How the hell is anyone supposed to get into college now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

My daughter's friend who got into Yale was an Asian male with a very high wGPA who won Science Olympiad competitions and is an advanced string player.

Straight A doesn't mean anything, OP, you should know this. There is a world's difference between an A in a regular classs and an A in an AP class. Kids who get into the top colleges have 10+ APs, have a national level EC, etc. Your newpaper editing and team captainship worked a generation ago, but not today.

This is sounds exhausting. Kids have no time to be kids.

They have a ton of time. It's really not that unachievable. We have a ton of college options. If you don't want to be competitive for the top ones, tap out and go to a decent one.

If you go to school all day, play sports after school, eat dinner and have hours of homework, how the hell do you have a ton if time?

The super smart ones only need 2hrs a night for homework when peers need 3-4. Top kids also utilizes weekends to get ahead for the next week. They do it themselves, are highly internally motivated and then if it works out end up at an ivy with a majority of peers the same (the 60% who are unhooked). Most high school students in the top 20% of their HS would not be happy in such an environment. Weird that so many aim for it yet only a few truly thrive in it

This as well as much of the info on this thread is bogus.
-- parent to 2 public school kids in Ivies

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is friendly with a kid who is one of the top 10 chess players in the country for his age. Near perfect GPA, SATs, and a boatload of other fairly impressive ECs. Advanced 3+ years in math, was taking college courses as a sophomore. Got rejected from Harvard. (Did get into Yale, but still - what else was Harvard looking for?)

Math geek/chess player is one of the most generic types of smart boy. Has been true for centuries.

It's unfortunate we don't value this type of student. Those who study, do activities, and positively contribute to their community. Watching the news this spring....take your pick.

I think the point was that this profile is presumably very common in the application pool, making it more difficult to stand out. Not they are not valued. The schools in question likely have many students that are similar to this profile, but they also want musicians, artists, humanities focused, athletes, etc.

We dont know the students intended major or the specifics of EC interests, but in this case Harvard decided they had this profile covered by other candidates they felt were a better fit and/or met the specific institutional priorities that had that year.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

There's a lot to be said for sparing your kid stress and disappointment and looking at decent regional schools with honors programs. Your kid can get an outstanding education without jumping through other people's hoops. Many decent regional schools have excellent academics, dorms, food, sports facilities, and social activities. Kids with the same stats tend to do equally well, whether they attend a top or average school. A bright, hard-working kid who stands out at a regional school will attract the attention of their professors and could get all sorts of opportunities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

My daughter's friend who got into Yale was an Asian male with a very high wGPA who won Science Olympiad competitions and is an advanced string player.

Straight A doesn't mean anything, OP, you should know this. There is a world's difference between an A in a regular classs and an A in an AP class. Kids who get into the top colleges have 10+ APs, have a national level EC, etc. Your newpaper editing and team captainship worked a generation ago, but not today.

This is sounds exhausting. Kids have no time to be kids.

I am 44, and in my European country, high school was a stressful workathon culminating in one heck of a national exam week. I was so stressed out I couldn't eat on the first day of national exams. But that's nowhere near the worst. My cousins come from a country in Asia known for its teen suicide rate due to exam failure. Over there, when school ends for the day, the kids go to afternoon prep schools to cram. I know *elementary school kids* who had tutors to prepare for admission into the most prestigious afternoon prep schools!!! Separate from their regular school! HOW CRAZY IS THAT?!?

All to say: don't ever believe the US has it bad. I promise you, even for the kids who take grades seriously... it's still a layabout's paradise.

Huh? My NYC sibling had a tutor for her 2yo to prep for preschool admissions to get into the right preschool that would line up for the right elementary. That was over 20 years ago. She had two kids - one ended up graduating from Wash U and is unemployed. The other is at an Ivy.

One of my kids had a tutor by elementary. All had tutors in high school and SAT prep. All took multiple APs, as early as 9th grade. The thing about US education isn’t that it’s laid back - it’s that it’s very individual. It’s a huge country and getting into the top 10-15 schools is very hard - but no one will force you to do those things. There are a lot of less competitive options and that’s where most of the laid back kids will end up.

And yet mine and many others are in ivies, unhooked , and got into the "top" preK and elementary, and later magnet high school, based on testing with no tutor and no prep. Rose to the top. There are naturally intelligent , self-disciplined motivated and focused kids out there. The ivies are chock full of them. Why would any parent have their kid in a school they only could survive with tutoring?

