Downward social mobility - anyone worries about it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you give to your DC's the best education in the world and they still can't succeed, an inheritance isn't going to make any difference (unless you have Elon Musk money).

Hmm... but being born into relative wealth and connections has been shown to be a major contributor to retaining class status (class in this context meaning same income bracket and general social circle). If you sense your kid isn't making those connections themselves, then you certainly can step in and try to help them. This is what families have been doing for ever.

One of my kids as an asocial form of high-functioning autism. He's smart, but cannot make small talk or network to save his life. I'm not quite sure where he's going to end up, but I certainly hope our money will keep him from poverty.

I don’t think a lot of you understand that young people don’t necessarily want their parents lifestyle, income level, and especially social circle. You should be hoping they make connections that suit them, not someone striving to be in a social circle like mom’s (this sounds horribly depressing).

DP. I just want a job and a family for my sons. I don’t care about any sort of social mobility. If they were plumbers I’d be happy.
One of my sons is like PP’s. The only thing he is good at is math…what jobs will there be for him? My father was similar and was able to make a great living in IT and attract my mom even with no social skills. My worst fear is for him to end up jobless and in a Tyler Robinson situation.
I am doing everything I can to help him socially but it’s such a battle.
10 years ago I was so proud of his math skills and sure that he’d be able to make a good career.

[Anonymous]

The entire structure of society is in decline. AI is hyper accelerating that. I think we have figured out the fermi paradox!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you give to your DC's the best education in the world and they still can't succeed, an inheritance isn't going to make any difference (unless you have Elon Musk money).

Hmm... but being born into relative wealth and connections has been shown to be a major contributor to retaining class status (class in this context meaning same income bracket and general social circle). If you sense your kid isn't making those connections themselves, then you certainly can step in and try to help them. This is what families have been doing for ever.

One of my kids as an asocial form of high-functioning autism. He's smart, but cannot make small talk or network to save his life. I'm not quite sure where he's going to end up, but I certainly hope our money will keep him from poverty.

I don’t think a lot of you understand that young people don’t necessarily want their parents lifestyle, income level, and especially social circle. You should be hoping they make connections that suit them, not someone striving to be in a social circle like mom’s (this sounds horribly depressing).

DP. I just want a job and a family for my sons. I don’t care about any sort of social mobility. If they were plumbers I’d be happy.
One of my sons is like PP’s. The only thing he is good at is math…what jobs will there be for him? My father was similar and was able to make a great living in IT and attract my mom even with no social skills. My worst fear is for him to end up jobless and in a Tyler Robinson situation.
I am doing everything I can to help him socially but it’s such a battle.
10 years ago I was so proud of his math skills and sure that he’d be able to make a good career.

Why do you think there won't be jobs for him? What makes you think he can't adapt his skills to whatever new jobs appear? Or better yet, make a new type of job for himself?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know nearly a dozen young people who have opted not to have kids because they feel they can’t afford them.

All of these young people grew up in nice homes with two loving parents, great schools, travel, etc. Despite having good educations and jobs, the cost of housing plus kids is just too much.

Only one of my kids is old enough to really worry about such things, and they’ve opted to not come back to the dc metro area after college because it’s too expensive.

It’s sad how people choose to avoid hard work and live selfishly. Kids are a lot of work but also a great investment and a great way to be fulfilled!

Selfish is having kids just because it’s expected. Honestly, in present day society, I probably wouldn’t have brought them into this mess. I’m not talking about AI and political discord, I’m talking about the looming climate crisis.

The looming climate crisis is overstated. We might have to adjust to different weather patterns but we aren't going to hit a runaway greenhouse effect or anything like that.

Says you against the majority of scientists who actually study the subject. Okay.

So AI can build a better planet and we can all move there. You people are worrying needlessly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you give to your DC's the best education in the world and they still can't succeed, an inheritance isn't going to make any difference (unless you have Elon Musk money).

Hmm... but being born into relative wealth and connections has been shown to be a major contributor to retaining class status (class in this context meaning same income bracket and general social circle). If you sense your kid isn't making those connections themselves, then you certainly can step in and try to help them. This is what families have been doing for ever.

One of my kids as an asocial form of high-functioning autism. He's smart, but cannot make small talk or network to save his life. I'm not quite sure where he's going to end up, but I certainly hope our money will keep him from poverty.

I don’t think a lot of you understand that young people don’t necessarily want their parents lifestyle, income level, and especially social circle. You should be hoping they make connections that suit them, not someone striving to be in a social circle like mom’s (this sounds horribly depressing).

DP. I just want a job and a family for my sons. I don’t care about any sort of social mobility. If they were plumbers I’d be happy.
One of my sons is like PP’s. The only thing he is good at is math…what jobs will there be for him? My father was similar and was able to make a great living in IT and attract my mom even with no social skills. My worst fear is for him to end up jobless and in a Tyler Robinson situation.
I am doing everything I can to help him socially but it’s such a battle.
10 years ago I was so proud of his math skills and sure that he’d be able to make a good career.

Why do you think there won't be jobs for him? What makes you think he can't adapt his skills to whatever new jobs appear? Or better yet, make a new type of job for himself?

