Dolling yourself up for husband

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the definition of dolling up? My mother has always been a SAHM. I remember her always starting to get herself ready around 5 pm everyday. She’d shower again, put on something pretty and some light makeup. My dad always came home at 6, and then they’d giggle like kids in the kitchen while she put the final touches on dinner. We knew to wait elsewhere until we were called to eat. I try to always look presentable.

Being a SAHM used to be so different. 4-7pm is just about my busiest time of day with homework, getting dinner at the exact right time everyone can eat together, and driving kids around to various activities. I can’t imagine taking that time to shower and hang out with my husband.

We didn't chronically overschedule our kids back then. They didn't have "extracurriculars" every night of the week. They'd be out, running around the neighborhood or riding their bikes in packs, and parents were home, cooking, cleaning, and preparing for the evening.

We messed it up, honestly. Not a tradwife, but there are some things about "the way it was" that were better for adults and kids, IMO.

Was there travel soccer or hockey back in the 80s or 90s?
When I was a kid, I didn't rely on parents to chauffeur me around. I did sports afterschool and rode the afterschool bus home. I walked to ballet class. That said, like most suburban kids, I got my driver's license ASAP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think I'm quite beautiful naturally. I have great skin, beautiful eyes and nice lips. My husband never expects me to "doll" up and always tells me how beautiful I am as is.

LOL. I don’t know if you are naturally beautiful but you definitely don’t lack self-confidence.

Shouldn't all women feel beautiful? Why is that a bad thing?

the beauty industry is built on women believing they are not beautiful and enough naturally that they just need this or that.

The increase in attractiveness between “natural” and “made up” is abundantly obvious to both men and women. It’s pointless to pretend the two conditions are equally beautiful.

So a woman has to be full of fake sh*t before you find her beautiful? That's sad for you (or your partner).

Taking care of your appearance isn’t fake. It reflects very real and important qualities, including respect for yourself and for others. If your partner (male or female) stops taking care of their appearance, that’s a real and unmistakable signal of how they regard themselves and you. In its extreme form, not attending to dress and hygiene is a symptom of mental illness, which is a real thing, not just them casting aside “fake” stuff.

Taking care of your appearance doesn’t need to include changing your face or lip color. Basic hygiene is not makeup. It’s really sad you don’t think women can be beautiful naturally bare faced.

It’s really sad you’re too stupid to understand that a woman who looks “beautiful naturally bare faced” will look even more beautiful when she puts on makeup. That’s what makeup does… that’s what it’s for… duh!

Hard disagree. I’ve watched some really beautiful women transform themselves into parodies with contouring and lash extensions.

I shouldn’t have to explain that a woman who looks “beautiful naturally bare faced” will look even more beautiful when she puts on makeup if she does it properly but I forgot to take into account the existence of extremely stupid people like you.

That is your opinion. I don’t find that make-up enhances beauty. It’s just paint and powder on your face. It’s like saying a tattoo makes an arm even more beautiful than a bare skin arm - because it has colour and ink on it. Same with make-up. If to you make up or tattoos or jewelry or hair dye are associated with beauty - then you will think people with those look more beautiful but many of us don’t have that association.

Makup enhances good basic bone structure.
If your face doesn't have that, makeup ends up looking like kabuki theater.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the definition of dolling up? My mother has always been a SAHM. I remember her always starting to get herself ready around 5 pm everyday. She’d shower again, put on something pretty and some light makeup. My dad always came home at 6, and then they’d giggle like kids in the kitchen while she put the final touches on dinner. We knew to wait elsewhere until we were called to eat. I try to always look presentable.

Being a SAHM used to be so different. 4-7pm is just about my busiest time of day with homework, getting dinner at the exact right time everyone can eat together, and driving kids around to various activities. I can’t imagine taking that time to shower and hang out with my husband.

We didn't chronically overschedule our kids back then. They didn't have "extracurriculars" every night of the week. They'd be out, running around the neighborhood or riding their bikes in packs, and parents were home, cooking, cleaning, and preparing for the evening.

We messed it up, honestly. Not a tradwife, but there are some things about "the way it was" that were better for adults and kids, IMO.

Was there travel soccer or hockey back in the 80s or 90s?
When I was a kid, I didn't rely on parents to chauffeur me around. I did sports afterschool and rode the afterschool bus home. I walked to ballet class. That said, like most suburban kids, I got my driver's license ASAP.

