What are the most common ways women waste their 20s?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying right after college is cool and smart. You should be in that mentality.

Sleeping around aka "dating" around is gross, unhealthy, and leads to mental despair.

Your laptop, PowerPoint, Excel, email job is not actually important.

Stop being an alcoholic.

Traveling is a time and money sink.

Definitely an incel thread now

It speaks to your immaturity you think this is some edgy insult. There's nothing wrong with single young men and women being celibate. That sort of purity, restraint and impulse control in 2023 is commendable.

….do you know what the “in” stands for?

I looked it up. Involuntary. Got it. You can't think for yourself, so you're trying to cyberbully people with trendy made up buzzwords you've been force fed? And the cusp of the bullying revolves around not sleeping around? Sorry but you sound immoral and lost. Sleeping around only leads to disease, baggage, a bad reputation, and mental distress.

Well it’s clear whatever you did didn’t exactly lead to tremendous personal or personality success.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying right after college is cool and smart. You should be in that mentality.

Sleeping around aka "dating" around is gross, unhealthy, and leads to mental despair.

Your laptop, PowerPoint, Excel, email job is not actually important.

Stop being an alcoholic.

Traveling is a time and money sink.

Your first two statements are harsh with a grain of truth and the third is definitely true.

The last statement.... I couldn't possibly disagree more. Travel early and often. Cheaply if you can. Apply for internships, stipends, study abroad, fellowships, short term jobs, ANYTHING and travel to far flung places in the world FOR FREE or cheaply. This is something you can basically only do in your 20s. Travel, travel, travel! Especially when the pandemic hit, I thanked all the stars that I said "YES" to so many opportunities when I was young. Because you never know what can happen. Pandemics, politics, kids, jobs, money. Adult problems. Use your youth to travel. Get lost on a city's public transit system, stay in a hostel, fumble around in a foreign language. Have adventures, DO IT!!!

Traveling while single (before marriage and babies) is a crutch to avoid reality, waste time, binge drink, eat tourist food, and waste money. Squandering your 20s away being a brainless consumer, seeking likes on instagram. Pointless.

You want to travel, do it in college, study abroad, and if you pursue an MBA, go ahead and take those trips with classmates. But these white collar women age 25 to 35 who think traveling is a personality or a substitute for a husband and kids are lost.

Well, maybe fore you. For many of us, it's a way to learn languages, build an international network, visit the Louvre and the Sistine Chapel, learn how to make sushi in Japan, cycle around Taiwan on innovative electric bamboo bikes, dance samba in Brazil with some of the most talented musicians on the planet, see India's Hyderabad transform itself into a global cyber hub from dust, and learn how to turn on every type of shower handle imaginable. Among other things.

And no, I didn't post any of that on Facebook or Instagram.

Unless you’re in the state department, you’re spinning yarn. A “network” of random hookups and passport stamps you think are social currency. When everyone your age is talking about their tween kids and you’re talking about trips, you look ridiculous. Sorry, just being frank.

Idk but if I’m at a party I would rather hear about their experiences trekking in Kyrgyzstan than about Larla’s band recital.

Sure sure. And everyone just loves the "cool" wine aunt (actually, they all secretly feel sorry for her).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's interesting that a lot of the advice is contradictory: "date lots of different people" and "sleep with the hot guy", vs. "only date for marriage" and marry the good guy while you're young.

I think it depends how much you want to get married. For some women it's their main goal in life; others can take it or leave it, especially now that women have more economic opportunities and single motherhood is not so stigmatized.

The reality is that the older you get the wider the discrepancies between being married and not, and never-married people as well as most divorcées will never enjoy the lifestyle, comfort or peace of mind that most married people do.

[Anonymous]

Invest in assets and not things. Assets accumulate value. Things do not. Get on the real estate ladder as early as possible by any means necessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t work in a female dominated industry. The pay is low and you won’t meet marriageable men. Upskill or go back to school if you have to but you meet a lot of marriageable men at work at that age if you’re working in the good industries.

Meh. My friend earning 6 figures as a specialized nurse practitioner would prob disagree. This is weird advice and don't try to meet people at work. (I work in a male-dominated industry, fwiw)

Her work context probably includes a few doctors?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying right after college is cool and smart. You should be in that mentality.

Sleeping around aka "dating" around is gross, unhealthy, and leads to mental despair.

Your laptop, PowerPoint, Excel, email job is not actually important.

Stop being an alcoholic.

