If you live in NOVA and send your kids to private why?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:My question is what do middle class families do in this area public is declining but private even with aid is unaffordable so what do they do?

Parents need to make more money. Work harder or find a higher paying job.

Great. Given that, I hope you know that your kid will no longer have teachers, you'll no longer have anyone to come collect your trash, there will no longer be lawn service staff or housecleaners for you to hire unless those people are all childless. Because low paying jobs have no value, amiright?

You can be unreasonable if you want. This was actually good advice.

DP. It barely even qualified as advice. Just a lazy comment.

Nope, it was good advice. If parents want to raise kids, don't complain about the expenses. Put on your big boy pants and work harder or find a higher paying job. Otherwise, just accept you cannot afford the life you want. This is how life works. Stop asking other people to pay for you.

No one was complaining, nor were they “asking other people to pay” for them. You apparently see things that aren’t there. Maybe raise it with your doctor. Along with a referral to anger management.

Read the prior posts again. Your reading comprehension is what warrants a visit to the doctor.

I read them. Asking what a middle class family should do when publics are bad and privates are unaffordable—which is what the “advice was responding to—is not asking other people to pay, nor were any of the comments that followed. So you can add reading comprehension to your growing list.

It mentioned “private even with aid is unaffordable.” Financial aid is funded by donations to private schools, usually by families of students and alumni. Applying for financial aid is asking other people to pay for your kid, and accepting financial aid is allowing other people to pay. What part of this are you not understanding?

Ohhhh I get it, you’re that same weird, angry person that flips out anytime anyone here mentions financial aid. Never mind then.

P.S. Asking what middle class families are supposed to do when publics are in decline and “private even with aid is unaffordable” is not the same as asking people to pay for you. But I know FA triggers you, so you won’t get it.

You sound paranoid and unhealthy.

[Anonymous]

Godspeed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:My question is what do middle class families do in this area public is declining but private even with aid is unaffordable so what do they do?

Who do you think posts all those questions about "How Catholic do you have to be to go to a parish school?"

And it’s still north of 1k per month!

Exactly! That’s what I’m saying middle class families have no options!

They could always demand better with their vote.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My question is what do middle class families do in this area public is declining but private even with aid is unaffordable so what do they do?

MOVE

[Anonymous]

Simple.

We can.

Fairfax schools have fallen of the past 10-20 years

Class sizes too big in public.

Failure of Public schools during COVID.

DEI and having to deal with the school board.

Transgender students in bathrooms.

Fights, assaults on campus. Very little discipline.

And I can go on and on…

[Anonymous]

My DC developed massive anxiety in her FCPS class of 29 (!) first graders. Lots of disruptive behavior. We went private as a result. And I'm a product of FCPS from the same area. It is not the same anymore. At all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My question is what do middle class families do in this area public is declining but private even with aid is unaffordable so what do they do?

MOVE

Yeah. To where? All the good pyramids are prohibitively expensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My question is what do middle class families do in this area public is declining but private even with aid is unaffordable so what do they do?

MOVE

Yeah. To where? All the good pyramids are prohibitively expensive.

We moved to the Midwest. The public schools are meh even though everyone here thinks they are amazing. The kids can’t read!

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I think you guys underestimate how hard it is to go private in a hcol area most people have to tough it out in a public school I know i did and my kid might too.

Huh? Can you explain what you mean by "hard"?
- one of the private school families in a hcol area

I mean have you seen the price of homes lately🤣🤣🤣

To some of us, public schools are like public housing. Either pay for it yourself or get an inferior mess.

The point is that it can be difficult for people to pay for private school when many bought homes in good neighborhoods, usually planning to send kid to public. It’s not fair for all the rich people to pull their kids out of the system.

We bought in an excellent district. I don’t believe in sequestering rich kids away to private, so we send our kid to public even though we could comfortably afford private. We stuck it out for several years, supplemented at home, did outside math, respectfully raised concerns about curriculum and classroom behavior, and I volunteered countless hours helping to run PTA events including big fundraisers to help teachers (They don’t need it, district is rich.), STEM and science nights. I finally just gave up and we are switching this year.

