Age not to take boy into restaurant ladies bathroom

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be strange. I think the woman's room is all stalls so I don't care what age the child is if a Mom is bring a son into the bathroom. It is not like we are going to the bathroom with open doors. The child is not going to be watching me do my business. My 7 year old won't go in the woman's room and he is able to go to the bathroom in the men's room solo so I let him. We do have an occasional reminder of what to do if he is uncomfortable or worried about someones behavior.

We do use the family restroom in situations that I am not comfortable, like a bathroom with multiple exits.

Most bathrooms that I've been in, the stall doors do not completely cover the entrance of the stall. There is a wide space on either side of the door, and it's definitely possible to see someone on the other side if you are intently looking.

And so what if a 4 year old boy sees you peeing?! Or a 6 year old boy?

Do you expose yourself in front of males you don't know?
I certainly don't want to.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would also like to point out to all the nosy Nellies that sometimes you can't be sure the gender of the child. My 8-year old daughter has short hair and is often called a boy. I see her get looks when we go into the bathroom. MYOB everyone!

+1

Yep. My ds has long hair and is assumed to be a girl by waiters.

+2, my son gets called a girl because of the long hair all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I stopped around age 8 if it was a place like a restaurant with multiple exits, Penn station, an airport etc. I really don't care about looks from other moms. No way I'd allow a 4 year old into a mens room alone.

I would never let my 8 year old into a bathroom a penn station alone! I have a 9 year old, and it’s case by case.

The Penn Station men's room at a normal hour is really crowded, bustling with a mix of people. A 9 year old would be fine. Figuring out how the motion-activated water faucet works is the biggest issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be strange. I think the woman's room is all stalls so I don't care what age the child is if a Mom is bring a son into the bathroom. It is not like we are going to the bathroom with open doors. The child is not going to be watching me do my business. My 7 year old won't go in the woman's room and he is able to go to the bathroom in the men's room solo so I let him. We do have an occasional reminder of what to do if he is uncomfortable or worried about someones behavior.

We do use the family restroom in situations that I am not comfortable, like a bathroom with multiple exits.

Most bathrooms that I've been in, the stall doors do not completely cover the entrance of the stall. There is a wide space on either side of the door, and it's definitely possible to see someone on the other side if you are intently looking.

And so what if a 4 year old boy sees you peeing?! Or a 6 year old boy?

Do you expose yourself in front of males you don't know?
I certainly don't want to.

I say this with complete sincerity: if you consider a four or six year old boy as being a “male” then you need therapy. And as a mom of four and six year old boys, I promise they’re not interested in your body or your bathroom habits.

If you truly think that all four and six year old boys are "female", I think you are the one in need of therapy.

Stop being obtuse. The PP was using the word "male" as a way to sexualize them, grouping them in with all the 'other males' like horny teenage boys and disgusting old perverted men who want to leer at her. It's sick to put little kids into that category.

And to answer the PP who asked what I call them, the answer is that they're "little kids" and they're in a category all on their own together with the little girls and the babies who have zero interest in your genitalia.

Exactly. Little kids can pretty much be considered sexless when it comes to what restroom they're using. My DH takes our 3 year old DD into the men's room if he has to when out and about with her.

Which of these makes more sense?

1)Sexually aware grown man in ladies room potentially making females uncomfortable

2) Innocent sexually unaware little girl in men's room making no one uncomfortable


The second choice by far.

[Anonymous]

This thread is really eye opening. I would say above age 5 is getting weird for a boy to be in the ladies room (obviously exceptions made for special needs or sketchy places like train stations). Then again I’m not a parent. But 9 year old going in with mommy sounds very helicopter parenty, especially at a place like a family friendly restaurant...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be strange. I think the woman's room is all stalls so I don't care what age the child is if a Mom is bring a son into the bathroom. It is not like we are going to the bathroom with open doors. The child is not going to be watching me do my business. My 7 year old won't go in the woman's room and he is able to go to the bathroom in the men's room solo so I let him. We do have an occasional reminder of what to do if he is uncomfortable or worried about someones behavior.

We do use the family restroom in situations that I am not comfortable, like a bathroom with multiple exits.

Most bathrooms that I've been in, the stall doors do not completely cover the entrance of the stall. There is a wide space on either side of the door, and it's definitely possible to see someone on the other side if you are intently looking.

And so what if a 4 year old boy sees you peeing?! Or a 6 year old boy?