There were.
I took ballet classes four days a week with a studio about 30 minutes from my house. My brother played tennis year round and took private lessons.
This was all in Columbus, OH.

I can’t really relate to this “kids are so over scheduled now” line. I actually feel like I’m more focused on making sure we have family time than my parents were.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the definition of dolling up? My mother has always been a SAHM. I remember her always starting to get herself ready around 5 pm everyday. She’d shower again, put on something pretty and some light makeup. My dad always came home at 6, and then they’d giggle like kids in the kitchen while she put the final touches on dinner. We knew to wait elsewhere until we were called to eat. I try to always look presentable.

Being a SAHM used to be so different. 4-7pm is just about my busiest time of day with homework, getting dinner at the exact right time everyone can eat together, and driving kids around to various activities. I can’t imagine taking that time to shower and hang out with my husband.

We didn't chronically overschedule our kids back then. They didn't have "extracurriculars" every night of the week. They'd be out, running around the neighborhood or riding their bikes in packs, and parents were home, cooking, cleaning, and preparing for the evening.

We messed it up, honestly. Not a tradwife, but there are some things about "the way it was" that were better for adults and kids, IMO.

Was there travel soccer or hockey back in the 80s or 90s?
When I was a kid, I didn't rely on parents to chauffeur me around. I did sports afterschool and rode the afterschool bus home. I walked to ballet class. That said, like most suburban kids, I got my driver's license ASAP.

There were.
I took ballet classes four days a week with a studio about 30 minutes from my house. My brother played tennis year round and took private lessons.
This was all in Columbus, OH.

I can’t really relate to this “kids are so over scheduled now” line. I actually feel like I’m more focused on making sure we have family time than my parents were.

I knew kids like this growing up too. But they were the exception, not the rule.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think I'm quite beautiful naturally. I have great skin, beautiful eyes and nice lips. My husband never expects me to "doll" up and always tells me how beautiful I am as is.

LOL. I don’t know if you are naturally beautiful but you definitely don’t lack self-confidence.

Shouldn't all women feel beautiful? Why is that a bad thing?

the beauty industry is built on women believing they are not beautiful and enough naturally that they just need this or that.

The increase in attractiveness between “natural” and “made up” is abundantly obvious to both men and women. It’s pointless to pretend the two conditions are equally beautiful.

So a woman has to be full of fake sh*t before you find her beautiful? That's sad for you (or your partner).

Taking care of your appearance isn’t fake. It reflects very real and important qualities, including respect for yourself and for others. If your partner (male or female) stops taking care of their appearance, that’s a real and unmistakable signal of how they regard themselves and you. In its extreme form, not attending to dress and hygiene is a symptom of mental illness, which is a real thing, not just them casting aside “fake” stuff.

Taking care of your appearance doesn’t need to include changing your face or lip color. Basic hygiene is not makeup. It’s really sad you don’t think women can be beautiful naturally bare faced.

It’s really sad you’re too stupid to understand that a woman who looks “beautiful naturally bare faced” will look even more beautiful when she puts on makeup. That’s what makeup does… that’s what it’s for… duh!

Hard disagree. I’ve watched some really beautiful women transform themselves into parodies with contouring and lash extensions.

I shouldn’t have to explain that a woman who looks “beautiful naturally bare faced” will look even more beautiful when she puts on makeup if she does it properly but I forgot to take into account the existence of extremely stupid people like you.

That is your opinion. I don’t find that make-up enhances beauty. It’s just paint and powder on your face. It’s like saying a tattoo makes an arm even more beautiful than a bare skin arm - because it has colour and ink on it. Same with make-up. If to you make up or tattoos or jewelry or hair dye are associated with beauty - then you will think people with those look more beautiful but many of us don’t have that association.

"It’s just paint and powder on your face." And clothing is just woven fabrics on your body. Are you really this stupid? It's fascinating.

"It’s like saying a tattoo makes an arm even more beautiful than a bare skin arm" - it's not like saying that because tats make you uglier not more beautiful.

"That is your opinion." - It's the opinion of the millions of women who support the $650bn/year beauty industry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do this every day. I simply expect it of myself; it's how I was raised. Happily married over 20 years.

OMG, I hope you don't have kids. That's not the life lesson I want to pass on to my kids. Women's accomplishment should be more than sex.