+100

My unhooked kid is headed to an Ivy. You could tell from when he was little. We never tutored or test prepped and he was self-motivated—-but frankly never had to study or struggle like other kids.

Next we will be hearing about first chairs at MCYO who never practice. Please. There exist prodigies for sure, and I've met some. Nowhere close to fill top 5, much less top 20 schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is it sad to admit your child needs extra help and get them a good tutor?

Am I missing something?

I am not the PP. Reading the thread and the mentions of "sad" the word seems to relate to parents getting tutors early on just to have their kid barely cling to the top math group, or get into a top magnet high school, all the while pushing and pushing their kid to gun for ivies or even "lower" T20s when these colleges are filled with students who sailed through the hardest high school programs with no tutors. That is how I interpret it, for one: it is indeed sad to tiger-parent your child to try to be something they are not, rather than be in the math level they naturally should be in, even if that is just average in their ridiculous private school, and then trust the process that they will land in a college that suits them, where they have a chance to keep up with the other students or even stand out a little. This race to the top schools that everyone (on DCum) craves yet only a small portion of high school students academically can handle is troubling and wrong. Accept the kid you have at the level they naturally are.

Yeah, I don't see that as sad at all.

Especially if the child graduates on time and gets a decent job. How is that sad?

My parents got me tutors and were very involved in my academic performance. I love them for it. And judging by the fact that I graduated from an Ivy with little difficulty, they did a fantastic job. Some children need an extra push when they are young especially since they are taking on so many different subjects.

Over 80% of the children in my HS had tutors and coaches. And my future children will if they need them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

My daughter's friend who got into Yale was an Asian male with a very high wGPA who won Science Olympiad competitions and is an advanced string player.

Straight A doesn't mean anything, OP, you should know this. There is a world's difference between an A in a regular classs and an A in an AP class. Kids who get into the top colleges have 10+ APs, have a national level EC, etc. Your newpaper editing and team captainship worked a generation ago, but not today.

This is sounds exhausting. Kids have no time to be kids.

They have a ton of time. It's really not that unachievable. We have a ton of college options. If you don't want to be competitive for the top ones, tap out and go to a decent one.

Wrong- kids do not have A TON of time when doing sports and very vigorous classes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

My DC attended top 15 school and the stats:

GPA: U4.0, W4.6, 12 APs or post APs, 1600 SAT, National Merit Scholar, top 1% of class, worked on James Webb telescope at NASA during summer, writing award, President of Volunteer group, Captain of *** (academic) team, member of varsity math team etc.

Superkid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

My daughter's friend who got into Yale was an Asian male with a very high wGPA who won Science Olympiad competitions and is an advanced string player.

Straight A doesn't mean anything, OP, you should know this. There is a world's difference between an A in a regular classs and an A in an AP class. Kids who get into the top colleges have 10+ APs, have a national level EC, etc. Your newpaper editing and team captainship worked a generation ago, but not today.

This is sounds exhausting. Kids have no time to be kids.

I am 44, and in my European country, high school was a stressful workathon culminating in one heck of a national exam week. I was so stressed out I couldn't eat on the first day of national exams. But that's nowhere near the worst. My cousins come from a country in Asia known for its teen suicide rate due to exam failure. Over there, when school ends for the day, the kids go to afternoon prep schools to cram. I know *elementary school kids* who had tutors to prepare for admission into the most prestigious afternoon prep schools!!! Separate from their regular school! HOW CRAZY IS THAT?!?

All to say: don't ever believe the US has it bad. I promise you, even for the kids who take grades seriously... it's still a layabout's paradise.

Huh? My NYC sibling had a tutor for her 2yo to prep for preschool admissions to get into the right preschool that would line up for the right elementary. That was over 20 years ago. She had two kids - one ended up graduating from Wash U and is unemployed. The other is at an Ivy.

One of my kids had a tutor by elementary. All had tutors in high school and SAT prep. All took multiple APs, as early as 9th grade. The thing about US education isn’t that it’s laid back - it’s that it’s very individual. It’s a huge country and getting into the top 10-15 schools is very hard - but no one will force you to do those things. There are a lot of less competitive options and that’s where most of the laid back kids will end up.

