Thinking back as a mom, was Kate Gosselin really that bad?

[Anonymous]

I refuse to believe Jon is the biological parent of the kids. He is half Korean with green eyes.

It is plausible that if Kate and Jon had 3 or 4 kids that they could all look at least 50% Korean but statistically there is no way that all 8 look 50%+ Korean. I lived in Hawaii where there are so many intermarriages between white and Asian couples. It just doesn't happen that ALL eight kids have such strong Korean features. And yes I get Korean genes can be dominant but there is just no way. Not with how light Kate is. All you need to do is google famous people who are 25% Korean and 75% white.

And if you look at the skin tone of the kids there is no way it is the same as Jon's. His is actually lighter. The kids never got red in the sun the way Jon did.

I think this is why he is not close to his kids. I think they all realize this.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I went back and watched a few episodes a year or two ago. She was worse than I remembered. Truly a mommy dearest.

+1. Being stressed is not an excuse for verbal abuse. She was a control freak who maintained control through verbal abuse and shaming. Everyone knows someone like this. The modus operandi is to make life hell for everyone who does not do what you want. They learn that there is hell to pay so they then just go along with every demand you make. This is Kate in every episode. This is why most of her kids hate her.

Most of her kids? Seems like 6 are fine with her.

They are scared of her. She was horrible to Collin and put him in an institution and never visited. Just give him to dad. Who does that?

The kids who say Collin was violent and terrorized them. They were scared of him. If she’s so bad why didn’t they all run off to live with dad?

1) because maybe Kate and John were terrible? So the devil you know
2) why doesn’t any abuse victim “just leave?”

The kids are adults now but many still don’t have a relationship with Jon. Jon seems like he kind of sucks.

I think what you are missing is just because he sucks doesn’t mean that she wasn’t abusive and terrible. It doesn’t vindicate her at all.

It has nothing to do with vindication but if you’re going to heap insults against her, might as well add him to the mix. He was a lousy deadbeat dad yet in here it’s all “she is evil” blah blah. And “poor Jon, so glad he could finally live a little after marrying so young”. Give me a break.

He want a deadbeat. She owed him child support and stole the kids money. He did not want to be on the show.

He also didn’t care to be much of a parent. I’m sure he’s available if you think he’s that much of a catch. 8 kids and most have nothing to do with him, but hey, there’s a lid for every pot.

He at least understood how not to bark and snipe. Kate was very acerbic always. And people can blame John if they want but it was obvious John was a type B low ambition person. Having that many kids with a person like that was bound to end unhappily. Yet Kate did it because she thought she could yell her way to changing John.

I doubt the kids have tons of warm memories.

Look at how they were raised. They were constantly on display and expected to perform for the camera so mom and dad could get a paycheck. They are probably glad to be away from both parents. Also the parents do not live on their childhood home any more. A lot of times kids don't visit parents as much when there is not a home to return to.

It’s so easy not to yell when you are completely checked out acting like yet another kid. He helped make the kids, he should have stepped up but he didn’t. His adult kids don’t talk to him. That tells you all you need to know. They probably saw how much more difficult they made their mom’s life, not to mention never gave them a dime.

A woman is responsible if she meets and marries a guy who is a checked out loser and then expects him to be dynamic and assertive.

She knew what he was but she made eight kids with him and then blamed him for being exactly like he was when they married. People do not change. The person you marry will have the same character after 5 years of marriage as they did when you were dating. If people would understand this there would be a lot fewer divorces.

Do you know how babies are made? Jon certainly made a choice here. He should have gotten a vasectomy if parenthood wasn’t for him.

Is how ivf sextuplets are made common knowledge?

They didn't use IVF. They had sex.

With the help of fertility drugs, right?

Was he onboard with having 6 kids at once?

I’m just curious if he knew that was a very real possibility. Like, how involved was he in that process other than as the sperm provider.

Well, the other thing is that usually when you are involved with fertility doctors they are very clear that you will need to have a selective reduction if you have high order multiples. One presumes that at the beginning Kate and John were very christian and that's why they didn't, but they stopped being particularly involved in church fairly early on, so it's a shame they didn't reduce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Collin's book is coming out in October. Check out the cover photo.

https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/collin-gosselin/in-the-shadow-of-eight/9781538784723/

Wow, that about sums up how Kate treated Collin.

The episode where he was three and his mom snatches his bear that has a tiny piece of gum on it and says she is throwing it away. He was so distraught and Kate just keeps ranting. It was one of the older girls who begs her not to throw it away. All the kids got gum from Aunt Jodi and another kid got some on his socks. Kate didn't threaten to take something of his away. She was always so angry at Collin.

