry with underwhelming response from her family

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This sounds like my MIL who still hasn't acknowledged that my wife has MS. My MIL is the most self involved person I have ever known. She ignored her grandchildren for 12, 13 years until most recently as she feels her mortality. Big hugs to you for being a loving husband.

My uncle died in 2014 (was diagnosed with MS in the mid 90s). He died at home, which in the end took him about half a year. My aunt asked his parents (who live down the street!!!!) to come over multiple times, if they (his mother, his father never came) came over, they never even entered his bedroom but only chatted to my aunt and cousins. My aunt asked his siblings (who live 10 and 15 minutes away respectively) to please visit and say their farewells multiple times, they never did.

After his death, my aunt called his family to tell them he had passed.
Want to guess what they said?
"What? We weren't aware he was so close to death! Why didn't you call us sooner, we could have come over to say goodbye."

I just... I live 3hrs away. I was aware he was dying. He had not been able to get out of bed for half a year, he wasn't able to talk for the last four or five months, he was barely breathing for the last three or so. Had it not been for a heart beat he could just as well have been dead. His health nothing but declined over the last few years, there were no more ups or stable times, it just went downhill steadily. He wasn't even able to attend his own birthday "party" because he wasn't able to sit in a chair any more in the end and was basically just vegetating. It was a relief for everybody, including him, when his time came in the end.

But hey. His dad also didn't go to the funeral because he "doesn't do" funerals.
After my uncle's death my aunt and her children have pretty much been disowned by his family. I guess 30 years of marriage, 15 of which he was home bound and she was his full-time carer while herself being ill (Chrohn's) and caring for a daughter who was diagnosed with cancer at 17 and working to put food on the table didn't count for much.