If you have a top student who chose GMU, how did you get over the comments/looks?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't read all of the responses but just got my first response from a parent today looking down on my kid going to UMD. She chose UMD from many others (including selective SLACs) for very similar reasons your DC chose GMU. It feels shitty but proud of our smart kids who know themselves and made the best choices for them.

I was getting these kind of comments all last summer (2023 grad). One of these people had a kid rejected from UMD this cycle. Karma.

The shyt talkers always stem from hate and jealousy- that is all you need to know to not spend time around them, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is JMU there lol
GMU and JMU are at the same level.
GMU is in better location.[/quote]

Not for kids that grew up here. Most kids don’t want to go to college where they grew up. Especially if it’s Fairfax County we are talking about. GMU even acknowledges its commuter school rep on its website. Not that I think OP’s kid isn’t making the right decision. He sounds very smart.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS is a top student. 1580 SAT. Also took ACT and scored 35. He was accepted to all the schools he applied to and he did not apply to many: GMU, Pitt, VaTech, JMU, VCU, UMD, and WPI. He wants to choose GMU Honors for (1) cost savings and (2) location. We live maybe 35 minutes away. He will live on campus. He can see us every day or never, it's up to him. He has ADHD. He likes his therapist and doesn't want to lose her, he doesn't want to worry about access to his meds, and he takes solace in us being near just in case he needs support. The problem is everyone thinks he is throwing his talent away and they look down on him for his choice. I've heard his friends tease him about it. Many chose UVA, VATech, JMU. W&M. I am proud of him for choosing what is best for him. How do I help him be comfortable and confident in his decision?

Let me make myself clear.
You are the problem.

A student should go to the best school for them who gives a shit about others.

Now if you said your kid was going to liberty or Hillsdale or some religious shit education then sure there is a place for ridicule but in this case no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is a top student. 1580 SAT. Also took ACT and scored 35. He was accepted to all the schools he applied to and he did not apply to many: GMU, Pitt, VaTech, JMU, VCU, UMD, and WPI. He wants to choose GMU Honors for (1) cost savings and (2) location. We live maybe 35 minutes away. He will live on campus. He can see us every day or never, it's up to him. He has ADHD. He likes his therapist and doesn't want to lose her, he doesn't want to worry about access to his meds, and he takes solace in us being near just in case he needs support. The problem is everyone thinks he is throwing his talent away and they look down on him for his choice. I've heard his friends tease him about it. Many chose UVA, VATech, JMU. W&M. I am proud of him for choosing what is best for him. How do I help him be comfortable and confident in his decision?

Let me make myself clear.
You are the problem.

A student should go to the best school for them who gives a shit about others.

Now if you said your kid was going to liberty or Hillsdale or some religious shit education then sure there is a place for ridicule but in this case no.

I imagine you are mocked and ridiculed daily for being a garbage human being...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lot's and lot's of therapy. They are 26 and I just now am able to leave the house. It was shameful for many many years that I could not state that my kid didn't go to a T20, I would be shunned at the country and yacht clubs, friends disowned us. I mean Mason wasn't even a President, just a lowly congressman. At least UVA was founded by a President and JMU is named after one. Have you seen Gunston Hall in Lorton? So tiny.. shame will forever be with my family.

I too struggled like you. I finally learned to cope by winking, raising the pinky on my cosmo glass and in my best yacht club accent coyly say with a head cock and inquisitive look "Who? Oh, he goes to a 3 letter Virginia University founded by a well established Founding Father"... to wit, I always get the "GO HOOS, f@#k Tech response. 50% of the time it works all the time.

You two are such an inspiration. As a current GMU parent, I can only hope that one day I too may be able to move on with my life as you so courageously have. Kudos!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is a top student. 1580 SAT. Also took ACT and scored 35. He was accepted to all the schools he applied to and he did not apply to many: GMU, Pitt, VaTech, JMU, VCU, UMD, and WPI. He wants to choose GMU Honors for (1) cost savings and (2) location. We live maybe 35 minutes away. He will live on campus. He can see us every day or never, it's up to him. He has ADHD. He likes his therapist and doesn't want to lose her, he doesn't want to worry about access to his meds, and he takes solace in us being near just in case he needs support. The problem is everyone thinks he is throwing his talent away and they look down on him for his choice. I've heard his friends tease him about it. Many chose UVA, VATech, JMU. W&M. I am proud of him for choosing what is best for him. How do I help him be comfortable and confident in his decision?

I think that GMU is really the equivalent of a UK “plate glass university,” like the University of Warwick. It’s a top school in a top location. Nothing to be ashamed of at all.

WTH?? The University of Warwick is nothing like GMU — I went there. It certainly is not in a top location and it is very self-contained. Sinfully ugly, but one of the best universities in the UK. GMU is a suburban school and it’s fine. Nothing against it, but couldn’t be more different than Warwick.