Public education is a very, very different animal from when I was growing up. I went to a crappy poor school in a town where lots of girls get pregnant or do drugs and drop out. I learned to read at school. I was given advanced spelling lists and also allowed to read after completing math work. Everyone learned to spell, read, and write. Problem kids were sent to the principal, and parents yelled and sometimes spanked their kids. Schools now cannot dole out consequences and neither do parents. Teachers are stuck teaching to the bottom, and the rest of the kids are stuck on screens and ignored.

At what age did you switch?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:All these things you can find in good public school districts.

Most public school parents are ignorant about how bad public school education is because they have no point of comparison, especially those who are Millennials and Gen Z.

The best school district in VA is Falls Church. At the high school level, it is no match for Sidwell, NCS/STA, GDS, or Potomac.

I read this thread because I send child to one of these schools from Nova. My experience with my neighborhood cohort from is: they are just as educated — if not more so — than the private school set. This is because those schools place a huge emphasis on financial aid so there are many UMC kids. Not true in my neighborhood. Things change when you are talking about the local really great public HS which feeds from several neighborhoods. But the idea that my neighbors are stupid is ignorant. They are oft times hug believers in public schools. Nova is a big place.

Who places a huge emphasis on financial aid?
At most of the schools you listed above, 75% to 80%+ of families pay the total cost (tuition, plus fees). Walking the walk is much harder than talking the talk.

At Sidwell, 1 in 4 students in the US is on financial aid. 25%. That is MUCH higher than my local neighborhood elementary school bounded geographically by housing that costs $2M+. Sidwell US is WAY more economically diverse than most economically segregated neighborhoods.

That means 75% of US families pay full tuition at Sidwell. All of the families I know who receive FA at Sidwell are college educated professionals with graduate degrees—without exception. The UMC “economic diversity” these families bring to Sidwell is largely coming from two fed. families, college professors, and nonprofit managers.

Please pipe down with the false narrative that schools like Sidwell are educating a broad swath of families from across the economic spectrum.

Two fed families can have an income of $550k. One kid and they don’t get FA.

And I’m at a Big3/sidwell and the economic diversity is way greater than my neighborhood ES which was the point of my post. Not pretending that Sidwell was doing gods work and educating the masses. We agree on that. Nobody and I mean a big fat zero at my loc ES in Nova are from the parts of town where some kids live at my Big3. I’m not complaining—just pointing out an inconsistency amongst a small segment of private school families.

I’m at Sidwell too and you’re really exaggerating the economic diversity at the school. Outside of *some* recruited athletes, there really aren’t many families on the low end of the economic spectrum at Sidwell. The fact remains that over 75% of families pay full tuition, and the families I know who receive FA at Sidwell have HHIs of at least $300k. Don’t confuse residential choices with income. There are families who choose to live in PG County and they pay full tuition.

P.S. You’re correct about one thing—two fed families can have a relatively high income, and they would definitely be ineligible for FA. So I retract that example.

I think we probably mostly agree. I’m not arguing that Sidwell is truly economically diverse. It’s not. It’s just that it is more diverse than a wealthy inner neighborhood suburban elementary which are geographically limited by the $2M-$3M homes in their boundary. It’s why I suspect a lot of rich minorities don’t want to send their kids to these predominately white little elementary enclaves.

We probably are mostly in agreement. However, I don’t agree that schools like Sidwell are more economically diverse than public schools in even the wealthiest DC Metro suburbs. There are no public high schools in this area that are exclusively zoned for $2M-$3M+ homes (not to mention IB townhouses and apartments). Name a neighborhood in this area and it’s zoned high school and I will find IB housing that’s under $1M. Like Sidwell, there’s an economic range at public schools in the wealthiest DC Metro neighborhoods. However, I believe the economic floor is generally lower at those wealthy public schools than a $60k/year top private.

Let’s play. I bet you don’t really know the suburbs. You just think you do. Jamestown, Taylor. Arlington. Kent Gardens, Chesterbrook, Fairfax. Go. And you have to have enough housing to support having some realistic population of school aged children so finding one house doesn’t count.

If you want to play, make sure you follow the guidelines. I said to name the neighborhood AND the zoned HIGH SCHOOL. Don’t move the goal posts. I will provide ONE Zillow/Redfin listing per zoned high school. We can safely assume that if there is one zoned house or condo under $1M, there are others in that building or on that block. I don’t work for you. I’m graciously proving a point. If you want multiple examples, do your own research.

