How do deal with 17YO DD having sex

[Anonymous]

You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

[Anonymous]

After the couch guy tik tok, most girls don’t want relationships because 9/10 they are the ones to get hurt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

People cheat in committed relationships AND marriages. Do you all get tested for STD’s weekly?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

People cheat in committed relationships AND marriages. Do you all get tested for STD’s weekly?

You really do not sound like a parent of a teen.

Not sure why you are advocating for careless behavior that could have extremely negative impacts on a young persons life.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand people who say that something is healthy because it's "normal." It's normal in the US to have less than $1,000 in savings. Is that healthy? It's so normal in W. Virginia to use opiates that o.d. deaths are not even measured in deaths per 100,000 people anymore, they are measured in deaths per 1,000. Would you tell your child that having less than $1000 and using opiates is totally normal AND HEALTHY?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

People cheat in committed relationships AND marriages. Do you all get tested for STD’s weekly?

You really do not sound like a parent of a teen.

Not sure why you are advocating for careless behavior that could have extremely negative impacts on a young persons life.

No one is advocating. Her daughter came to her and the deal is done. At least she knows and can help and support her. Do you know how many teens never ever tell their parents anything they do?

When you have uptight holier than thou parents, teens are tight lipped on what they are really doing anyway.

And you know what else is even sadder? As a SANE nurse for 8 years, those type of teens will never allow us to notify their parents. It’s so so heart breaking. Because they don’t want to disappoint their parents like you are all doing here. Judging a situation. I did rape kits on girls as you as 11. Imagine thinking my mom will be mad at me. Makes me sick. It was such a surreal experience. But it 100% made me prepared to be a better mom to my teens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

People cheat in committed relationships AND marriages. Do you all get tested for STD’s weekly?

You really do not sound like a parent of a teen.

Not sure why you are advocating for careless behavior that could have extremely negative impacts on a young persons life.

No one is advocating. Her daughter came to her and the deal is done. At least she knows and can help and support her. Do you know how many teens never ever tell their parents anything they do?

When you have uptight holier than thou parents, teens are tight lipped on what they are really doing anyway.

And you know what else is even sadder? As a SANE nurse for 8 years, those type of teens will never allow us to notify their parents. It’s so so heart breaking. Because they don’t want to disappoint their parents like you are all doing here. Judging a situation. I did rape kits on girls as you as 11. Imagine thinking my mom will be mad at me. Makes me sick. It was such a surreal experience. But it 100% made me prepared to be a better mom to my teens.

Oh please - I like many others, advocated for open discussion of safe and responsible.methods for contraception and protection from STDs. This is hardly acting holier than thou.

I also advocate for teens being made aware of the emotional side of intimacy. My teen DD of same age does talk to me about all of this stuff but says many teens don’t. Her pediatrician and gynecologist are also safe places for her to talk about these matters.

Not sure why you dismiss parents who advise to talk about emotional side of intimacy. Many teens themselves say there is enormous pressure to be sexual before they themselves are ready.

I want our DD to respect herself and others in different ways, and this is just one way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

It’s funny that you think this, unless you’re a teenager masquerading as a parent in order to influence your mother into thinking hookups are normal amongst minors—I guarantee you I’m closer to Gen Z than you are and this is 100% not “how teens are dating”.

Like at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

People cheat in committed relationships AND marriages. Do you all get tested for STD’s weekly?

You really do not sound like a parent of a teen.

Not sure why you are advocating for careless behavior that could have extremely negative impacts on a young persons life.

No one is advocating. Her daughter came to her and the deal is done. At least she knows and can help and support her. Do you know how many teens never ever tell their parents anything they do?

When you have uptight holier than thou parents, teens are tight lipped on what they are really doing anyway.

And you know what else is even sadder? As a SANE nurse for 8 years, those type of teens will never allow us to notify their parents. It’s so so heart breaking. Because they don’t want to disappoint their parents like you are all doing here. Judging a situation. I did rape kits on girls as you as 11. Imagine thinking my mom will be mad at me. Makes me sick. It was such a surreal experience. But it 100% made me prepared to be a better mom to my teens.

Oh w.e.i.r.d. Using the R word to try and guilt/emotionally manipulate people who disagree with you.

Regretting having sex and being afraid to tell Mom is not rape, and unless you’re a nurse in freaking Saudi Arabia I can’t imagine any parent in America, in the last decade, actually being mad at an 11 year old for being an actual rape victim.

Regretting the next day and getting a rape kit done JUST IN CASE Mom finds out and/or in order to get sympathy and a free (not billed to insurance) STD test? Sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

People cheat in committed relationships AND marriages. Do you all get tested for STD’s weekly?

You really do not sound like a parent of a teen.

Not sure why you are advocating for careless behavior that could have extremely negative impacts on a young persons life.

No one is advocating. Her daughter came to her and the deal is done. At least she knows and can help and support her. Do you know how many teens never ever tell their parents anything they do?

When you have uptight holier than thou parents, teens are tight lipped on what they are really doing anyway.

And you know what else is even sadder? As a SANE nurse for 8 years, those type of teens will never allow us to notify their parents. It’s so so heart breaking. Because they don’t want to disappoint their parents like you are all doing here. Judging a situation. I did rape kits on girls as you as 11. Imagine thinking my mom will be mad at me. Makes me sick. It was such a surreal experience. But it 100% made me prepared to be a better mom to my teens.

Oh w.e.i.r.d. Using the R word to try and guilt/emotionally manipulate people who disagree with you.

Regretting having sex and being afraid to tell Mom is not rape, and unless you’re a nurse in freaking Saudi Arabia I can’t imagine any parent in America, in the last decade, actually being mad at an 11 year old for being an actual rape victim.