0.
And [b]GMU is rapidly becoming one of the best U.S. research universities in the United States[/b]. It’s just new, not bad.

please don't keep saying this - it makes you sound a bit delusional. people have been trying to make this happen for at least 25 years. The biggest bump the school has received was when the mens basketball team made it to the final 4 in the ncaa tournament in 2006 (and that's still a crown jewel achievement for the school).

+1. There a continuum here. GMU is a good school and OP’s son will do well there. No, it is most certainly not becoming one of the best research universities in the US. No one is confusing it for JHU, UPenn, or UMich. Literally, nobody.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS is a top student. 1580 SAT. Also took ACT and scored 35. He was accepted to all the schools he applied to and he did not apply to many: GMU, Pitt, VaTech, JMU, VCU, UMD, and WPI. He wants to choose GMU Honors for (1) cost savings and (2) location. We live maybe 35 minutes away. He will live on campus. He can see us every day or never, it's up to him. He has ADHD. He likes his therapist and doesn't want to lose her, he doesn't want to worry about access to his meds, and he takes solace in us being near just in case he needs support. The problem is everyone thinks he is throwing his talent away and they look down on him for his choice. I've heard his friends tease him about it. Many chose UVA, VATech, JMU. W&M. I am proud of him for choosing what is best for him. How do I help him be comfortable and confident in his decision?

Unless people giving comments and looks plan to help me with tuition, I'd ignore it all and wouldn't lose any sleep over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lot's and lot's of therapy. They are 26 and I just now am able to leave the house. It was shameful for many many years that I could not state that my kid didn't go to a T20, I would be shunned at the country and yacht clubs, friends disowned us. I mean Mason wasn't even a President, just a lowly congressman. At least UVA was founded by a President and JMU is named after one. Have you seen Gunston Hall in Lorton? So tiny.. shame will forever be with my family.

I too struggled like you. I finally learned to cope by winking, raising the pinky on my cosmo glass and in my best yacht club accent coyly say with a head cock and inquisitive look "Who? Oh, he goes to a 3 letter Virginia University founded by a well established Founding Father"... to wit, I always get the "GO HOOS, f@#k Tech response. 50% of the time it works all the time.

You two are such an inspiration. As a current GMU parent, I can only hope that one day I too may be able to move on with my life as you so courageously have. Kudos!

There is hope, I wish you well!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't read all of the responses but just got my first response from a parent today looking down on my kid going to UMD. She chose UMD from many others (including selective SLACs) for very similar reasons your DC chose GMU. It feels shitty but proud of our smart kids who know themselves and made the best choices for them.

That's crazy! I'd kill for my kid to go to UMD. Show them this Forbes article - https://www.forbes.com/sites/emmawhitford/2024/04/29/exclusive-employers-are-souring-on-ivy-league-grads-while-these-20-new-ivies-ascend/?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR1QB3fSEavd7YKPhw2wNHW26kS_II8QxVx34FOXLM2om7_2X5XuD0Y3PC8_aem_ATbuJ1DwSycI6qfXqqitVOSbNaFUrIACg4hxzq6VLLhC_akATScpdHK_d17ZzzOjKL8R_XHBlh2O3bY9dLDIA6B5&mibextid=xfxF2i

UMD is listed as a public "new Ivy"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He’s missing a chance to grow and stretch his wings. He should pick VT.

Yes because the middle of nowhere in Blacksburg is where wings are spread, not a hub of a major U.S. city like Washington, DC.

[Anonymous]

Congrats to your kid who knows what he needs/wants at this point! Trusting yourself is a long process also good for him. I think keep reinforcing this.

And, good for you to stay supportive and not getting caught up in ranking silliness. I wish I’d been quicker to realize this for my kid who said no to some “selective highly ranked” schools for a great school. I kept asking are you sure etc…I finally got the message that my questions were not helpful. So again, congrats.

I’ll add that a few years in and my kid was right- mt kid’s choice has been a great fir! Good luck!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:23.21 PP again.. An unrelated question.. How does his ADHD manifest itself if he's doing so well academically? I suspect with a 1580 SAT he also has a high weighted GPA.. Also, what does he plan on studying?

Thank you everyone for your kind responses. Sometimes DCUM can be hit or miss, and I just brace myself.

To answer, his ADHD manifests itself in his really poor executive functioning and hyperactivity. He's also highly distractable. He has an EF coach who he has had since 7th grade and his needs have changed over time, of course, but his ADHD makes his EF age about 14 years old. Luckily he was blessed with a high IQ and huge (and sometimes unhealthy) dose of perfectionism. He had a 504 all through HS and was approved for accommodations at GMU. He plans to major in computer science with a minor in physics.

I know this is a very old post, but hoping I could get some feedback from the 23.21 poster above.