Traveling is a time and money sink.

Your first two statements are harsh with a grain of truth and the third is definitely true.

The last statement.... I couldn't possibly disagree more. Travel early and often. Cheaply if you can. Apply for internships, stipends, study abroad, fellowships, short term jobs, ANYTHING and travel to far flung places in the world FOR FREE or cheaply. This is something you can basically only do in your 20s. Travel, travel, travel! Especially when the pandemic hit, I thanked all the stars that I said "YES" to so many opportunities when I was young. Because you never know what can happen. Pandemics, politics, kids, jobs, money. Adult problems. Use your youth to travel. Get lost on a city's public transit system, stay in a hostel, fumble around in a foreign language. Have adventures, DO IT!!!

Traveling while single (before marriage and babies) is a crutch to avoid reality, waste time, binge drink, eat tourist food, and waste money. Squandering your 20s away being a brainless consumer, seeking likes on instagram. Pointless.

You want to travel, do it in college, study abroad, and if you pursue an MBA, go ahead and take those trips with classmates. But these white collar women age 25 to 35 who think traveling is a personality or a substitute for a husband and kids are lost.

Well, maybe fore you. For many of us, it's a way to learn languages, build an international network, visit the Louvre and the Sistine Chapel, learn how to make sushi in Japan, cycle around Taiwan on innovative electric bamboo bikes, dance samba in Brazil with some of the most talented musicians on the planet, see India's Hyderabad transform itself into a global cyber hub from dust, and learn how to turn on every type of shower handle imaginable. Among other things.

And no, I didn't post any of that on Facebook or Instagram.

Unless you’re in the state department, you’re spinning yarn. A “network” of random hookups and passport stamps you think are social currency. When everyone your age is talking about their tween kids and you’re talking about trips, you look ridiculous. Sorry, just being frank.

Idk but if I’m at a party I would rather hear about their experiences trekking in Kyrgyzstan than about Larla’s band recital.

Sure sure. And everyone just loves the "cool" wine aunt (actually, they all secretly feel sorry for her).

Should women be allowed to work? Vote?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying right after college is cool and smart. You should be in that mentality.

Sleeping around aka "dating" around is gross, unhealthy, and leads to mental despair.

Your laptop, PowerPoint, Excel, email job is not actually important.

Stop being an alcoholic.

Traveling is a time and money sink.

Your first two statements are harsh with a grain of truth and the third is definitely true.

The last statement.... I couldn't possibly disagree more. Travel early and often. Cheaply if you can. Apply for internships, stipends, study abroad, fellowships, short term jobs, ANYTHING and travel to far flung places in the world FOR FREE or cheaply. This is something you can basically only do in your 20s. Travel, travel, travel! Especially when the pandemic hit, I thanked all the stars that I said "YES" to so many opportunities when I was young. Because you never know what can happen. Pandemics, politics, kids, jobs, money. Adult problems. Use your youth to travel. Get lost on a city's public transit system, stay in a hostel, fumble around in a foreign language. Have adventures, DO IT!!!

Traveling while single (before marriage and babies) is a crutch to avoid reality, waste time, binge drink, eat tourist food, and waste money. Squandering your 20s away being a brainless consumer, seeking likes on instagram. Pointless.

You want to travel, do it in college, study abroad, and if you pursue an MBA, go ahead and take those trips with classmates. But these white collar women age 25 to 35 who think traveling is a personality or a substitute for a husband and kids are lost.

Well, maybe fore you. For many of us, it's a way to learn languages, build an international network, visit the Louvre and the Sistine Chapel, learn how to make sushi in Japan, cycle around Taiwan on innovative electric bamboo bikes, dance samba in Brazil with some of the most talented musicians on the planet, see India's Hyderabad transform itself into a global cyber hub from dust, and learn how to turn on every type of shower handle imaginable. Among other things.

And no, I didn't post any of that on Facebook or Instagram.

You can do all of that with your then boyfriend, now husband who you married in your mid to late 20s in the years before you have kids, if you want them! Don’t see why people keep saying “I couldn’t settle down, I wanted to ~travel~” as though they’re mutually exclusive.

+1 Because it’s a cope, a defense mechanism. They’re “traveling” to drown out the sheer boredom and lack of fulfillment in their life.

Not when men do it, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying right after college is cool and smart. You should be in that mentality.

Sleeping around aka "dating" around is gross, unhealthy, and leads to mental despair.

Your laptop, PowerPoint, Excel, email job is not actually important.