And yet mine and many others are in ivies, unhooked , and got into the "top" preK and elementary, and later magnet high school, based on testing with no tutor and no prep. Rose to the top. There are naturally intelligent , self-disciplined motivated and focused kids out there. The ivies are chock full of them. Why would any parent have their kid in a school they only could survive with tutoring?

+100

My unhooked kid is headed to an Ivy. You could tell from when he was little. We never tutored or test prepped and he was self-motivated—-but frankly never had to study or struggle like other kids.

To the pp,
Please share what ec’s did he have, gpa, and SAT score?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

My daughter's friend who got into Yale was an Asian male with a very high wGPA who won Science Olympiad competitions and is an advanced string player.

Straight A doesn't mean anything, OP, you should know this. There is a world's difference between an A in a regular classs and an A in an AP class. Kids who get into the top colleges have 10+ APs, have a national level EC, etc. Your newpaper editing and team captainship worked a generation ago, but not today.

This is sounds exhausting. Kids have no time to be kids.

I am 44, and in my European country, high school was a stressful workathon culminating in one heck of a national exam week. I was so stressed out I couldn't eat on the first day of national exams. But that's nowhere near the worst. My cousins come from a country in Asia known for its teen suicide rate due to exam failure. Over there, when school ends for the day, the kids go to afternoon prep schools to cram. I know *elementary school kids* who had tutors to prepare for admission into the most prestigious afternoon prep schools!!! Separate from their regular school! HOW CRAZY IS THAT?!?

All to say: don't ever believe the US has it bad. I promise you, even for the kids who take grades seriously... it's still a layabout's paradise.

Huh? My NYC sibling had a tutor for her 2yo to prep for preschool admissions to get into the right preschool that would line up for the right elementary. That was over 20 years ago. She had two kids - one ended up graduating from Wash U and is unemployed. The other is at an Ivy.

One of my kids had a tutor by elementary. All had tutors in high school and SAT prep. All took multiple APs, as early as 9th grade. The thing about US education isn’t that it’s laid back - it’s that it’s very individual. It’s a huge country and getting into the top 10-15 schools is very hard - but no one will force you to do those things. There are a lot of less competitive options and that’s where most of the laid back kids will end up.

And yet mine and many others are in ivies, unhooked , and got into the "top" preK and elementary, and later magnet high school, based on testing with no tutor and no prep. Rose to the top. There are naturally intelligent , self-disciplined motivated and focused kids out there. The ivies are chock full of them. Why would any parent have their kid in a school they only could survive with tutoring?

+100

My unhooked kid is headed to an Ivy. You could tell from when he was little. We never tutored or test prepped and he was self-motivated—-but frankly never had to study or struggle like other kids.

Next we will be hearing about first chairs at MCYO who never practice. Please. There exist prodigies for sure, and I've met some. Nowhere close to fill top 5, much less top 20 schools.

The PP is speaking of not needing to study as much as other kids and being highly slef motivated at school not music prodigies. The ivies are filled with naturally bright students who sailed through high school without tutors and aced the SATs and APs in the hardest classes. The vast majority of them were absolutely standout 1-2 kids in their high schools, not counting the mega donors or athletes or other big hooks. Well over half there are unhooked and were superstars in their high school. The adjustment that most will just be around average at the ivy can be hard. It is a significant mental toll on some.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

My daughter's friend who got into Yale was an Asian male with a very high wGPA who won Science Olympiad competitions and is an advanced string player.

Straight A doesn't mean anything, OP, you should know this. There is a world's difference between an A in a regular classs and an A in an AP class. Kids who get into the top colleges have 10+ APs, have a national level EC, etc. Your newpaper editing and team captainship worked a generation ago, but not today.

This is sounds exhausting. Kids have no time to be kids.

I am 44, and in my European country, high school was a stressful workathon culminating in one heck of a national exam week. I was so stressed out I couldn't eat on the first day of national exams. But that's nowhere near the worst. My cousins come from a country in Asia known for its teen suicide rate due to exam failure. Over there, when school ends for the day, the kids go to afternoon prep schools to cram. I know *elementary school kids* who had tutors to prepare for admission into the most prestigious afternoon prep schools!!! Separate from their regular school! HOW CRAZY IS THAT?!?

All to say: don't ever believe the US has it bad. I promise you, even for the kids who take grades seriously... it's still a layabout's paradise.