Do you expose yourself in front of males you don't know?
I certainly don't want to.

I say this with complete sincerity: if you consider a four or six year old boy as being a “male” then you need therapy. And as a mom of four and six year old boys, I promise they’re not interested in your body or your bathroom habits.

If you truly think that all four and six year old boys are "female", I think you are the one in need of therapy.

Stop being obtuse. The PP was using the word "male" as a way to sexualize them, grouping them in with all the 'other males' like horny teenage boys and disgusting old perverted men who want to leer at her. It's sick to put little kids into that category.

And to answer the PP who asked what I call them, the answer is that they're "little kids" and they're in a category all on their own together with the little girls and the babies who have zero interest in your genitalia.

I am that PP.

I have 4 sons and I don't consider them to be (or ever have been) "horny" "disgusting" or "perverted." Regardless, after a certain age they did NOT belong in the women's restroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe there are people who take non-disabled 8 year old boys into women’s bathrooms.

I can't believe the people who care.

This. I’m taking my 8 year old into the women’s bathroom with me and I DGAF who stares at me.

[Anonymous]

By 5 or 6, he was using the men's room. Maybe not at a busy train station but at most typical bathrooms in restaurants and malls and public places. He is a boy, he knows he is a boy - I find it weird their are posters who consider their kids genderless and sexless because they are children. My boys are males and they use male restrooms.

I find it weird when I see an older boy in the women's locker rooms or bathrooms but I realize it isn't the kids fault. They have weird parents. Just like the 'my kids are kids - they aren't male or female, they have no sex or gender' posters on here. Weird people out there. The kid can't choose or control their weird parents so I as an adult can go somewhere else or ask the child to turn around if they are gawking at me (yes, I did that at a swimming pool locker room when a boy who looked 8-10 was staring at me changing). If I see any kid, male ore female peering through the cracks in the door, I will ask them to move. I had one kid (about 4-5) crawl under the stall once in a public bathroom. I told him that was rude and to leave immediately and that we don't watch people go to the bathroom.

Kids don't choose their parents. I educate where I can if there is a situation involving me so at least the kids have heard another perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be strange. I think the woman's room is all stalls so I don't care what age the child is if a Mom is bring a son into the bathroom. It is not like we are going to the bathroom with open doors. The child is not going to be watching me do my business. My 7 year old won't go in the woman's room and he is able to go to the bathroom in the men's room solo so I let him. We do have an occasional reminder of what to do if he is uncomfortable or worried about someones behavior.

We do use the family restroom in situations that I am not comfortable, like a bathroom with multiple exits.

Most bathrooms that I've been in, the stall doors do not completely cover the entrance of the stall. There is a wide space on either side of the door, and it's definitely possible to see someone on the other side if you are intently looking.

And so what if a 4 year old boy sees you peeing?! Or a 6 year old boy?

Do you expose yourself in front of males you don't know?
I certainly don't want to.

I say this with complete sincerity: if you consider a four or six year old boy as being a “male” then you need therapy. And as a mom of four and six year old boys, I promise they’re not interested in your body or your bathroom habits.

If you truly think that all four and six year old boys are "female", I think you are the one in need of therapy.

Stop being obtuse. The PP was using the word "male" as a way to sexualize them, grouping them in with all the 'other males' like horny teenage boys and disgusting old perverted men who want to leer at her. It's sick to put little kids into that category.

And to answer the PP who asked what I call them, the answer is that they're "little kids" and they're in a category all on their own together with the little girls and the babies who have zero interest in your genitalia.

Exactly. Little kids can pretty much be considered sexless when it comes to what restroom they're using. My DH takes our 3 year old DD into the men's room if he has to when out and about with her.

Which of these makes more sense?

1)Sexually aware grown man in ladies room potentially making females uncomfortable

2) Innocent sexually unaware little girl in men's room making no one uncomfortable


The second choice by far.

Actually I have read on threads like these about adult males being uncomfortable because they were using a urinal when a little girl was brought in to the bathroom. Unfortunately there aren't easy answers. Your dh is doing the right thing, I am just saying that it is a stretch to say that most likely someone may be uncomfortable sometime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be strange. I think the woman's room is all stalls so I don't care what age the child is if a Mom is bring a son into the bathroom. It is not like we are going to the bathroom with open doors. The child is not going to be watching me do my business. My 7 year old won't go in the woman's room and he is able to go to the bathroom in the men's room solo so I let him. We do have an occasional reminder of what to do if he is uncomfortable or worried about someones behavior.

