When you're at a dinner party and there's only wine, no other drinks

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That is a shame, OP.

I have had a similar problem a few times. I don't drink liquor (I do drink wine and beer, but I have little tolerance for liquor) and occasionally I find myself in a "bottle service" or "liquor bar + mixers only" situation where I have nothing to drink. It kind of sucks - everyone else is getting sloshed and I'm making myself a drink with 95% cranberry or orange juice and a splash of vodka so I won't look lame.

So you won't look lame? Who gives a sh*t?!

No "bottle service" or "liquor bar + mixers only" situation would not include soda water and lime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That is a shame, OP.

I have had a similar problem a few times. I don't drink liquor (I do drink wine and beer, but I have little tolerance for liquor) and occasionally I find myself in a "bottle service" or "liquor bar + mixers only" situation where I have nothing to drink. It kind of sucks - everyone else is getting sloshed and I'm making myself a drink with 95% cranberry or orange juice and a splash of vodka so I won't look lame.

First of all, you do drink liquor if you are having a splash of vodka.

Second, you are one of those annoying people who thinks everyone is observing them/caring about what they do, always. NO ONE GIVES A SHIT. I socialize often, and have no idea whether Jane is drinking a vodka soda or just soda with lime; I have no idea if Tim is having a Stella or an O'Douls; I have no idea if Susie is having plain craberry juice or cranberry with vodka. Don't know, don't CARE. What, do you go around smelling and tasting your friend's drinks? If I'm talking with someone, and they are fun and interesting, I don't notice or care if they are drinking water, wine, Diet Coke or Perrier. What's wrong with you that you feel "lame" for not drinking hard liquor? Are you 12?

LOL. This is like those pregnant women..."I'm only 10 weeks, but at Thanksgiving EVERYONE will notice if I don't drink!" As if people are sniffing and tasting what's in your glass, just as pointed out above. Cranberry, splash of soda, lime and you are having a mixed drink--no alcohol required.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That is a shame, OP.

I have had a similar problem a few times. I don't drink liquor (I do drink wine and beer, but I have little tolerance for liquor) and occasionally I find myself in a "bottle service" or "liquor bar + mixers only" situation where I have nothing to drink. It kind of sucks - everyone else is getting sloshed and I'm making myself a drink with 95% cranberry or orange juice and a splash of vodka so I won't look lame.

What is a bottle service or liquor bar plus mixers situation? I have never been in either

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's fine to have just water, but I do think your host should have offered it. But maybe they really just forgot.

I agree, especially since there were water glasses on the table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That is a shame, OP.

I have had a similar problem a few times. I don't drink liquor (I do drink wine and beer, but I have little tolerance for liquor) and occasionally I find myself in a "bottle service" or "liquor bar + mixers only" situation where I have nothing to drink. It kind of sucks - everyone else is getting sloshed and I'm making myself a drink with 95% cranberry or orange juice and a splash of vodka so I won't look lame.

What is a bottle service or liquor bar plus mixers situation? I have never been in either

Lol me neither, guess we don’t get invited to the fancy parties.

[Anonymous]

I agree with OP.

And this situation happens to me quite often.

I do not drink alcohol and I find myself at a dinner (family or friends) and there's only water or wine to drink.
I wish I could drink coke or something just more fancy than water.

I am a good hostess and offer a wide range of drinks during a meal at my place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with OP.

And this situation happens to me quite often.

I do not drink alcohol and I find myself at a dinner (family or friends) and there's only water or wine to drink.
I wish I could drink coke or something just more fancy than water.

I am a good hostess and offer a wide range of drinks during a meal at my place.

Why don't you pack your own coke or mountain dew or whatever? Sodas are for casual BBQs, not nice dinner parties. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with OP.

And this situation happens to me quite often.

I do not drink alcohol and I find myself at a dinner (family or friends) and there's only water or wine to drink.
I wish I could drink coke or something just more fancy than water.

I am a good hostess and offer a wide range of drinks during a meal at my place.

Coke = "fancy"?

LMAO

[Anonymous]

I don't know any adults who drink juice or soda at dinner. It would never occur to me to offer that. I always have water out though. A dinner party is not a restaurant - it is strange to expect a wide variety of beverages that most people don't keep on hand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with OP.

