Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents told me I can go to any college I want and money is no object as they are not paying. True to work they not only did not pay they charged me rent and made me pay my share of bills to house once I turned 18.

Today as the parent the world has changed. Perhaps parents should get out of the college application and paying for college business.

That said I paid 100 percent first two kids and about to do it again for kid 3.

You could reorient your worldview. My family has had parent-paid college going back into the 1800s. But the expectation is that you get a job decent enough to pay it forward for your own kids. It's worked so far. And each generation has been reasonable about earning scholarships and attending reasonably-priced schools. We are UMC but not rich rich.

Some of us were the first generation going to college, and without parental help. Not having generational help the way you did greatly impacts everything. We're paying it forward, but in a way not to impact our own finances or have dcs take on loans. It means eliminating the majority of schools and staying in state.

That is a very smart choice!!! Or do private schools, but ones that are a tier or two lower that will give you excellent merit

Graduating college debt free or with less than $25-30K should be every ones goal

100%

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents told me I can go to any college I want and money is no object as they are not paying. True to work they not only did not pay they charged me rent and made me pay my share of bills to house once I turned 18.

Today as the parent the world has changed. Perhaps parents should get out of the college application and paying for college business.

That said I paid 100 percent first two kids and about to do it again for kid 3.

You could reorient your worldview. My family has had parent-paid college going back into the 1800s. But the expectation is that you get a job decent enough to pay it forward for your own kids. It's worked so far. And each generation has been reasonable about earning scholarships and attending reasonably-priced schools. We are UMC but not rich rich.

Some of us were the first generation going to college, and without parental help. Not having generational help the way you did greatly impacts everything. We're paying it forward, but in a way not to impact our own finances or have dcs take on loans. It means eliminating the majority of schools and staying in state.

These statements do not belong together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents told me I can go to any college I want and money is no object as they are not paying. True to work they not only did not pay they charged me rent and made me pay my share of bills to house once I turned 18.

Today as the parent the world has changed. Perhaps parents should get out of the college application and paying for college business.

That said I paid 100 percent first two kids and about to do it again for kid 3.

You could reorient your worldview. My family has had parent-paid college going back into the 1800s. But the expectation is that you get a job decent enough to pay it forward for your own kids. It's worked so far. And each generation has been reasonable about earning scholarships and attending reasonably-priced schools. We are UMC but not rich rich.

Some of us were the first generation going to college, and without parental help. Not having generational help the way you did greatly impacts everything. We're paying it forward, but in a way not to impact our own finances or have dcs take on loans. It means eliminating the majority of schools and staying in state.

That is a very smart choice!!! Or do private schools, but ones that are a tier or two lower that will give you excellent merit

Graduating college debt free or with less than $25-30K should be every ones goal

100%

That’s our goal as well. DS is a NMSF and has several full ride options. Also strong merit at other schools including Purdue and Case Western. So damn proud of him!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents told me I can go to any college I want and money is no object as they are not paying. True to work they not only did not pay they charged me rent and made me pay my share of bills to house once I turned 18.

Today as the parent the world has changed. Perhaps parents should get out of the college application and paying for college business.

That said I paid 100 percent first two kids and about to do it again for kid 3.

You could reorient your worldview. My family has had parent-paid college going back into the 1800s. But the expectation is that you get a job decent enough to pay it forward for your own kids. It's worked so far. And each generation has been reasonable about earning scholarships and attending reasonably-priced schools. We are UMC but not rich rich.

Some of us were the first generation going to college, and without parental help. Not having generational help the way you did greatly impacts everything. We're paying it forward, but in a way not to impact our own finances or have dcs take on loans. It means eliminating the majority of schools and staying in state.

That is a very smart choice!!! Or do private schools, but ones that are a tier or two lower that will give you excellent merit

Graduating college debt free or with less than $25-30K should be every ones goal

100%

That’s our goal as well. DS is a NMSF and has several full ride options. Also strong merit at other schools including Purdue and Case Western. So damn proud of him!

You should be, PP! Congratulations and job well done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For those going through the application process w/DC this school year, what lessons have you learned?
What do you wish you’d done differently? What’s worked out well?

Don't wait until Oct 31st to submit your EA application. Access your individual school portals immediately and daily until everything is completely done - if you don't get the SRAR forms completed and returned to the schools who require them (after you submit the common app) in time, you get bumped to regular decision timeline.

Make your student login to their portals in front of you so you can see for yourself that they are working.

Seriously. I had no idea that UMd takes 97 percent of their class in the EA round. Any applicant that waits until Regular Decision is absolutely doomed. Presumably it's the same at other schools. So, lesson - apply early and often.

[Anonymous]

Submit that U-Mich application by early October - especially if your school sends a lot of applicants.

And tailor those essays - it’s not just why U-Michigan…it’s also why Michigan (the state; being a Michigander even if OOS)….the ethos of “Michigan”.

DD had a different Personal statement for that school compared to all other reaches….specifically referencing personal connection to Michigan - in a natural narrative way.

And it worked!

[Anonymous]

Lesson learned: the UMD App has as many essay questions as an Ivy League institution.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lesson learned: the UMD App has as many essay questions as an Ivy League institution.

Seriously, good to know this, but not happy it’s true!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lesson learned: the UMD App has as many essay questions as an Ivy League institution.

Seriously, good to know this, but not happy it’s true!