We do use the family restroom in situations that I am not comfortable, like a bathroom with multiple exits.

Most bathrooms that I've been in, the stall doors do not completely cover the entrance of the stall. There is a wide space on either side of the door, and it's definitely possible to see someone on the other side if you are intently looking.

And so what if a 4 year old boy sees you peeing?! Or a 6 year old boy?

Do you expose yourself in front of males you don't know?
I certainly don't want to.

I say this with complete sincerity: if you consider a four or six year old boy as being a “male” then you need therapy. And as a mom of four and six year old boys, I promise they’re not interested in your body or your bathroom habits.

If you truly think that all four and six year old boys are "female", I think you are the one in need of therapy.

Stop being obtuse. The PP was using the word "male" as a way to sexualize them, grouping them in with all the 'other males' like horny teenage boys and disgusting old perverted men who want to leer at her. It's sick to put little kids into that category.

And to answer the PP who asked what I call them, the answer is that they're "little kids" and they're in a category all on their own together with the little girls and the babies who have zero interest in your genitalia.

Exactly. Little kids can pretty much be considered sexless when it comes to what restroom they're using. My DH takes our 3 year old DD into the men's room if he has to when out and about with her.

Which of these makes more sense?

1)Sexually aware grown man in ladies room potentially making females uncomfortable

2) Innocent sexually unaware little girl in men's room making no one uncomfortable


The second choice by far.

Actually I have read on threads like these about adult males being uncomfortable because they were using a urinal when a little girl was brought in to the bathroom. Unfortunately there aren't easy answers. Your dh is doing the right thing, I am just saying that it is a stretch to say that most likely someone may be uncomfortable sometime.

sorry stretch to say that no one is uncomfortable

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I stopped around age 8 if it was a place like a restaurant with multiple exits, Penn station, an airport etc. I really don't care about looks from other moms. No way I'd allow a 4 year old into a mens room alone.

I would never let my 8 year old into a bathroom a penn station alone! I have a 9 year old, and it’s case by case.

The Penn Station men's room at a normal hour is really crowded, bustling with a mix of people. A 9 year old would be fine. Figuring out how the motion-activated water faucet works is the biggest issue.

The problem is the assuming that other people would stand up for a kid getting attacked. Fewer and fewer people are willing to confront situations like that now. Sadly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is really eye opening. I would say above age 5 is getting weird for a boy to be in the ladies room (obviously exceptions made for special needs or sketchy places like train stations). Then again I’m not a parent. But 9 year old going in with mommy sounds very helicopter parenty, especially at a place like a family friendly restaurant...

I probably said all kinds of things before I became a parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I stopped around age 8 if it was a place like a restaurant with multiple exits, Penn station, an airport etc. I really don't care about looks from other moms. No way I'd allow a 4 year old into a mens room alone.

I would never let my 8 year old into a bathroom a penn station alone! I have a 9 year old, and it’s case by case.

The Penn Station men's room at a normal hour is really crowded, bustling with a mix of people. A 9 year old would be fine. Figuring out how the motion-activated water faucet works is the biggest issue.

I wouldn't do that in a million years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A mom, with a young girl about 4-5 years old, gave me a look at a restaurant ladies bathroom when I entered with my 4 year old boy. That mom gave me a look again when we exited the bathroom again. That made me uncomfortable. When should I stop bringing my boy into ladies bathroom? And, what is the minimum age that you would feel comfortable for your boy to go into men bathroom by himself? He still sits to potty. And one more question, when should I stop saying going to potty? Is potty this word too childish?

You should stop. 4 is too old. And boys should pee standing up, if that's what you mean by potty as a verb.

But why? Honestly, some public toilets are a little tall for my 4 year old.... he'd just be peeing on the side of it!!!

[Anonymous]

A few reasons why:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADF1YlYyiSA

https://www.news4jax.com/news/2015/08/22/man-arrested-in-mcdonalds-bathroom-assault-2/

https://komonews.com/news/local/young-boy-sexually-assaulted-in-restaurant-bathroom

https://www.foxnews.com/us/sex-offender-who-tried-to-infect-kids-with-hiv-accused-in-attack-on-oregon-boy

https://www.jacksonville.com/article/20150821/NEWS/801251611