Huh? My NYC sibling had a tutor for her 2yo to prep for preschool admissions to get into the right preschool that would line up for the right elementary. That was over 20 years ago. She had two kids - one ended up graduating from Wash U and is unemployed. The other is at an Ivy.

One of my kids had a tutor by elementary. All had tutors in high school and SAT prep. All took multiple APs, as early as 9th grade. The thing about US education isn’t that it’s laid back - it’s that it’s very individual. It’s a huge country and getting into the top 10-15 schools is very hard - but no one will force you to do those things. There are a lot of less competitive options and that’s where most of the laid back kids will end up.

And yet mine and many others are in ivies, unhooked , and got into the "top" preK and elementary, and later magnet high school, based on testing with no tutor and no prep. Rose to the top. There are naturally intelligent , self-disciplined motivated and focused kids out there. The ivies are chock full of them. Why would any parent have their kid in a school they only could survive with tutoring?

+100

My unhooked kid is headed to an Ivy. You could tell from when he was little. We never tutored or test prepped and he was self-motivated—-but frankly never had to study or struggle like other kids.

To the pp,
Please share what ec’s did he have, gpa, and SAT score?

Straight As/uw4.0; 35 ACT (once Sophomore year); 5s on all AP exams. Played travel club sport year-round/high level, ran track, had a summer job, community service, involved in 2 clubs, 1 all 4 years. Teachers love him so I know recs were good.

Nothing out of the ordinary. Spent a ton of time on his essays and is a very good, creative writer.

[Anonymous]

^ private Catholic hs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

My daughter's friend who got into Yale was an Asian male with a very high wGPA who won Science Olympiad competitions and is an advanced string player.

Straight A doesn't mean anything, OP, you should know this. There is a world's difference between an A in a regular classs and an A in an AP class. Kids who get into the top colleges have 10+ APs, have a national level EC, etc. Your newpaper editing and team captainship worked a generation ago, but not today.

This is sounds exhausting. Kids have no time to be kids.

I am 44, and in my European country, high school was a stressful workathon culminating in one heck of a national exam week. I was so stressed out I couldn't eat on the first day of national exams. But that's nowhere near the worst. My cousins come from a country in Asia known for its teen suicide rate due to exam failure. Over there, when school ends for the day, the kids go to afternoon prep schools to cram. I know *elementary school kids* who had tutors to prepare for admission into the most prestigious afternoon prep schools!!! Separate from their regular school! HOW CRAZY IS THAT?!?

All to say: don't ever believe the US has it bad. I promise you, even for the kids who take grades seriously... it's still a layabout's paradise.

Huh? My NYC sibling had a tutor for her 2yo to prep for preschool admissions to get into the right preschool that would line up for the right elementary. That was over 20 years ago. She had two kids - one ended up graduating from Wash U and is unemployed. The other is at an Ivy.

One of my kids had a tutor by elementary. All had tutors in high school and SAT prep. All took multiple APs, as early as 9th grade. The thing about US education isn’t that it’s laid back - it’s that it’s very individual. It’s a huge country and getting into the top 10-15 schools is very hard - but no one will force you to do those things. There are a lot of less competitive options and that’s where most of the laid back kids will end up.

And yet mine and many others are in ivies, unhooked , and got into the "top" preK and elementary, and later magnet high school, based on testing with no tutor and no prep. Rose to the top. There are naturally intelligent , self-disciplined motivated and focused kids out there. The ivies are chock full of them. Why would any parent have their kid in a school they only could survive with tutoring?

+100

My unhooked kid is headed to an Ivy. You could tell from when he was little. We never tutored or test prepped and he was self-motivated—-but frankly never had to study or struggle like other kids.

Next we will be hearing about first chairs at MCYO who never practice. Please. There exist prodigies for sure, and I've met some. Nowhere close to fill top 5, much less top 20 schools.

The PP is speaking of not needing to study as much as other kids and being highly slef motivated at school not music prodigies. The ivies are filled with naturally bright students who sailed through high school without tutors and aced the SATs and APs in the hardest classes. The vast majority of them were absolutely standout 1-2 kids in their high schools, not counting the mega donors or athletes or other big hooks. Well over half there are unhooked and were superstars in their high school. The adjustment that most will just be around average at the ivy can be hard. It is a significant mental toll on some.

Maybe. Maybe not. The kids from our HS that have gone onto T10 schools found HS more difficult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

My daughter's friend who got into Yale was an Asian male with a very high wGPA who won Science Olympiad competitions and is an advanced string player.