Stop being an alcoholic.

Traveling is a time and money sink.

Your first two statements are harsh with a grain of truth and the third is definitely true.

The last statement.... I couldn't possibly disagree more. Travel early and often. Cheaply if you can. Apply for internships, stipends, study abroad, fellowships, short term jobs, ANYTHING and travel to far flung places in the world FOR FREE or cheaply. This is something you can basically only do in your 20s. Travel, travel, travel! Especially when the pandemic hit, I thanked all the stars that I said "YES" to so many opportunities when I was young. Because you never know what can happen. Pandemics, politics, kids, jobs, money. Adult problems. Use your youth to travel. Get lost on a city's public transit system, stay in a hostel, fumble around in a foreign language. Have adventures, DO IT!!!

Traveling while single (before marriage and babies) is a crutch to avoid reality, waste time, binge drink, eat tourist food, and waste money. Squandering your 20s away being a brainless consumer, seeking likes on instagram. Pointless.

You want to travel, do it in college, study abroad, and if you pursue an MBA, go ahead and take those trips with classmates. But these white collar women age 25 to 35 who think traveling is a personality or a substitute for a husband and kids are lost.

Wow. Just wow. You think women (not men, apparently) only exist to be wives and breed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) Education. Spend your valuable time in building up your educational and career credentials.

2) Self-care. Get the mental therapy, the laser treatment, the makeover, fix your teeth/skin/hair, exercise and become fit.

3) Be accessible not Easy. Date extensively and don't say "no" to anyone when they ask you out, at least for the 1 date. Do not have sex until your 8th date at the very minimum or for 3 months. Yes, that will eliminate the men who only want to use you. Pay for your share of the date. Go in your own car. Protect your health, safety, reputation, heart and wallet.

4) Organize mixers, get togethers, meet ups, reunions. You need to cast a wider net and expand your circle. After that, you need to nurture your expanding social circle too.

5) Make sure you have an event or two to go to every weekend. Check out the museum, check out the new play, attend a party, take a pottery class. If a prospective date calls you, you can invite them along. You need to surround yourself with people your age and be doing things. That way, you have never ever wasted a weekend (even if your date turned out a dud).

6) Travel a lot. Travel in groups.

7) Dress the part of the SES you want to belong to. Not in terms of expensive clothes, but in terms of style of clothing. Look well groomed and cute.

8) No to having pets. Yes, to pet-sitting occasionally.

9) Save your money and invest in retirement. You must understand what you are bringing to the table is a big factor in attracting the best spouse.

10) Be a warm and nice person. No one likes drama llama, gossipy or bittchy woman. Do not be an unpleasant person, do not be a doormat. Have goals for yourselves regarding education, HHI, career, health, social circle, hobbies - that you meet yourself.

11) Curate your Social Media. Make it inoffensive, innocuous, fun, varied, appropriate, PG-13 and interesting. Have a lag of a week before you post. Don't be posting your pics all the time. Make it mostly about places, things, activities.

12) Date to marry. You do not need to sleep with anyone you do not feel you can marry.

13) If you are going to have sex, use condom and ask for a health checkup first.

14) Do not move in without an engagement ring.

15) Do not move in together if you are less than 32 yrs old.

16) Engagement should last between 9 -12 months. ie the time it takes to plan and execute a wedding.

17) Focus on getting married instead of having a large wedding.

18) "No relationship, no sex - if the end game is not marriage." You may think that this will repel men. You are mistaken.

If a career woman who is social, self-sufficient, career driven, well educated, making good $$$, good looking, dating extensively (accessible not easy) and in a well paying job has the above standard or condition - it will bring eager to marry, good catch men in droves.

Marry in your 20s. Be DINKs for a while. Only when you think that your partner will be a fantastic dad should you have kids in your early 30s.

Have a prenup that is valid only until you have kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying right after college is cool and smart. You should be in that mentality.

Sleeping around aka "dating" around is gross, unhealthy, and leads to mental despair.

Your laptop, PowerPoint, Excel, email job is not actually important.

Stop being an alcoholic.

Traveling is a time and money sink.

Your first two statements are harsh with a grain of truth and the third is definitely true.