Weird take. My mom was like this and yet I ended up with an advanced degree and a fancy job. You can look nice for your spouse and still have a brain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I always am presentable and dress well whether I am at home or out and about. I'm French so I guess it is cultural. I was not raised to be a slob, and I married my DH because he also has these same values. And naturally, we teach our children likewise. It's about having respect for yourself, your family, and your community. When I see Americans dressed as slobs...well there is a saying we have in France about them.

I saw the most beautiful, well-dressed extended family over by the Mall and I just knew they were not Americans. Nope, Italian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I always am presentable and dress well whether I am at home or out and about. I'm French so I guess it is cultural. I was not raised to be a slob, and I married my DH because he also has these same values. And naturally, we teach our children likewise. It's about having respect for yourself, your family, and your community. When I see Americans dressed as slobs...well there is a saying we have in France about them.

I saw the most beautiful, well-dressed extended family over by the Mall and I just knew they were not Americans. Nope, Italian.

HH

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the definition of dolling up? My mother has always been a SAHM. I remember her always starting to get herself ready around 5 pm everyday. She’d shower again, put on something pretty and some light makeup. My dad always came home at 6, and then they’d giggle like kids in the kitchen while she put the final touches on dinner. We knew to wait elsewhere until we were called to eat. I try to always look presentable.

Being a SAHM used to be so different. 4-7pm is just about my busiest time of day with homework, getting dinner at the exact right time everyone can eat together, and driving kids around to various activities. I can’t imagine taking that time to shower and hang out with my husband.

We didn't chronically overschedule our kids back then. They didn't have "extracurriculars" every night of the week. They'd be out, running around the neighborhood or riding their bikes in packs, and parents were home, cooking, cleaning, and preparing for the evening.

We messed it up, honestly. Not a tradwife, but there are some things about "the way it was" that were better for adults and kids, IMO.

Was there travel soccer or hockey back in the 80s or 90s?
When I was a kid, I didn't rely on parents to chauffeur me around. I did sports afterschool and rode the afterschool bus home. I walked to ballet class. That said, like most suburban kids, I got my driver's license ASAP.

Different poster, but yes there was travel sports then.

Travel sports now are more for the parents than the kids. The whole excuse that it helps kids get college scholarships is laoughable. Invest that same amount of money and you could easily pay for college. Your kid isn't going pro.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Over time I’ve taken note of what DH likes and yes have done things for his benefit. Wearing more thongs. Short skirts and sundresses. Brazilians. Hair certain ways. Subtle makeup. Occasional “porn star” nights. Why wouldn’t we do things to make our partners happy?

What has he done for you?

Makes good money. Is a great dad. Keeps in shape and healthy. Goes down on me regularly. Prioritizes my O. Marriage is a mutual thing - we each do things for the other.

+1

I like to like nice regardless of the situation. If making my husband happy means an extra couple minutes of effort a day, why not. He definitely puts in more than a few extra minutes a day to make sure my needs are met and I am happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the definition of dolling up? My mother has always been a SAHM. I remember her always starting to get herself ready around 5 pm everyday. She’d shower again, put on something pretty and some light makeup. My dad always came home at 6, and then they’d giggle like kids in the kitchen while she put the final touches on dinner. We knew to wait elsewhere until we were called to eat. I try to always look presentable.

Being a SAHM used to be so different. 4-7pm is just about my busiest time of day with homework, getting dinner at the exact right time everyone can eat together, and driving kids around to various activities. I can’t imagine taking that time to shower and hang out with my husband.

We didn't chronically overschedule our kids back then. They didn't have "extracurriculars" every night of the week. They'd be out, running around the neighborhood or riding their bikes in packs, and parents were home, cooking, cleaning, and preparing for the evening.

We messed it up, honestly. Not a tradwife, but there are some things about "the way it was" that were better for adults and kids, IMO.

Was there travel soccer or hockey back in the 80s or 90s?
When I was a kid, I didn't rely on parents to chauffeur me around. I did sports afterschool and rode the afterschool bus home. I walked to ballet class. That said, like most suburban kids, I got my driver's license ASAP.

Different poster, but yes there was travel sports then.

Maybe it existed, but I never heard of anyone who did it, and I went to a private school (full of the kinds of kids you would expect to do it).