DP. PP was exaggerating a bit. To clarify, there are a bunch of short-answer (650 character) prompts. The questions are kind of irritating though. "Where would you like to travel to," fine, but "The most interesting fact I ever learned from research was..." is a bit odd, because "research" is quite vague here. They are all get-to-know-you short answer questions, plus a diversity prompt.

This is nothing like, say, Brown or HYPS essays.

[Anonymous]

I’m going to cheat and share something learned in a prior. cycle because some will end up in the same position.

My DC was waitlisted at top choice, mentally moved on as you’re supposed to do after disappointment, and then did end up getting off. You hear love the school that loves you back, but I don’t quite believe in that sentiment. Our college counselor said it better than I could…

The decision you receive, whether a yes or a no or a not yet, is not a measure of your worth or your value. It's a decision made through a complicated matrix of data, subjectivity, and happenstance, by people who don't know you and institutions that have their own, rather than your, best interests at heart.

Point being, it wasn’t personal on their end, so if your kid still loves that school best, it is absolutely okay to choose it without a second thought. It was a weird adjusting their head back to the original school after committing, but they are very glad they did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m going to cheat and share something learned in a prior. cycle because some will end up in the same position.

My DC was waitlisted at top choice, mentally moved on as you’re supposed to do after disappointment, and then did end up getting off. You hear love the school that loves you back, but I don’t quite believe in that sentiment. Our college counselor said it better than I could…

The decision you receive, whether a yes or a no or a not yet, is not a measure of your worth or your value. It's a decision made through a complicated matrix of data, subjectivity, and happenstance, by people who don't know you and institutions that have their own, rather than your, best interests at heart.

Point being, it wasn’t personal on their end, so if your kid still loves that school best, it is absolutely okay to choose it without a second thought. It was a weird adjusting their head back to the original school after committing, but they are very glad they did.

great advice. and one other that our college counselor told us:

In this whole process, its important to remember that colleges want what they DON'T have. While being yourself is important, making yourself distinct and standing out is also vitally important. That will count a lot in WLs too but also early.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lesson learned: the UMD App has as many essay questions as an Ivy League institution.

Seriously, good to know this, but not happy it’s true!

DP. PP was exaggerating a bit. To clarify, there are a bunch of short-answer (650 character) prompts. The questions are kind of irritating though. "Where would you like to travel to," fine, but "The most interesting fact I ever learned from research was..." is a bit odd, because "research" is quite vague here. They are all get-to-know-you short answer questions, plus a diversity prompt.

This is nothing like, say, Brown or HYPS essays.

I have a bit of a contrarian view:

If your kid treats every application - including safeties - as a HYPS application - they will get merit from those schools - or at least be in the running.
My kid has gotten merit from EVERY safety applied to. Shocking. But those essays could have been submitted to any T10. They were thorough and well-researched. Nothing was an afterthought.

So it's been a huge ego boost - after an ED deferral.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lesson learned: the UMD App has as many essay questions as an Ivy League institution.

Seriously, good to know this, but not happy it’s true!

DP. PP was exaggerating a bit. To clarify, there are a bunch of short-answer (650 character) prompts. The questions are kind of irritating though. "Where would you like to travel to," fine, but "The most interesting fact I ever learned from research was..." is a bit odd, because "research" is quite vague here. They are all get-to-know-you short answer questions, plus a diversity prompt.

This is nothing like, say, Brown or HYPS essays.

I have a bit of a contrarian view:

If your kid treats every application - including safeties - as a HYPS application - they will get merit from those schools - or at least be in the running.
My kid has gotten merit from EVERY safety applied to. Shocking. But those essays could have been submitted to any T10. They were thorough and well-researched. Nothing was an afterthought.

So it's been a huge ego boost - after an ED deferral.

I love this attitude. Any chance you’d be comfortable sharing a few of the safeties?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lesson learned: the UMD App has as many essay questions as an Ivy League institution.

Seriously, good to know this, but not happy it’s true!

DP. PP was exaggerating a bit. To clarify, there are a bunch of short-answer (650 character) prompts. The questions are kind of irritating though. "Where would you like to travel to," fine, but "The most interesting fact I ever learned from research was..." is a bit odd, because "research" is quite vague here. They are all get-to-know-you short answer questions, plus a diversity prompt.

This is nothing like, say, Brown or HYPS essays.

I have a bit of a contrarian view:

If your kid treats every application - including safeties - as a HYPS application - they will get merit from those schools - or at least be in the running.
My kid has gotten merit from EVERY safety applied to. Shocking. But those essays could have been submitted to any T10. They were thorough and well-researched. Nothing was an afterthought.

So it's been a huge ego boost - after an ED deferral.

DC did this too and adjusted major as needed with each school, scoured the websites, etc. Spent a ton of time on each file and personalized all the essays. Despite all this and having high stats this didn't work on all safeties or matches and lots of EA deferrals. It's a great idea but not a magic bullet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lesson learned: the UMD App has as many essay questions as an Ivy League institution.

Seriously, good to know this, but not happy it’s true!

DP. PP was exaggerating a bit. To clarify, there are a bunch of short-answer (650 character) prompts. The questions are kind of irritating though. "Where would you like to travel to," fine, but "The most interesting fact I ever learned from research was..." is a bit odd, because "research" is quite vague here. They are all get-to-know-you short answer questions, plus a diversity prompt.

This is nothing like, say, Brown or HYPS essays.

I don't know, bro, Yale, Brown and Princeton had similar short takes. Admission by tweet - fun times!