But my entire posts were only about ES. In ES, you get more economic and racial diversity at the Sidwells of our our world. That was it. I have repeatedly said things are different in HS. Sounds like we agree…again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you guys underestimate how hard it is to go private in a hcol area most people have to tough it out in a public school I know i did and my kid might too.

Huh? Can you explain what you mean by "hard"?
- one of the private school families in a hcol area

I mean have you seen the price of homes lately🤣🤣🤣

To some of us, public schools are like public housing. Either pay for it yourself or get an inferior mess.

The point is that it can be difficult for people to pay for private school when many bought homes in good neighborhoods, usually planning to send kid to public. It’s not fair for all the rich people to pull their kids out of the system.

We bought in an excellent district. I don’t believe in sequestering rich kids away to private, so we send our kid to public even though we could comfortably afford private. We stuck it out for several years, supplemented at home, did outside math, respectfully raised concerns about curriculum and classroom behavior, and I volunteered countless hours helping to run PTA events including big fundraisers to help teachers (They don’t need it, district is rich.), STEM and science nights. I finally just gave up and we are switching this year.

Public education is a very, very different animal from when I was growing up. I went to a crappy poor school in a town where lots of girls get pregnant or do drugs and drop out. I learned to read at school. I was given advanced spelling lists and also allowed to read after completing math work. Everyone learned to spell, read, and write. Problem kids were sent to the principal, and parents yelled and sometimes spanked their kids. Schools now cannot dole out consequences and neither do parents. Teachers are stuck teaching to the bottom, and the rest of the kids are stuck on screens and ignored.

At what age did you switch?

9 (3rd->4th)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:All these things you can find in good public school districts.

Most public school parents are ignorant about how bad public school education is because they have no point of comparison, especially those who are Millennials and Gen Z.

The best school district in VA is Falls Church. At the high school level, it is no match for Sidwell, NCS/STA, GDS, or Potomac.

I read this thread because I send child to one of these schools from Nova. My experience with my neighborhood cohort from is: they are just as educated — if not more so — than the private school set. This is because those schools place a huge emphasis on financial aid so there are many UMC kids. Not true in my neighborhood. Things change when you are talking about the local really great public HS which feeds from several neighborhoods. But the idea that my neighbors are stupid is ignorant. They are oft times hug believers in public schools. Nova is a big place.

Who places a huge emphasis on financial aid?
At most of the schools you listed above, 75% to 80%+ of families pay the total cost (tuition, plus fees). Walking the walk is much harder than talking the talk.

At Sidwell, 1 in 4 students in the US is on financial aid. 25%. That is MUCH higher than my local neighborhood elementary school bounded geographically by housing that costs $2M+. Sidwell US is WAY more economically diverse than most economically segregated neighborhoods.

That means 75% of US families pay full tuition at Sidwell. All of the families I know who receive FA at Sidwell are college educated professionals with graduate degrees—without exception. The UMC “economic diversity” these families bring to Sidwell is largely coming from two fed. families, college professors, and nonprofit managers.

Please pipe down with the false narrative that schools like Sidwell are educating a broad swath of families from across the economic spectrum.

Two fed families can have an income of $550k. One kid and they don’t get FA.

And I’m at a Big3/sidwell and the economic diversity is way greater than my neighborhood ES which was the point of my post. Not pretending that Sidwell was doing gods work and educating the masses. We agree on that. Nobody and I mean a big fat zero at my loc ES in Nova are from the parts of town where some kids live at my Big3. I’m not complaining—just pointing out an inconsistency amongst a small segment of private school families.

I’m at Sidwell too and you’re really exaggerating the economic diversity at the school. Outside of *some* recruited athletes, there really aren’t many families on the low end of the economic spectrum at Sidwell. The fact remains that over 75% of families pay full tuition, and the families I know who receive FA at Sidwell have HHIs of at least $300k. Don’t confuse residential choices with income. There are families who choose to live in PG County and they pay full tuition.

P.S. You’re correct about one thing—two fed families can have a relatively high income, and they would definitely be ineligible for FA. So I retract that example.