I really hope Collin makes a lot of money with this book.

I never watched the show, but it was certainly a part of the pop culture of the time. I never understood and maybe somebody can explain to me. Why did she dislike him so much? Was he spirited or was he really quiet?

[Anonymous]

I'm stunned Kate went back to nursing after all these years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm stunned Kate went back to nursing after all these years.

better than hookin

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm stunned Kate went back to nursing after all these years.

better than hookin

I think it's good she did. But it took her so long to do it. I didn't think she would.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I refuse to believe Jon is the biological parent of the kids. He is half Korean with green eyes.

It is plausible that if Kate and Jon had 3 or 4 kids that they could all look at least 50% Korean but statistically there is no way that all 8 look 50%+ Korean. I lived in Hawaii where there are so many intermarriages between white and Asian couples. It just doesn't happen that ALL eight kids have such strong Korean features. And yes I get Korean genes can be dominant but there is just no way. Not with how light Kate is. All you need to do is google famous people who are 25% Korean and 75% white.

And if you look at the skin tone of the kids there is no way it is the same as Jon's. His is actually lighter. The kids never got red in the sun the way Jon did.

I think this is why he is not close to his kids. I think they all realize this.

It has been my experience that Asian genes are very strong. They would also be 33.3% Asian, not 25%.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Collin's book is coming out in October. Check out the cover photo.

https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/collin-gosselin/in-the-shadow-of-eight/9781538784723/

Wow, that about sums up how Kate treated Collin.

The episode where he was three and his mom snatches his bear that has a tiny piece of gum on it and says she is throwing it away. He was so distraught and Kate just keeps ranting. It was one of the older girls who begs her not to throw it away. All the kids got gum from Aunt Jodi and another kid got some on his socks. Kate didn't threaten to take something of his away. She was always so angry at Collin.

I really hope Collin makes a lot of money with this book.

I won't be able to read this because it will be too triggering for me. I also grew up in a large family as the kid who could never make my very angry mom happy (also had a checked out, uninvolved dad). It is brutal.

I have extremely strong feelings about people having more kids than they can responsibly parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I refuse to believe Jon is the biological parent of the kids. He is half Korean with green eyes.

It is plausible that if Kate and Jon had 3 or 4 kids that they could all look at least 50% Korean but statistically there is no way that all 8 look 50%+ Korean. I lived in Hawaii where there are so many intermarriages between white and Asian couples. It just doesn't happen that ALL eight kids have such strong Korean features. And yes I get Korean genes can be dominant but there is just no way. Not with how light Kate is. All you need to do is google famous people who are 25% Korean and 75% white.

And if you look at the skin tone of the kids there is no way it is the same as Jon's. His is actually lighter. The kids never got red in the sun the way Jon did.

I think this is why he is not close to his kids. I think they all realize this.

It has been my experience that Asian genes are very strong. They would also be 33.3% Asian, not 25%.

No it would be 25% because only 1 of 4 grandparents would be Korean. There are no thirds.

[Anonymous]

A lot of people with abusive spouses become quite passive. They tend to try to placate the abusive partner and they often defer to them. I am not surprised Jon did that, especially given his relationship was being televised and scrutinized. Knowing the wrath of your spouse will be taken out on you and the kids (or some of them) tends to keep people submissive and top toeing on eggshells. Also abusive parents can be horrible to some kids and actually treat other kids great. They can even align themselves with a child against the other parent and other kids so I am not surprised the kids have different experiences with Kate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Collin's book is coming out in October. Check out the cover photo.

https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/collin-gosselin/in-the-shadow-of-eight/9781538784723/

Wow, that about sums up how Kate treated Collin.

The episode where he was three and his mom snatches his bear that has a tiny piece of gum on it and says she is throwing it away. He was so distraught and Kate just keeps ranting. It was one of the older girls who begs her not to throw it away. All the kids got gum from Aunt Jodi and another kid got some on his socks. Kate didn't threaten to take something of his away. She was always so angry at Collin.

I really hope Collin makes a lot of money with this book.

I never watched the show, but it was certainly a part of the pop culture of the time. I never understood and maybe somebody can explain to me. Why did she dislike him so much? Was he spirited or was he really quiet?

Colin was the scapegoat in a profoundly dysfunctional family. The parents both have cluster b personality disorders and Jon may be an alcoholic. The twins were the golden children and the rest of the sextuplets were trying to not be cast out like Colin.