Sexual Assault By Uber Driver on Teen in DC

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a parent of teens and college age kids. We use Uber on occasion to help with driving. Those of you who judge, what are you expecting working parents to do exactly?? Kids need to get to & from school, jobs and activities. That means walking, metro and getting rides from us and sometimes Uber. We don't have family or any other "village" to help with driving so we do use Uber Teen when needed. With Uber Teen all the rides are tracked by us in real time, and we are typically on the phone with our kids too.
Walk a mile in my shoes.

I’m not criticizing, but I do think that if you are not a frequent Uber rider yourself, you do not appreciate how every so often you get a really bad driver - drives horribly, reeks of pot, acts strangely. You can minimize this by only chosing drivers rated above 4.95. Every driver I’ve ever had below 4.9 has something really wrong with them and/or their car. And for the girls especially, ensure they know how to be assertive and that they do not need to talk or answer questions, and that if they feel at ALL uncomfortable, end the ride.

You don’t think the boy felt uncomfortable and wanted to end the ride? You think that the ride just automatically ends?

Well the boy too of course, but as we know, women/girls are especially socialized to be “nice” and this can be taken advantage of.

To end the ride you tell the driver to let you out and end it on the app. If the child doesn’t know how to end the ride early, they shouldn’t be in the uber.

Yeah, that’ll stop the sexual assault!

In many cases an assault like this builds up as the offender “tests” the victim to see if they are vulnerable. So anyone taking an Uber should know how to end the ride early. Girls in particular should be taught to attune to their instincts and that they do not need to be “nice”
to strangers.

[Anonymous]

As sad as this situation is, the responses are illogical. Teens have also been assaulted at sleepovers, by extended family, at parties, and when running or walking on trails. And they can be shot at malls, movie theaters, and church.

Unless you keep your kid in a bubble, there are risks in life and you should teach them how to assess and manage those risks.

I’m fine with Uber Teen for DS and will be for DD when she’s a teen. But they also have self-defense training and pepper spray, and we talk frequently about how to manage situations like this.

You all need to empower your children more so that they are ready for life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As sad as this situation is, the responses are illogical. Teens have also been assaulted at sleepovers, by extended family, at parties, and when running or walking on trails. And they can be shot at malls, movie theaters, and church.

Unless you keep your kid in a bubble, there are risks in life and you should teach them how to assess and manage those risks.

I’m fine with Uber Teen for DS and will be for DD when she’s a teen. But they also have self-defense training and pepper spray, and we talk frequently about how to manage situations like this.

You all need to empower your children more so that they are ready for life.

They don’t need to be put in cars alone with a stranger to learn how to be empowered.
No teen should be running or walking on a trail alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As sad as this situation is, the responses are illogical. Teens have also been assaulted at sleepovers, by extended family, at parties, and when running or walking on trails. And they can be shot at malls, movie theaters, and church.

Unless you keep your kid in a bubble, there are risks in life and you should teach them how to assess and manage those risks.

I’m fine with Uber Teen for DS and will be for DD when she’s a teen. But they also have self-defense training and pepper spray, and we talk frequently about how to manage situations like this.

You all need to empower your children more so that they are ready for life.

Eh. I agree with not keeping kids in a bubble but I also don’t think they need to be locked in a moving vehicle with strange men until they are a little older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As sad as this situation is, the responses are illogical. Teens have also been assaulted at sleepovers, by extended family, at parties, and when running or walking on trails. And they can be shot at malls, movie theaters, and church.

Unless you keep your kid in a bubble, there are risks in life and you should teach them how to assess and manage those risks.

I’m fine with Uber Teen for DS and will be for DD when she’s a teen. But they also have self-defense training and pepper spray, and we talk frequently about how to manage situations like this.

You all need to empower your children more so that they are ready for life.

We all know there are risks and some are unavoidable. Riding in a car with a stranger is avoidable.

[Anonymous]

Here’s a practical question. I’ve taken Uber a lot and never had a weird experience. I don’t see how an Uber driver would touch me inappropriately. They are in the front seat and I am in the back. Are these creepy Uber drivers reaching over backwards while they are driving? Stopping the car? I’m just not understanding how this happens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a practical question. I’ve taken Uber a lot and never had a weird experience. I don’t see how an Uber driver would touch me inappropriately. They are in the front seat and I am in the back. Are these creepy Uber drivers reaching over backwards while they are driving? Stopping the car? I’m just not understanding how this happens.

Stop the car, assault you when you get out. Sometimes they assault drunk passengers. And of course as many women know, it may not be assault but other harassment like staring, invasive questions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a parent of teens and college age kids. We use Uber on occasion to help with driving. Those of you who judge, what are you expecting working parents to do exactly?? Kids need to get to & from school, jobs and activities. That means walking, metro and getting rides from us and sometimes Uber. We don't have family or any other "village" to help with driving so we do use Uber Teen when needed. With Uber Teen all the rides are tracked by us in real time, and we are typically on the phone with our kids too.
Walk a mile in my shoes.

