REV Soccer Only CHAT, No drama please

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like the TD and president are easily manipulated.

When a parent becomes an "expert at playing politics," they stop being a supporter and start acting like a lobbyist. This shift transforms a game meant for kids into a high-stakes social chess match where the board is the sideline and the pieces are the players.
"Playing politics" usually involves a few specific, tactics
The Whisper Campaign: Planting seeds of doubt about a coach’s strategy or another player's performance to elevate their own child's standing.
Gatekeeping: Controlling the flow of information among other parents to create an "in-crowd" and an "out-crowd."
When backroom maneuvering takes center stage, the actual team and club suffers in major ways. When playing time or positions are influenced by a parent’s relationship with the coach, TD and President, the kids notice. If a player works twice as hard but loses their spot to the "connected" kid, their drive vanishes. Trust is the currency of a team; politics devalues it. Politics are contagious. Once one parent starts "maneuvering," others feel they must do the same just to keep their child on a level playing field. This creates a "cold war" atmosphere where parents are suspicious of one another rather than cheering for the whole squad.

Ultimately, the club’s reputation takes a hit. High-quality coaches and talented players will eventually leave for "cleaner" programs where the drama is kept to a minimum. You end up with a club that isn't known for its trophies or its player development, but for its sideline drama. The kids are almost always aware of the tension. When parents play politics, they teach their children that success isn't earned through sweat and skill, but through who you know and how well you can manipulate the system.

This is exactly our experience with the girls side. My DD’s team could be so much better than they actually are. Most clubs deal with this at some level, but at VRSC it is extreme. And the team suffers because the kids that are favored are not held accountable for effort or performance; and laugh and joke around all practice because they don’t need to compete within the team. And they aren’t really that talented to begin with - just average good players.

My dd must be on your team. We experience the same.

+1. We are definitely on the same team. Girls could win a lot more if everyone was treated fairly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The fear mongering is real here. Guessing some of you haven’t been around much. What was described happens at almost every high league level Club or team. Yes, at an extreme level. Just ask anyone who was with Union during Nader’s tenure. You think those coaches just left those ways behind them when they moved to Bethesda? Before BP came to VDA, this was also a big problem. Time will tell there. Arlington was known more than anybody a few years ago for this type of thing. Love how NVA parents look away knowing what goes on there…

I do agree on one thing. Clubs that allow this kind of thing have teams that suffer from these kind of issues. But yeah, sorry, VRSC not really any different.

The best Clubs are usually the ones that do not allow parent/coach communication and have some type of Club representative as an in between. No parent manager. At the same time, even with this setup, if the coach has a bad read of players, the team will suffer anyway.

Set real expectations. I like to think happy mediums. No club around here is exceptional. Even VDA is having issues at younger age groups.

Thanks for the advice. You must be a mom that came from FCV chasing CC and ED

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The fear mongering is real here. Guessing some of you haven’t been around much. What was described happens at almost every high league level Club or team. Yes, at an extreme level. Just ask anyone who was with Union during Nader’s tenure. You think those coaches just left those ways behind them when they moved to Bethesda? Before BP came to VDA, this was also a big problem. Time will tell there. Arlington was known more than anybody a few years ago for this type of thing. Love how NVA parents look away knowing what goes on there…

I do agree on one thing. Clubs that allow this kind of thing have teams that suffer from these kind of issues. But yeah, sorry, VRSC not really any different.

The best Clubs are usually the ones that do not allow parent/coach communication and have some type of Club representative as an in between. No parent manager. At the same time, even with this setup, if the coach has a bad read of players, the team will suffer anyway.

Set real expectations. I like to think happy mediums. No club around here is exceptional. Even VDA is having issues at younger age groups.

Thanks for the advice. You must be a mom that came from FCV chasing CC and ED

No. You just put your own ego aside and let you DC play for and with the people they want to play with. Keep quiet, don’t get involved with the bantar. If DC is a good player, you don’t need politics or favors.

Only time to think differently is if OTHERS tell you your DC is one of the best players in the area. Then maybe you take DC to the current hot club getting USYNT looks. That is extremely few and far between.

[Anonymous]

Nobody really chased cc or ed. Most were on the fence and didn’t have many good options. It became clear that Adam was lying and most of what he put forward was a big show.

Ed and cc were the devil we knew. Several of the parents organized as many to stay together as possible but the teams were still decimated.

BP took what he could with him.

Almost everyone is disappointed with what’s happening, even now. Ed is a huge disappointment and so is cc.

The combination of favoritism…playing not great players the entire game with widely expiramental new adds continues to weaken all teams.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is clear that VRSC now favors its boys program and is following other clubs in discriminating against the girls program.

Regarding the boys' program, there are rumors circulating within the boys' program, suggesting that players whose parents are closely connected to the Technical Director and President receive "special access." This privileged treatment reportedly includes advantages like additional training with older teams, guest player opportunities, and approval to play in older age groups. Furthermore, it is rumored that these close relationships facilitate direct, unregulated communication, potentially allowing parents to sway significant decisions impacting the team or the club as a whole.

Same within the girls' program. Moms text coaches directly, asking to play them on different positions or complaining that their daughter didn't play the whole game. It is sad.

Don’t normalize harmful behavior, don’t deflect with whataboutism, and don’t make excuses.
What about a scale? Instead of lumping everything together.
From worst to excellent. No fear mongering. Have you heard of retaliation?
When forums stay constructive, they become valuable spaces for sharing information some of it, helpful.

[Anonymous]

As a parent I don’t know about the soccer but in terms of how the business is managed.

There are warning signs, Multiple re-organizations. Several coach changes for the same team. Offers before full complete coaching slates.Practice and games with substitute coaches. Coaches missing on the website.Multiple late room block emails. Focus only on top teams. Emails that always point out how great everything is.Overuse of buzz words such as “development”, “program”, “pathways”,”strong” ,”compete”,“last chance. Lack of promoting from within of coaches and players
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