The last statement.... I couldn't possibly disagree more. Travel early and often. Cheaply if you can. Apply for internships, stipends, study abroad, fellowships, short term jobs, ANYTHING and travel to far flung places in the world FOR FREE or cheaply. This is something you can basically only do in your 20s. Travel, travel, travel! Especially when the pandemic hit, I thanked all the stars that I said "YES" to so many opportunities when I was young. Because you never know what can happen. Pandemics, politics, kids, jobs, money. Adult problems. Use your youth to travel. Get lost on a city's public transit system, stay in a hostel, fumble around in a foreign language. Have adventures, DO IT!!!

Traveling while single (before marriage and babies) is a crutch to avoid reality, waste time, binge drink, eat tourist food, and waste money. Squandering your 20s away being a brainless consumer, seeking likes on instagram. Pointless.

You want to travel, do it in college, study abroad, and if you pursue an MBA, go ahead and take those trips with classmates. But these white collar women age 25 to 35 who think traveling is a personality or a substitute for a husband and kids are lost.

Well, maybe fore you. For many of us, it's a way to learn languages, build an international network, visit the Louvre and the Sistine Chapel, learn how to make sushi in Japan, cycle around Taiwan on innovative electric bamboo bikes, dance samba in Brazil with some of the most talented musicians on the planet, see India's Hyderabad transform itself into a global cyber hub from dust, and learn how to turn on every type of shower handle imaginable. Among other things.

And no, I didn't post any of that on Facebook or Instagram.

Unless you’re in the state department, you’re spinning yarn. A “network” of random hookups and passport stamps you think are social currency. When everyone your age is talking about their tween kids and you’re talking about trips, you look ridiculous. Sorry, just being frank.

Idk but if I’m at a party I would rather hear about their experiences trekking in Kyrgyzstan than about Larla’s band recital.

Sure sure. And everyone just loves the "cool" wine aunt (actually, they all secretly feel sorry for her).

I mean it varies. Some people find “epic” travel stories to be pretentious, other people think incessant taking about one’s kids to be boring. And I love my cool triathlete aunt who is childless (not be choice, sadly) who raises German Shepherds. My hunch is that more than one mommy in the hypothetical group appreciates the escapism of the Kyrgyzstan trekking stories as a break from all the Larlo, Larla, Larleigh extracurricular one-upsmanship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying right after college is cool and smart. You should be in that mentality.

Sleeping around aka "dating" around is gross, unhealthy, and leads to mental despair.

Your laptop, PowerPoint, Excel, email job is not actually important.

Stop being an alcoholic.

Traveling is a time and money sink.

Your first two statements are harsh with a grain of truth and the third is definitely true.

The last statement.... I couldn't possibly disagree more. Travel early and often. Cheaply if you can. Apply for internships, stipends, study abroad, fellowships, short term jobs, ANYTHING and travel to far flung places in the world FOR FREE or cheaply. This is something you can basically only do in your 20s. Travel, travel, travel! Especially when the pandemic hit, I thanked all the stars that I said "YES" to so many opportunities when I was young. Because you never know what can happen. Pandemics, politics, kids, jobs, money. Adult problems. Use your youth to travel. Get lost on a city's public transit system, stay in a hostel, fumble around in a foreign language. Have adventures, DO IT!!!

Traveling while single (before marriage and babies) is a crutch to avoid reality, waste time, binge drink, eat tourist food, and waste money. Squandering your 20s away being a brainless consumer, seeking likes on instagram. Pointless.

You want to travel, do it in college, study abroad, and if you pursue an MBA, go ahead and take those trips with classmates. But these white collar women age 25 to 35 who think traveling is a personality or a substitute for a husband and kids are lost.

Well, maybe fore you. For many of us, it's a way to learn languages, build an international network, visit the Louvre and the Sistine Chapel, learn how to make sushi in Japan, cycle around Taiwan on innovative electric bamboo bikes, dance samba in Brazil with some of the most talented musicians on the planet, see India's Hyderabad transform itself into a global cyber hub from dust, and learn how to turn on every type of shower handle imaginable. Among other things.

And no, I didn't post any of that on Facebook or Instagram.

Unless you’re in the state department, you’re spinning yarn. A “network” of random hookups and passport stamps you think are social currency. When everyone your age is talking about their tween kids and you’re talking about trips, you look ridiculous. Sorry, just being frank.

Idk but if I’m at a party I would rather hear about their experiences trekking in Kyrgyzstan than about Larla’s band recital.

Sure sure. And everyone just loves the "cool" wine aunt (actually, they all secretly feel sorry for her).