I’m not criticizing, but I do think that if you are not a frequent Uber rider yourself, you do not appreciate how every so often you get a really bad driver - drives horribly, reeks of pot, acts strangely. You can minimize this by only chosing drivers rated above 4.95. Every driver I’ve ever had below 4.9 has something really wrong with them and/or their car. And for the girls especially, ensure they know how to be assertive and that they do not need to talk or answer questions, and that if they feel at ALL uncomfortable, end the ride.

You don’t think the boy felt uncomfortable and wanted to end the ride? You think that the ride just automatically ends?

Well the boy too of course, but as we know, women/girls are especially socialized to be “nice” and this can be taken advantage of.

To end the ride you tell the driver to let you out and end it on the app. If the child doesn’t know how to end the ride early, they shouldn’t be in the uber.

End the ride on the highway or end the ride in bad neighborhood, end the ride in pitch black middle of the night?? Okay.
You people are not rooted in reality, clearly have lived in an entitled bubble and have absolutely zero street smarts. Wow. And you are adults?! You are parents raising children?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a parent of teens and college age kids. We use Uber on occasion to help with driving. Those of you who judge, what are you expecting working parents to do exactly?? Kids need to get to & from school, jobs and activities. That means walking, metro and getting rides from us and sometimes Uber. We don't have family or any other "village" to help with driving so we do use Uber Teen when needed. With Uber Teen all the rides are tracked by us in real time, and we are typically on the phone with our kids too.
Walk a mile in my shoes.

I’m not criticizing, but I do think that if you are not a frequent Uber rider yourself, you do not appreciate how every so often you get a really bad driver - drives horribly, reeks of pot, acts strangely. You can minimize this by only chosing drivers rated above 4.95. Every driver I’ve ever had below 4.9 has something really wrong with them and/or their car. And for the girls especially, ensure they know how to be assertive and that they do not need to talk or answer questions, and that if they feel at ALL uncomfortable, end the ride.

You don’t think the boy felt uncomfortable and wanted to end the ride? You think that the ride just automatically ends?

Well the boy too of course, but as we know, women/girls are especially socialized to be “nice” and this can be taken advantage of.

To end the ride you tell the driver to let you out and end it on the app. If the child doesn’t know how to end the ride early, they shouldn’t be in the uber.

End the ride on the highway or end the ride in bad neighborhood, end the ride in pitch black middle of the night?? Okay.
You people are not rooted in reality, clearly have lived in an entitled bubble and have absolutely zero street smarts. Wow. And you are adults?! You are parents raising children?!

I’m not sure what you’re so mad about. Ending the ride in a “bad” neighborhood is better than staying in the car with a sketchy driver. So your kid should know how to do this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m shocked at how little sympathy there is in this thread for the Uber driver.

Obviously, no one would do this in a vacuum; the driver obviously suffered from some trauma and was likely the victim of childhood exploitation himself.

No one wants to be a criminal.

Agree. No one wants to be a criminal. Likely the Uber driver suffers from mental illness.

If society had provided the poor Uber driver with the wrap-around services he truly deserves and is entitled to, then his mental illness would never have driven him to commit this alleged situation.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a parent of teens and college age kids. We use Uber on occasion to help with driving. Those of you who judge, what are you expecting working parents to do exactly?? Kids need to get to & from school, jobs and activities. That means walking, metro and getting rides from us and sometimes Uber. We don't have family or any other "village" to help with driving so we do use Uber Teen when needed. With Uber Teen all the rides are tracked by us in real time, and we are typically on the phone with our kids too.
Walk a mile in my shoes.

I’m not criticizing, but I do think that if you are not a frequent Uber rider yourself, you do not appreciate how every so often you get a really bad driver - drives horribly, reeks of pot, acts strangely. You can minimize this by only chosing drivers rated above 4.95. Every driver I’ve ever had below 4.9 has something really wrong with them and/or their car. And for the girls especially, ensure they know how to be assertive and that they do not need to talk or answer questions, and that if they feel at ALL uncomfortable, end the ride.

You don’t think the boy felt uncomfortable and wanted to end the ride? You think that the ride just automatically ends?

Well the boy too of course, but as we know, women/girls are especially socialized to be “nice” and this can be taken advantage of.

To end the ride you tell the driver to let you out and end it on the app. If the child doesn’t know how to end the ride early, they shouldn’t be in the uber.

End the ride on the highway or end the ride in bad neighborhood, end the ride in pitch black middle of the night?? Okay.
You people are not rooted in reality, clearly have lived in an entitled bubble and have absolutely zero street smarts. Wow. And you are adults?! You are parents raising children?!

I’m not sure what you’re so mad about. Ending the ride in a “bad” neighborhood is better than staying in the car with a sketchy driver. So your kid should know how to do this.