DS was just admitted to GMU CEC from the waitlist, with plans to major in Computer Science/software engineering. Stats are similar to your kid, super high IQ and intellectually strong, but with ADHD inattentive and very poor executive functioning. We really like GMU's Executive Functioning Program and understand that their learning supports are very strong. I am convinced he will need such supports to be successful in college

We want to get some insight from others who have worked with their disability services office. How was your son's first year and more importantly, what has been your experience with GMU's learning supports?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:23.21 PP again.. An unrelated question.. How does his ADHD manifest itself if he's doing so well academically? I suspect with a 1580 SAT he also has a high weighted GPA.. Also, what does he plan on studying?

Thank you everyone for your kind responses. Sometimes DCUM can be hit or miss, and I just brace myself.

To answer, his ADHD manifests itself in his really poor executive functioning and hyperactivity. He's also highly distractable. He has an EF coach who he has had since 7th grade and his needs have changed over time, of course, but his ADHD makes his EF age about 14 years old. Luckily he was blessed with a high IQ and huge (and sometimes unhealthy) dose of perfectionism. He had a 504 all through HS and was approved for accommodations at GMU. He plans to major in computer science with a minor in physics.

I know this is a very old post, but hoping I could get some feedback from the 23.21 poster above.

DS was just admitted to GMU CEC from the waitlist, with plans to major in Computer Science/software engineering. Stats are similar to your kid, super high IQ and intellectually strong, but with ADHD inattentive and very poor executive functioning. We really like GMU's Executive Functioning Program and understand that their learning supports are very strong. I am convinced he will need such supports to be successful in college

We want to get some insight from others who have worked with their disability services office. How was your son's first year and more importantly, what has been your experience with GMU's learning supports?

I teach at GMU and I think the learning supports are very good. But we are a large university and right now the various supports are not centralized. This is being worked on. My advice is for you and your child to gather as much info (names, websites, contact info) as you can on learning supports and put them all in a Google doc. You or they can add to it if you hear about a support that you were not previously aware of. A lot of us professors provide info on supports in our syllabi, but sometimes we even miss things because it’s not all housed in one place online or physically. Tell your child that learning supports aren’t just for students who are struggling or have a disability (except for Office of Disability Services, of course). They can be used by everyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:23.21 PP again.. An unrelated question.. How does his ADHD manifest itself if he's doing so well academically? I suspect with a 1580 SAT he also has a high weighted GPA.. Also, what does he plan on studying?

Thank you everyone for your kind responses. Sometimes DCUM can be hit or miss, and I just brace myself.

To answer, his ADHD manifests itself in his really poor executive functioning and hyperactivity. He's also highly distractable. He has an EF coach who he has had since 7th grade and his needs have changed over time, of course, but his ADHD makes his EF age about 14 years old. Luckily he was blessed with a high IQ and huge (and sometimes unhealthy) dose of perfectionism. He had a 504 all through HS and was approved for accommodations at GMU. He plans to major in computer science with a minor in physics.

I know this is a very old post, but hoping I could get some feedback from the 23.21 poster above.

DS was just admitted to GMU CEC from the waitlist, with plans to major in Computer Science/software engineering. Stats are similar to your kid, super high IQ and intellectually strong, but with ADHD inattentive and very poor executive functioning. We really like GMU's Executive Functioning Program and understand that their learning supports are very strong. I am convinced he will need such supports to be successful in college

We want to get some insight from others who have worked with their disability services office. How was your son's first year and more importantly, what has been your experience with GMU's learning supports?

I teach at GMU and I think the learning supports are very good. But we are a large university and right now the various supports are not centralized. This is being worked on. My advice is for you and your child to gather as much info (names, websites, contact info) as you can on learning supports and put them all in a Google doc. You or they can add to it if you hear about a support that you were not previously aware of. A lot of us professors provide info on supports in our syllabi, but sometimes we even miss things because it’s not all housed in one place online or physically. Tell your child that learning supports aren’t just for students who are struggling or have a disability (except for Office of Disability Services, of course). They can be used by everyone.

This is very helpful, thank you. He committed to another school back in April, which is much smaller and doesn't have specialized programs like EFP and MASI at GMU. A key question is whether a small school, further away, with standard accommodations available, would be a better environment than a large school with specific programs and a strong reputation for learning supports. GMU's CS program is far superior, especially when including opportunities for internships.

Interestingly, the real stumbling block from my kid's perspective is first-year housing. He has rather severe OCD around contamination, and hates the idea of a communal bathroom which I believe all GMU's first-year dorms have. The other school is known for its really nice dorms, including suite-style setup in first-year housing. I read that a single could be possible as part of his accommodations.

We asked him yesterday that all else being equal, if the GMU dorms were like the dorms at the other school, would he choose GMU? Without hesitation, he said "yes".

[Anonymous]

Welp, DS chose GMU! It was his choice but I’m not gonna lie, this is what we believed was best for him.