Straight A doesn't mean anything, OP, you should know this. There is a world's difference between an A in a regular classs and an A in an AP class. Kids who get into the top colleges have 10+ APs, have a national level EC, etc. Your newpaper editing and team captainship worked a generation ago, but not today.

This is sounds exhausting. Kids have no time to be kids.

I am 44, and in my European country, high school was a stressful workathon culminating in one heck of a national exam week. I was so stressed out I couldn't eat on the first day of national exams. But that's nowhere near the worst. My cousins come from a country in Asia known for its teen suicide rate due to exam failure. Over there, when school ends for the day, the kids go to afternoon prep schools to cram. I know *elementary school kids* who had tutors to prepare for admission into the most prestigious afternoon prep schools!!! Separate from their regular school! HOW CRAZY IS THAT?!?

All to say: don't ever believe the US has it bad. I promise you, even for the kids who take grades seriously... it's still a layabout's paradise.

Huh? My NYC sibling had a tutor for her 2yo to prep for preschool admissions to get into the right preschool that would line up for the right elementary. That was over 20 years ago. She had two kids - one ended up graduating from Wash U and is unemployed. The other is at an Ivy.

One of my kids had a tutor by elementary. All had tutors in high school and SAT prep. All took multiple APs, as early as 9th grade. The thing about US education isn’t that it’s laid back - it’s that it’s very individual. It’s a huge country and getting into the top 10-15 schools is very hard - but no one will force you to do those things. There are a lot of less competitive options and that’s where most of the laid back kids will end up.

And yet mine and many others are in ivies, unhooked , and got into the "top" preK and elementary, and later magnet high school, based on testing with no tutor and no prep. Rose to the top. There are naturally intelligent , self-disciplined motivated and focused kids out there. The ivies are chock full of them. Why would any parent have their kid in a school they only could survive with tutoring?

+100

My unhooked kid is headed to an Ivy. You could tell from when he was little. We never tutored or test prepped and he was self-motivated—-but frankly never had to study or struggle like other kids.

Next we will be hearing about first chairs at MCYO who never practice. Please. There exist prodigies for sure, and I've met some. Nowhere close to fill top 5, much less top 20 schools.

The PP is speaking of not needing to study as much as other kids and being highly slef motivated at school not music prodigies. The ivies are filled with naturally bright students who sailed through high school without tutors and aced the SATs and APs in the hardest classes. The vast majority of them were absolutely standout 1-2 kids in their high schools, not counting the mega donors or athletes or other big hooks. Well over half there are unhooked and were superstars in their high school. The adjustment that most will just be around average at the ivy can be hard. It is a significant mental toll on some.

The brilliant kids I know study most of the time, typically more than average kids. However, they study much harder material, so they perform at a much higher level.

I know a kid who won a silver medal at IPHO as a HS sophomore. It's no secret that he studies all day long, he will tell you this. I don't think he has a tutor in an ordinary sense, but he certainly has a lot of support. You don't get to that level on your own, just like you are not winning the Menuhin by being self-taught.

So, yes, these kids don't need to study much to get a 5 at AP, but they need to study just as much to go beyond that.

I wish brilliant lazy kids were more sought after but I don't think this is the case.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like so many straight A students who were chief school newspaper editor, captain of a varsity sports team, volunteering, and more who can't even get to VA Tech. I don't know what people who get into schools like Michigan or the Ivy Leagues are doing in high school.

My daughter's friend who got into Yale was an Asian male with a very high wGPA who won Science Olympiad competitions and is an advanced string player.

Straight A doesn't mean anything, OP, you should know this. There is a world's difference between an A in a regular classs and an A in an AP class. Kids who get into the top colleges have 10+ APs, have a national level EC, etc. Your newpaper editing and team captainship worked a generation ago, but not today.

This is sounds exhausting. Kids have no time to be kids.

I am 44, and in my European country, high school was a stressful workathon culminating in one heck of a national exam week. I was so stressed out I couldn't eat on the first day of national exams. But that's nowhere near the worst. My cousins come from a country in Asia known for its teen suicide rate due to exam failure. Over there, when school ends for the day, the kids go to afternoon prep schools to cram. I know *elementary school kids* who had tutors to prepare for admission into the most prestigious afternoon prep schools!!! Separate from their regular school! HOW CRAZY IS THAT?!?