I mean it varies. Some people find “epic” travel stories to be pretentious, other people think incessant taking about one’s kids to be boring. And I love my cool triathlete aunt who is childless (not be choice, sadly) who raises German Shepherds. My hunch is that more than one mommy in the hypothetical group appreciates the escapism of the Kyrgyzstan trekking stories as a break from all the Larlo, Larla, Larleigh extracurricular one-upsmanship.

I LOVE my childless friends. I love them for themselves, but also deeply appreciate how much they have to give because they aren’t burdened by their own kids. They sustained me through the difficult early parenthood years when they could visit with ease. I love my mom friends too, but my “wine aunt” friends are gold. Anyway women’s value is not defined by their status as wives and mothers, in case that needs to be said.

[Anonymous]

Let’s face it: there is no bigger threat than single, childfree, educated women. Why do you think Tucker Carlson is telling that group to get married?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t marry or have kids if you’re a woman. It’s a raw deal and women are waking up to it.

Eh. If you marry well and can afford help, then and either SAHM or keep your career if you love that, you can have it all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying right after college is cool and smart. You should be in that mentality.

Sleeping around aka "dating" around is gross, unhealthy, and leads to mental despair.

Your laptop, PowerPoint, Excel, email job is not actually important.

Stop being an alcoholic.

Traveling is a time and money sink.

Your first two statements are harsh with a grain of truth and the third is definitely true.

The last statement.... I couldn't possibly disagree more. Travel early and often. Cheaply if you can. Apply for internships, stipends, study abroad, fellowships, short term jobs, ANYTHING and travel to far flung places in the world FOR FREE or cheaply. This is something you can basically only do in your 20s. Travel, travel, travel! Especially when the pandemic hit, I thanked all the stars that I said "YES" to so many opportunities when I was young. Because you never know what can happen. Pandemics, politics, kids, jobs, money. Adult problems. Use your youth to travel. Get lost on a city's public transit system, stay in a hostel, fumble around in a foreign language. Have adventures, DO IT!!!

Traveling while single (before marriage and babies) is a crutch to avoid reality, waste time, binge drink, eat tourist food, and waste money. Squandering your 20s away being a brainless consumer, seeking likes on instagram. Pointless.

You want to travel, do it in college, study abroad, and if you pursue an MBA, go ahead and take those trips with classmates. But these white collar women age 25 to 35 who think traveling is a personality or a substitute for a husband and kids are lost.

Well, maybe fore you. For many of us, it's a way to learn languages, build an international network, visit the Louvre and the Sistine Chapel, learn how to make sushi in Japan, cycle around Taiwan on innovative electric bamboo bikes, dance samba in Brazil with some of the most talented musicians on the planet, see India's Hyderabad transform itself into a global cyber hub from dust, and learn how to turn on every type of shower handle imaginable. Among other things.

And no, I didn't post any of that on Facebook or Instagram.

Unless you’re in the state department, you’re spinning yarn. A “network” of random hookups and passport stamps you think are social currency. When everyone your age is talking about their tween kids and you’re talking about trips, you look ridiculous. Sorry, just being frank.

Idk but if I’m at a party I would rather hear about their experiences trekking in Kyrgyzstan than about Larla’s band recital.

Sure sure. And everyone just loves the "cool" wine aunt (actually, they all secretly feel sorry for her).

I mean it varies. Some people find “epic” travel stories to be pretentious, other people think incessant taking about one’s kids to be boring. And I love my cool triathlete aunt who is childless (not be choice, sadly) who raises German Shepherds. My hunch is that more than one mommy in the hypothetical group appreciates the escapism of the Kyrgyzstan trekking stories as a break from all the Larlo, Larla, Larleigh extracurricular one-upsmanship.

I LOVE my childless friends. I love them for themselves, but also deeply appreciate how much they have to give because they aren’t burdened by their own kids. They sustained me through the difficult early parenthood years when they could visit with ease. I love my mom friends too, but my “wine aunt” friends are gold. Anyway women’s value is not defined by their status as wives and mothers, in case that needs to be said.

I am a dog lover who raises large dogs, kids (with tons of extra curricular activities, lol), had a career and loads of adventurous travel prior to SAHM with the kids. I guess I’ve had it all, just not at the same time. The trade-off in my case was having kids late (late 30s and 40s). Was lucky with fertility, needed no assistance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thinking they have all the time in the world to work on the personal life piece: home and family. No, you don't. Time moves very, very quickly. Society loves to lie to you every day.

+1000. You will wake up one day and be 30 and will wonder what the hell happened.