Your lack of street smarts and comment sense is truly shocking. I’m not going to argue you with you, and I don’t mean to insult you but I promise you that are so way off with that line of thinking. Please don’t advise any young people of this. It’s absolutely horrific and dangerous advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a parent of teens and college age kids. We use Uber on occasion to help with driving. Those of you who judge, what are you expecting working parents to do exactly?? Kids need to get to & from school, jobs and activities. That means walking, metro and getting rides from us and sometimes Uber. We don't have family or any other "village" to help with driving so we do use Uber Teen when needed. With Uber Teen all the rides are tracked by us in real time, and we are typically on the phone with our kids too.
Walk a mile in my shoes.

I’m not criticizing, but I do think that if you are not a frequent Uber rider yourself, you do not appreciate how every so often you get a really bad driver - drives horribly, reeks of pot, acts strangely. You can minimize this by only chosing drivers rated above 4.95. Every driver I’ve ever had below 4.9 has something really wrong with them and/or their car. And for the girls especially, ensure they know how to be assertive and that they do not need to talk or answer questions, and that if they feel at ALL uncomfortable, end the ride.

You don’t think the boy felt uncomfortable and wanted to end the ride? You think that the ride just automatically ends?

Well the boy too of course, but as we know, women/girls are especially socialized to be “nice” and this can be taken advantage of.

To end the ride you tell the driver to let you out and end it on the app. If the child doesn’t know how to end the ride early, they shouldn’t be in the uber.

End the ride on the highway or end the ride in bad neighborhood, end the ride in pitch black middle of the night?? Okay.
You people are not rooted in reality, clearly have lived in an entitled bubble and have absolutely zero street smarts. Wow. And you are adults?! You are parents raising children?!

I’m not sure what you’re so mad about. Ending the ride in a “bad” neighborhood is better than staying in the car with a sketchy driver. So your kid should know how to do this.

Your lack of street smarts and comment sense is truly shocking. I’m not going to argue you with you, and I don’t mean to insult you but I promise you that are so way off with that line of thinking. Please don’t advise any young people of this. It’s absolutely horrific and dangerous advice.

?? What are you going on about? If you’re in an uber with a bad driver, you get out. I mean, not on the highway. But you get out and call another uber. Around here I doubt most teens taking ubers home are going through bad neighborhoods and in any event, you are safer in a “bad” neighborhood than with a crazy uber driver.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Uber is a shitty concept. Especially for teens. I get that the convenience is a new innovation for the suburbs, but a regulated public agency is the better way to go. Cities have been doing this forever.

If you choose to live in the suburbs, then you are deciding that you are willing to drive your kids around. If you don’t want that, move to the city.

The US really is a dystopian hell-scape.

Not sure what makes you say this as a response to this post. The poster is right. How do you think people do it in other countries, did it before Uber...?

You can’t be serious. Other countries that aren’t completely and utterly beholden to the auto industry use a combination of reliable public transportation (busses, trains, subways, trams), safe walking paths, and safe biking paths. Even outside of major cities!

I'm not from the US actually which is why I posted this. Yes, large cities are well-equipped. It's not the case if you live anywhere else. As someone from a rural area outside of a small town, I went nowhere as a teen unless my parents could take me. The small town only had buses (as most small towns do) and those required such long waits walking was better. But then again I had to be driven to that small town, or walk 1.5 hour to get there.

Fair enough, but allow me to point out that US suburbs are DECIDEDLY NOT “rural”, particularly suburbs of major cities such as anything in the Washington DC area. There is zero reason why we can’t have infrastructure for people (including teens and kids) to get around efficiently without using cars.

I’m the PP who made the suburban/city comparison. I’m not sure we are in agreement on the outcome (pro or anti Uber) but I do agree with what you said here. I suppose we can have more public infrastructure to be less car dependent here (though everyone moving here knew what they were getting: a totally car dependent lifestyle.) But it needs to be a tightly regulated public agency and NOT a private corporation.

My kid is not getting in a Uber alone. And I grew up taking cabs along with other modes of public transportation. The point being: cabs were regulated public transportation.

Ubers are regulated just as tightly.

[Anonymous]

Wouldn’t uber/lyft be more safe than a cab? Uber and lyft both driver and passenger are tracked real time on their phones. I assume in this sad situation, the driver was caught close to immediately. Vs when I have taken a cab (which was plenty in my youth as I am in my 50s), I never wrote down the cab number.

Bad situations can happen anywhere and I am so sorry for the OP’s friend’s son.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As sad as this situation is, the responses are illogical. Teens have also been assaulted at sleepovers, by extended family, at parties, and when running or walking on trails. And they can be shot at malls, movie theaters, and church.

Unless you keep your kid in a bubble, there are risks in life and you should teach them how to assess and manage those risks.

I’m fine with Uber Teen for DS and will be for DD when she’s a teen. But they also have self-defense training and pepper spray, and we talk frequently about how to manage situations like this.

You all need to empower your children more so that they are ready for life.

Eh. I agree with not keeping kids in a bubble but I also don’t think they need to be locked in a moving vehicle with strange men until they are a little older.

+1. Some PPs have completely lost the plot. You can gain independence and be ready for life without being sent alone in a car with a strange, unvetted dude to drive you half way across town with no access to help. WTF is wrong with parents? I'd rather my kid walk wherever they were going than Uber.