All to say: don't ever believe the US has it bad. I promise you, even for the kids who take grades seriously... it's still a layabout's paradise.

Huh? My NYC sibling had a tutor for her 2yo to prep for preschool admissions to get into the right preschool that would line up for the right elementary. That was over 20 years ago. She had two kids - one ended up graduating from Wash U and is unemployed. The other is at an Ivy.

One of my kids had a tutor by elementary. All had tutors in high school and SAT prep. All took multiple APs, as early as 9th grade. The thing about US education isn’t that it’s laid back - it’s that it’s very individual. It’s a huge country and getting into the top 10-15 schools is very hard - but no one will force you to do those things. There are a lot of less competitive options and that’s where most of the laid back kids will end up.

And yet mine and many others are in ivies, unhooked , and got into the "top" preK and elementary, and later magnet high school, based on testing with no tutor and no prep. Rose to the top. There are naturally intelligent , self-disciplined motivated and focused kids out there. The ivies are chock full of them. Why would any parent have their kid in a school they only could survive with tutoring?

+100

My unhooked kid is headed to an Ivy. You could tell from when he was little. We never tutored or test prepped and he was self-motivated—-but frankly never had to study or struggle like other kids.

Next we will be hearing about first chairs at MCYO who never practice. Please. There exist prodigies for sure, and I've met some. Nowhere close to fill top 5, much less top 20 schools.

The PP is speaking of not needing to study as much as other kids and being highly slef motivated at school not music prodigies. The ivies are filled with naturally bright students who sailed through high school without tutors and aced the SATs and APs in the hardest classes. The vast majority of them were absolutely standout 1-2 kids in their high schools, not counting the mega donors or athletes or other big hooks. Well over half there are unhooked and were superstars in their high school. The adjustment that most will just be around average at the ivy can be hard. It is a significant mental toll on some.

The brilliant kids I know study most of the time, typically more than average kids. However, they study much harder material, so they perform at a much higher level.

I know a kid who won a silver medal at IPHO as a HS sophomore. It's no secret that he studies all day long, he will tell you this. I don't think he has a tutor in an ordinary sense, but he certainly has a lot of support. You don't get to that level on your own, just like you are not winning the Menuhin by being self-taught.

So, yes, these kids don't need to study much to get a 5 at AP, but they need to study just as much to go beyond that.

I wish brilliant lazy kids were more sought after but I don't think this is the case.

Not in my house. It's funny--every year I told my sons when they were screwing around 'hey- next year you won't be able to do this, things are really going to ramp up'. I said this going into their private HS and every year...including 'Junior year is no joke. You aren't going to have time.' My husband always was telling them they weren't doing any of the study stuff for ACT blah, blah...

My youngest just said to me when I warned him about how hard Junior year was going to be "you always say that". Oldest graduate with straight As and is headed to an Ivy next year. Younger brother also has straight As and also 5s AP exams.

The older one does study more than the younger one ever has (barely see him study), but nothing compared to peers.

I am at a job with a huge amount of attrition because it is production based, critical thinking and a lot of writing. My friend's husband asked why I never work voluntary overtime to get stuff done and how do I have so much free time when his wife can barely hang on.

We have great memories in my family. We absorb info fast. Good critical thinking skills. Read fast, but thorough. High processing speed, etc.

At my dad's funeral (organic chemist), his friends were joking about my dad 'the party guy'. They said he would come into the lab and tell them ---get out, let's have some fun--while they struggled. They said 'that son-of-a-b*ch was a genius. Never had to study, etc.' lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Getting into the second tier schools like Mich really isn’t that hard. You just need the stats and scores. And you need to be strategic, know which regions and which schools the college likes the pull kids from. There are schools that have 3-4 kids accepted into Mich every year. This may not be where your HS sends kids. So figure out if they send kids to NYU or another school.

I disagree. Michigan routinely denies valedictorians

When I was in high school in the late 1980's, we heard that 80 percent of the applicants to Stanford were valedictorians. (I.e., don't bother applying if you're not one.) But at the time, Michigan was a top public university but not a place you needed to be a valedictorian with a 1400 SAT to get into. The competitiveness that used to exist just for the top 10 universities and the top 10 colleges has moved down the whole top 25 of each. I used to think of places like Davidson and Hamilton as safeties for people that couldn't get into Williams or Amherst, now you need top scores to get into them.