AI is going to change society anyway. He won’t need to work, so no need to worry about this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re actively teaching our children to want less stuff. We tell them repeatedly that our house is a little too big for us. We’re pint our friends and family who are happier in smaller dwellings. We point out how much time and money it takes to maintain everything. As long as we teach them to live within their means, I think they be okay. Problems arise when people have UMC taste in a MC salary.

Why didn’t you downgrade if it’s too big? Such a role model for preaching wanting less.

Because we’re trapped in a 2% mortgage and they can walk to their best friends’ houses. We’d take a huge financial hit to move at this point. We didn’t even want a house this big originally (just over 2,900 sq ft), but it was so hard to get a house, any house, in 2020. Our dream house had 24 offers on it the first day. It was smaller. We were lucky to get anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you give to your DC's the best education in the world and they still can't succeed, an inheritance isn't going to make any difference (unless you have Elon Musk money).

Hmm... but being born into relative wealth and connections has been shown to be a major contributor to retaining class status (class in this context meaning same income bracket and general social circle). If you sense your kid isn't making those connections themselves, then you certainly can step in and try to help them. This is what families have been doing for ever.

One of my kids as an asocial form of high-functioning autism. He's smart, but cannot make small talk or network to save his life. I'm not quite sure where he's going to end up, but I certainly hope our money will keep him from poverty.

I don’t think a lot of you understand that young people don’t necessarily want their parents lifestyle, income level, and especially social circle. You should be hoping they make connections that suit them, not someone striving to be in a social circle like mom’s (this sounds horribly depressing).

DP. I just want a job and a family for my sons. I don’t care about any sort of social mobility. If they were plumbers I’d be happy.
One of my sons is like PP’s. The only thing he is good at is math…what jobs will there be for him? My father was similar and was able to make a great living in IT and attract my mom even with no social skills. My worst fear is for him to end up jobless and in a Tyler Robinson situation.
I am doing everything I can to help him socially but it’s such a battle.
10 years ago I was so proud of his math skills and sure that he’d be able to make a good career.

Why do you think there won't be jobs for him? What makes you think he can't adapt his skills to whatever new jobs appear? Or better yet, make a new type of job for himself?

AI is going to change society anyway. He won’t need to work, so no need to worry about this.

What do you think a bunch of non working men are going to do? Either commit crimes or sit in their rooms jerking it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know nearly a dozen young people who have opted not to have kids because they feel they can’t afford them.

All of these young people grew up in nice homes with two loving parents, great schools, travel, etc. Despite having good educations and jobs, the cost of housing plus kids is just too much.

Only one of my kids is old enough to really worry about such things, and they’ve opted to not come back to the dc metro area after college because it’s too expensive.

It’s sad how people choose to avoid hard work and live selfishly. Kids are a lot of work but also a great investment and a great way to be fulfilled!

Selfish is having kids just because it’s expected. Honestly, in present day society, I probably wouldn’t have brought them into this mess. I’m not talking about AI and political discord, I’m talking about the looming climate crisis.

The looming climate crisis is overstated. We might have to adjust to different weather patterns but we aren't going to hit a runaway greenhouse effect or anything like that.

Says you against the majority of scientists who actually study the subject. Okay.

So AI can build a better planet and we can all move there. You people are worrying needlessly.

...uh that's not how AI works at all!

[Anonymous]

OP, you almost had a point. You lost credibility during your Ivy League sentence and it got worse. To comment on -generally- what you suggested, yes, some people are downwardly mobile. Usually along the way choices are made and those are individual choices. It can viewed that most will be empowering choices. They strengthen self respect, improve mental health and help the individual self-actualize. More important to many than whether or not those choices are an advance monetarily.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As the college application process wraps up, I’m realizing something that’s getting harder and harder to ignore: it really seems like DC is headed for downward social mobility. I just don’t see them pursuing a career that would allow them to maintain the lifestyle they grew up with. And since they’re not getting into Ivy League schools, they won’t even have the prestige, however little it may be, that might help them hold onto whatever social status comes with it.

And then there’s the bigger picture. The spouse they end up with will probably be in the same situation, and then there are their kids and the whole family trajectory. Add in the rise of AI and the disappearance of jobs, and it’s only going to make things worse.

Maybe this isn’t something people say out loud. One of those quiet anxieties. But can we rant about it on an anonymous forum.

It's a lot of things going on at once.

Crowding out by asian immigrants.
I see a lot of bitterness from the parents whose kids didn't make the AAP cut but would have if AAP wasn't saturated with asian kids
Same when it comes to college admissions.
These parents comfort themselves by derisively calling the asians strivers and imp[lying that their parents are somehow doing a bad job.

Global competition.
More and more professional positions are moving outside the USA. USA is losing its economic moat.

Technological disruption
AI. We're all worried about AI and what it means for our kids and grandkids.
If we could figure this one out, I think a lot of people would feel a lot better.
I suspect that AI will be an overall boon to humanity but it could be the origin story for the Cylons.

What is AAP?