I think we probably mostly agree. I’m not arguing that Sidwell is truly economically diverse. It’s not. It’s just that it is more diverse than a wealthy inner neighborhood suburban elementary which are geographically limited by the $2M-$3M homes in their boundary. It’s why I suspect a lot of rich minorities don’t want to send their kids to these predominately white little elementary enclaves.

We probably are mostly in agreement. However, I don’t agree that schools like Sidwell are more economically diverse than public schools in even the wealthiest DC Metro suburbs. There are no public high schools in this area that are exclusively zoned for $2M-$3M+ homes (not to mention IB townhouses and apartments). Name a neighborhood in this area and it’s zoned high school and I will find IB housing that’s under $1M. Like Sidwell, there’s an economic range at public schools in the wealthiest DC Metro neighborhoods. However, I believe the economic floor is generally lower at those wealthy public schools than a $60k/year top private.

Let’s play. I bet you don’t really know the suburbs. You just think you do. Jamestown, Taylor. Arlington. Kent Gardens, Chesterbrook, Fairfax. Go. And you have to have enough housing to support having some realistic population of school aged children so finding one house doesn’t count.

If you want to play, make sure you follow the guidelines. I said to name the neighborhood AND the zoned HIGH SCHOOL. Don’t move the goal posts. I will provide ONE Zillow/Redfin listing per zoned high school. We can safely assume that if there is one zoned house or condo under $1M, there are others in that building or on that block. I don’t work for you. I’m graciously proving a point. If you want multiple examples, do your own research.

But my entire posts were only about ES. In ES, you get more economic and racial diversity at the Sidwells of our our world. That was it. I have repeatedly said things are different in HS. Sounds like we agree…again.

You **may** have said ES, but I have always said HS. What sense does it make to compare the SES of Sidwell families on TWO different campuses (that come from as far away as Baltimore and Woodbridge) to the tiny boundary around a suburban public elementary school? I’m being generous in my willingness to compare the SES of Sidwell’s entire student body to the much smaller boundary around any public high school in NoVa. Don’t be unreasonable. We agree because you looked up those IB HS housing prices and you know I’m correct.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All these things you can find in good public school districts.

Most public school parents are ignorant about how bad public school education is because they have no point of comparison, especially those who are Millennials and Gen Z.

The best school district in VA is Falls Church. At the high school level, it is no match for Sidwell, NCS/STA, GDS, or Potomac.

I read this thread because I send child to one of these schools from Nova. My experience with my neighborhood cohort from is: they are just as educated — if not more so — than the private school set. This is because those schools place a huge emphasis on financial aid so there are many UMC kids. Not true in my neighborhood. Things change when you are talking about the local really great public HS which feeds from several neighborhoods. But the idea that my neighbors are stupid is ignorant. They are oft times hug believers in public schools. Nova is a big place.

Who places a huge emphasis on financial aid?
At most of the schools you listed above, 75% to 80%+ of families pay the total cost (tuition, plus fees). Walking the walk is much harder than talking the talk.

At Sidwell, 1 in 4 students in the US is on financial aid. 25%. That is MUCH higher than my local neighborhood elementary school bounded geographically by housing that costs $2M+. Sidwell US is WAY more economically diverse than most economically segregated neighborhoods.

That means 75% of US families pay full tuition at Sidwell. All of the families I know who receive FA at Sidwell are college educated professionals with graduate degrees—without exception. The UMC “economic diversity” these families bring to Sidwell is largely coming from two fed. families, college professors, and nonprofit managers.

Please pipe down with the false narrative that schools like Sidwell are educating a broad swath of families from across the economic spectrum.

Two fed families can have an income of $550k. One kid and they don’t get FA.

And I’m at a Big3/sidwell and the economic diversity is way greater than my neighborhood ES which was the point of my post. Not pretending that Sidwell was doing gods work and educating the masses. We agree on that. Nobody and I mean a big fat zero at my loc ES in Nova are from the parts of town where some kids live at my Big3. I’m not complaining—just pointing out an inconsistency amongst a small segment of private school families.