And this situation happens to me quite often.

I do not drink alcohol and I find myself at a dinner (family or friends) and there's only water or wine to drink.
I wish I could drink coke or something just more fancy than water.

I am a good hostess and offer a wide range of drinks during a meal at my place.

Coke = "fancy"?

LMAO

Right? I think there's a subtle class division going on here that I've never noticed before. People who mostly drink water vs people who need soda or sugary drinks with dinner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's fine to have just water, but I do think your host should have offered it. But maybe they really just forgot.

I agree, especially since there were water glasses on the table.

I think your host definitely forgot. I wouldn't dwell on it. And they definitely realized their mistake when they went to clear the table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with OP.

And this situation happens to me quite often.

I do not drink alcohol and I find myself at a dinner (family or friends) and there's only water or wine to drink.
I wish I could drink coke or something just more fancy than water.

I am a good hostess and offer a wide range of drinks during a meal at my place.

Soda is not "more fancy" than water or sparkling water--that's rather the point.

And what are you serving? Because if you're serving pizza or lasagna, fine; Diet Coke makes sense in that context. If you are serving filet mignon or salmon en croute, soda is not what you serve. It's all about the level of formality of the dinner, people!

[Anonymous]

I always have soda in the bar for parties and ginger ale for stomach bug days. I would offer it to guests for a nice dinner b.c it's there already and I have several friends In Recovery who do really need something with flavor. If it's Summer I do a pitcher of Sweet Tea b.c I did grow up in the South. Most people just go with water or La Croix.

But juice?? No way! I don't keep that in the house and I would never expect it. Maybe for a Brunch...you are weird OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I have had the same problem. If I'm offered only alcohol, I ask for water. I just hope that the host notices and feels a little awkward and that the next time they invite people over that they include some iced tea or sodas. But I don't want to make a big deal out of it.

I've been in recovery since 1987, so I'm cool with water. But it's also true that usually if I'm around alcohol, I'd prefer something with flavor like a Coke so the alcohol doesn't distract me. I manage okay without it but I do wonder about people who are recently in recovery. It must be so much harder for them.

Maybe if they cannot handle dinner parties that are not run like full
Service restaurants they should stay hom and get more thearapy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ok, I think it is odd not to have water for everyone, even those drinking wine. But for a dinner, I think it is odd to expect more than water to be offered.

Cocktail hour, happy hour, backyard bbq, sure. I would offer a selection of non-alcoholic drinks. But in general, wine is picked to pair well with the meal and water is to quench your thirst. You can live through a meal without a tasty drink.

Normally I would agree with you but as a recovering alcoholic it helps to have something with flavor in it in order to deal with the smells of alcohol that other people are drinking.

OK, well if you are a recovering alcoholic who truly does "need" a sugary drink to help with your specific problem, you need to bring your own or give your hosts a heads up. Because that is WAY different from an adult like OP who simply "needs" sugary drinks because she's ruined her taste buds by drinking sugary beverages with literally every meal, every single DAY.

Most adults who aren't addicted to soda or recovering from alcohol are just fine with drinking water. Water is what we drink at our dinner tables 95% of the time, and we also enjoy wine on special occasions or when guests are around.

+1

My sister is a recovering alcoholic and she drives around with cans and bottles of sparkling water in her car. If you can't go to dinner parties and such where others are drinking without being tempted, you should probably decline those invitations until you are in a healthier state.

Recovering alcoholic pp here. Actually I've been in recovery for decades. I'm fine drinking water when others are drinking wine. Just that it would be nice to have something with flavor in it for those moments when I can smell the alcohol.

I should be clear about this. It's not a matter of risking my recovery. It's just that if I were a host I would be interested in accommodating my guests' needs, even if it was just a slight annoyance for them. So I would want to know that this can make a difference in someone's comfort level. That's why I'm sharing it with y'all. I just find it weird that there are posters who are acting like this is some awful demand on the host or reflective of a working class background (as if there were something wrong with that). Fate worse than death! Serving ice tea or a mocktail at a formal dinner!