I don’t think it’s the immigrants. The acceptance rate gets so much lower than 20 years ago. Every kid at every corner is applying using the common app.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know nearly a dozen young people who have opted not to have kids because they feel they can’t afford them.

All of these young people grew up in nice homes with two loving parents, great schools, travel, etc. Despite having good educations and jobs, the cost of housing plus kids is just too much.

Only one of my kids is old enough to really worry about such things, and they’ve opted to not come back to the dc metro area after college because it’s too expensive.

It’s sad how people choose to avoid hard work and live selfishly. Kids are a lot of work but also a great investment and a great way to be fulfilled!

Selfish is having kids just because it’s expected. Honestly, in present day society, I probably wouldn’t have brought them into this mess. I’m not talking about AI and political discord, I’m talking about the looming climate crisis.

The looming climate crisis is overstated. We might have to adjust to different weather patterns but we aren't going to hit a runaway greenhouse effect or anything like that.

Says you against the majority of scientists who actually study the subject. Okay.

I have both heat AND air conditioning. I’ll be fine.

You think climate change only impacts if you feel hot or cold? Not like food supply, heath issues, the economy? Oy vey.

[Anonymous]

Read some history (yeah I know dcum doesn't read history) to understand empire decline. We are at the end of stage 6 entering stage 7. It's been one helluva ride.

The Age of Pioneers
The Age of Conquests
The Age of Commerce
The Age of Affluence
The Age of Intellect
The Age of Decadence
The Age of Decline & Collapse

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm laughing at this because we're Jewish and every single Jewish family has a generational path that goes:

Shift worker in a zipper factory in Yonkers ---> public school English teacher in New York ---> Chairman of the Federal Reserve ---> Barista at an indi coffee shop in Brooklyn.

Same, grandparents are professors, we're doctors, we have: a social worker, an art therapist, a dogwalker, and live-in nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you give to your DC's the best education in the world and they still can't succeed, an inheritance isn't going to make any difference (unless you have Elon Musk money).

Hmm... but being born into relative wealth and connections has been shown to be a major contributor to retaining class status (class in this context meaning same income bracket and general social circle). If you sense your kid isn't making those connections themselves, then you certainly can step in and try to help them. This is what families have been doing for ever.

One of my kids as an asocial form of high-functioning autism. He's smart, but cannot make small talk or network to save his life. I'm not quite sure where he's going to end up, but I certainly hope our money will keep him from poverty.

I don’t think a lot of you understand that young people don’t necessarily want their parents lifestyle, income level, and especially social circle. You should be hoping they make connections that suit them, not someone striving to be in a social circle like mom’s (this sounds horribly depressing).

DP. I just want a job and a family for my sons. I don’t care about any sort of social mobility. If they were plumbers I’d be happy.
One of my sons is like PP’s. The only thing he is good at is math…what jobs will there be for him? My father was similar and was able to make a great living in IT and attract my mom even with no social skills. My worst fear is for him to end up jobless and in a Tyler Robinson situation.
I am doing everything I can to help him socially but it’s such a battle.
10 years ago I was so proud of his math skills and sure that he’d be able to make a good career.

Same. My son has a really hard time speaking to people he doesn’t know. He had some low level jobs but finally found a job that works with his skills. He works for the City in one of the departments. He has his own office, he doesn’t have to deal with the public, he has a handful of coworkers. I never would have imagined but it’s a sigh of relief that he found a job that he’s comfortable with. Honestly we do have generational wealth and the grandchildren have their own funds. He’s the only one who doesn’t use it. He makes his lunch every day and uses public transportation.

Your son will find something, just support him until he does.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As the college application process wraps up, I’m realizing something that’s getting harder and harder to ignore: it really seems like DC is headed for downward social mobility. I just don’t see them pursuing a career that would allow them to maintain the lifestyle they grew up with. And since they’re not getting into Ivy League schools, they won’t even have the prestige, however little it may be, that might help them hold onto whatever social status comes with it.

And then there’s the bigger picture. The spouse they end up with will probably be in the same situation, and then there are their kids and the whole family trajectory. Add in the rise of AI and the disappearance of jobs, and it’s only going to make things worse.

Maybe this isn’t something people say out loud. One of those quiet anxieties. But can we rant about it on an anonymous forum.

It's a lot of things going on at once.

Crowding out by asian immigrants.
I see a lot of bitterness from the parents whose kids didn't make the AAP cut but would have if AAP wasn't saturated with asian kids
Same when it comes to college admissions.
These parents comfort themselves by derisively calling the asians strivers and imp[lying that their parents are somehow doing a bad job.

Global competition.
More and more professional positions are moving outside the USA. USA is losing its economic moat.

Technological disruption
AI. We're all worried about AI and what it means for our kids and grandkids.
If we could figure this one out, I think a lot of people would feel a lot better.
I suspect that AI will be an overall boon to humanity but it could be the origin story for the Cylons.

What is AAP?

I don’t think it’s the immigrants. The acceptance rate gets so much lower than 20 years ago. Every kid at every corner is applying using the common app.

Well, I guess immigrants aren't the ones driving the acceptance rate from 25% to 5% but it doesn't help that they are taking about a 30% of the slots when they are only like 5 or 6% of the population.