I’m at Sidwell too and you’re really exaggerating the economic diversity at the school. Outside of *some* recruited athletes, there really aren’t many families on the low end of the economic spectrum at Sidwell. The fact remains that over 75% of families pay full tuition, and the families I know who receive FA at Sidwell have HHIs of at least $300k. Don’t confuse residential choices with income. There are families who choose to live in PG County and they pay full tuition.

P.S. You’re correct about one thing—two fed families can have a relatively high income, and they would definitely be ineligible for FA. So I retract that example.

I think we probably mostly agree. I’m not arguing that Sidwell is truly economically diverse. It’s not. It’s just that it is more diverse than a wealthy inner neighborhood suburban elementary which are geographically limited by the $2M-$3M homes in their boundary. It’s why I suspect a lot of rich minorities don’t want to send their kids to these predominately white little elementary enclaves.

We probably are mostly in agreement. However, I don’t agree that schools like Sidwell are more economically diverse than public schools in even the wealthiest DC Metro suburbs. There are no public high schools in this area that are exclusively zoned for $2M-$3M+ homes (not to mention IB townhouses and apartments). Name a neighborhood in this area and it’s zoned high school and I will find IB housing that’s under $1M. Like Sidwell, there’s an economic range at public schools in the wealthiest DC Metro neighborhoods. However, I believe the economic floor is generally lower at those wealthy public schools than a $60k/year top private.

Let’s play. I bet you don’t really know the suburbs. You just think you do. Jamestown, Taylor. Arlington. Kent Gardens, Chesterbrook, Fairfax. Go. And you have to have enough housing to support having some realistic population of school aged children so finding one house doesn’t count.

If you want to play, make sure you follow the guidelines. I said to name the neighborhood AND the zoned HIGH SCHOOL. Don’t move the goal posts. I will provide ONE Zillow/Redfin listing per zoned high school. We can safely assume that if there is one zoned house or condo under $1M, there are others in that building or on that block. I don’t work for you. I’m graciously proving a point. If you want multiple examples, do your own research.

But my entire posts were only about ES. In ES, you get more economic and racial diversity at the Sidwells of our our world. That was it. I have repeatedly said things are different in HS. Sounds like we agree…again.

You **may** have said ES, but I have always said HS. What sense does it make to compare the SES of Sidwell families on TWO different campuses (that come from as far away as Baltimore and Woodbridge) to the tiny boundary around a suburban public elementary school? I’m being generous in my willingness to compare the SES of Sidwell’s entire student body to the much smaller boundary around any public high school in NoVa. Don’t be unreasonable. We agree because you looked up those IB HS housing prices and you know I’m correct.

Confused by your anger lady. I’m in Nova so why I would need to lookup the IB HS housing prices near me? If you want average SES of a HS, of course it’s higher at the Sidwells of DC than even the richest local public high schools. What are you even talking about?

My point is (again, in case you missed it): my ES experience was that it got more racially and economically diverse when my kid went to a private Sidwell-like school from my public Nova ES. Seems fairly noncontroversial after all of our back and forth. But surprising to some people nonetheless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because DH likes the idea of sending our child to catholic school, as he went to a Jesuit school himself. We got a spot at ATS - the only reasons I’m not too annoyed about giving it up are the uncertainty around aftercare, the many days I understand APS has early release, and the closer distance to our home.

ATS isn’t as great as it used to be. Now that it’s racist to group kids by ability, teachers use iPads to babysit the advanced students while they spend most of their time with the struggling learners.

It’s better than most of the south Arlington schools but about the same as many in north Arlington.

The best slice of government cheese is… still government cheese.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Class sizes, discipline, just overall preference — I’ve always wondered.

Writing. My step kids attended Yorktown HS and hardly ever had graded writing assignments 9th - 12th.

This is very teacher specific. My son learned to write well at a Catholic elementary but when he arrived at Arlington public middle school (Swanson), his English grades dropped as his teachers really nitpicked everything he wrote, as they should. Same situation now at Yorktown. He scored lower than I'd expect even when I proofed or reviewed his assignments (and I consider myself a good writer).

Interesting. There was an APS group on Facebook that had Yorktown teachers — using their real names on their real profiles — saying that they have too many students to give meaningful feedback on papers.

5 min grading x 1000000 students… I get it.