Regretting the next day and getting a rape kit done JUST IN CASE Mom finds out and/or in order to get sympathy and a free (not billed to insurance) STD test? Sure.

I really appreciate that the 11yo has so much forethought into medical insurance procedure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

People cheat in committed relationships AND marriages. Do you all get tested for STD’s weekly?

You really do not sound like a parent of a teen.

Not sure why you are advocating for careless behavior that could have extremely negative impacts on a young persons life.

No one is advocating. Her daughter came to her and the deal is done. At least she knows and can help and support her. Do you know how many teens never ever tell their parents anything they do?

When you have uptight holier than thou parents, teens are tight lipped on what they are really doing anyway.

And you know what else is even sadder? As a SANE nurse for 8 years, those type of teens will never allow us to notify their parents. It’s so so heart breaking. Because they don’t want to disappoint their parents like you are all doing here. Judging a situation. I did rape kits on girls as you as 11. Imagine thinking my mom will be mad at me. Makes me sick. It was such a surreal experience. But it 100% made me prepared to be a better mom to my teens.

wow you are such a perfect mom. it's sad one must be a nurse to be so

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

People cheat in committed relationships AND marriages. Do you all get tested for STD’s weekly?

You really do not sound like a parent of a teen.

Not sure why you are advocating for careless behavior that could have extremely negative impacts on a young persons life.

No one is advocating. Her daughter came to her and the deal is done. At least she knows and can help and support her. Do you know how many teens never ever tell their parents anything they do?

When you have uptight holier than thou parents, teens are tight lipped on what they are really doing anyway.

And you know what else is even sadder? As a SANE nurse for 8 years, those type of teens will never allow us to notify their parents. It’s so so heart breaking. Because they don’t want to disappoint their parents like you are all doing here. Judging a situation. I did rape kits on girls as you as 11. Imagine thinking my mom will be mad at me. Makes me sick. It was such a surreal experience. But it 100% made me prepared to be a better mom to my teens.

need more tips from this perfect nurse parent, like, just give up, "the deal is done".

but the deal is not done - not forever. people date someone and then they stop. they agree to sex, then they change their minds, within an hour. even adults, much less teens change their minds all the time. the parent is there to provide a perspective that the teen does not have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

People cheat in committed relationships AND marriages. Do you all get tested for STD’s weekly?

You really do not sound like a parent of a teen.

Not sure why you are advocating for careless behavior that could have extremely negative impacts on a young persons life.

No one is advocating. Her daughter came to her and the deal is done. At least she knows and can help and support her. Do you know how many teens never ever tell their parents anything they do?

When you have uptight holier than thou parents, teens are tight lipped on what they are really doing anyway.

And you know what else is even sadder? As a SANE nurse for 8 years, those type of teens will never allow us to notify their parents. It’s so so heart breaking. Because they don’t want to disappoint their parents like you are all doing here. Judging a situation. I did rape kits on girls as you as 11. Imagine thinking my mom will be mad at me. Makes me sick. It was such a surreal experience. But it 100% made me prepared to be a better mom to my teens.

Oh w.e.i.r.d. Using the R word to try and guilt/emotionally manipulate people who disagree with you.

Regretting having sex and being afraid to tell Mom is not rape, and unless you’re a nurse in freaking Saudi Arabia I can’t imagine any parent in America, in the last decade, actually being mad at an 11 year old for being an actual rape victim.

Regretting the next day and getting a rape kit done JUST IN CASE Mom finds out and/or in order to get sympathy and a free (not billed to insurance) STD test? Sure.

You are clueless and disgusting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are thinking this girl is having casual sex but it just shows you how have no idea how the current teens are dating. This is basically a “you want to go out with me” type of relationship we all had, but realizing they aren’t committing past graduation. It’s smart.

Like partners who don’t want to marry. Cleaner to get out when needed. Very very common for teens in high school and college.

At least they aren’t naive to think they will be “always and forever” through college and their 20’s.

Either way, the teen needs to be informed about optimal birth control methods and STD prevention, which are not the same methods.

Also teen should be made aware of risks of having sex with no strings attached as there is ample evidence that many more teen girls rather than teen boys, come to regret it. If it is an informed decision that the teen feels ready for, great. If not, it is good to be aware that she should not feel pressured for sexual activity that she is not ready for. An overwhelming majority of teens report that most teens start sexual activity before they are ready for it.

People cheat in committed relationships AND marriages. Do you all get tested for STD’s weekly?

You really do not sound like a parent of a teen.

Not sure why you are advocating for careless behavior that could have extremely negative impacts on a young persons life.

No one is advocating. Her daughter came to her and the deal is done. At least she knows and can help and support her. Do you know how many teens never ever tell their parents anything they do?

When you have uptight holier than thou parents, teens are tight lipped on what they are really doing anyway.

And you know what else is even sadder? As a SANE nurse for 8 years, those type of teens will never allow us to notify their parents. It’s so so heart breaking. Because they don’t want to disappoint their parents like you are all doing here. Judging a situation. I did rape kits on girls as you as 11. Imagine thinking my mom will be mad at me. Makes me sick. It was such a surreal experience. But it 100% made me prepared to be a better mom to my teens.

wow you are such a perfect mom. it's sad one must be a nurse to be so

Did she say she was a perfect mom? I am a high school teacher and it has definitely opened my eyes to what really goes on and that helps me be a better parent and be more in the know and what questions to ask etc.... I am sure a nurse who has seen a lot of scared pre-teens and teens come in and refuse to contact a parent changes the way you parent.