13yr old's pediatrician just told her she is overweight and I am pissed

[Anonymous]

Your daughter is overweight! Don't you want to hear the truth from a professional? She brought it up so you can help her. She's only 13 and 151 lbs. That's a lot. Some grown women don't get to 151 lbs. What is she eating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Overweight" is not a judgment on your child. It's a clearly defined medical diagnosis. That definition is based on BMI.

You can be "overweight" because you are a highly muscular athlete, or because you are carrying extra fat, or even for other reasons. But "overweight" does not necessarily mean unhealthy. If you treat it that way, you are part of the problem.

- American Academy of Pediatrics Issues Its First Comprehensive Guideline on Evaluating, Treating Children and Adolescents With Obesity
- https://www.aap.org/en/news-room/news-releases/aap/2022/american-academy-of-pediatrics-issues-its-first-comprehensive-guideline-on-evaluating-treating-children-and-adolescents-with-obesity

Well BMI is not for athletes or those with real amount of muscle and the judgement that comes from hearing overweight as a teenage girl are life-altering. So stop using flawed metrics and then making judgements and treatment. Refer for a DEXA if you are really that concerned.

BMI is for athletes. It just doesn't mean what you think it means.

Okay well when one person has a BMI of 25 and is 5'5 at 150 with 120 lbs of muscle (20% BF active, etc) bvs 90lbs of muscle (40% bf) there is a difference. And yet that number (BMI) is somehow used as reasoning for X,Y, Z.

A 13 year old is different than a person who is in their 20s or 40s. A 13 year old's weight will likely only go up. OP's DD is already disadvantaged.

As a formerly heavy teen and now slim adult, this just isn’t always the case. And teaching a teen girl to desperately avoid putting fat in her body, when that’s exactly what puberty wants to happen, is just asking for an eating disorder. (Spent 10 years a bulimic myself.) Some girls need time to grow into themselves. Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t help them make good decisions about food and exercise, but focusing on pounds only is not helpful.

[Anonymous]

I feel for you, OP. My DD is 12 and has what I call a “strong” body. She was born with thicker, muscular legs and a belly. She competitively swims and plays basketball year round for both, is very active, but despite that and good eating habits, her body type is her body type.

She started noticing that she was larger overall at a young age, and I continue to tell her that she has a lot of peers who would gladly change bodies with her if it would allow them to do what she does athletically. Still, it is very hard for her to accept. She’s also short, which doesn’t help.

I show her pictures of Serena Williams. I’m sure her BMI is in the “obese” category, but I think we can all agree that she is an amazing athlete with a strong body.

[Anonymous]

Just want to note that the Diet & Exercise forum on this site is filled with some complete nut jobs who are likely chiming in here.

[Anonymous]

I think you are misplacing anger. I’m sorry. Your daughter is overweight. I’m sure she already knows this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just want to note that the Diet & Exercise forum on this site is filled with some complete nut jobs who are likely chiming in here.

+1

This is like ground zero for adult women with severe mental illnesses related to food and diet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Doctor seems kind of stupid. I would switch because I would never trust judgment going forward.

A doctor caring for her patient isn't stupid. A mother denying what her eyes see, though?

The doctor is an idiot and uninformed. Time to switch.

[Anonymous]

Uninformed about whackadoodle non-medical interpretations of and fixations on words, yes.

Informed about the American Academy of Pediatrics guidelines and updates? Also yes.

[Anonymous]

Kids bodies change so much. At the beginning of 9th grade I was 158 lbs and by the end of 9th I weighed I was two inches taller and weighed 118. I started dance but other than that, no major conscious changes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Uninformed about whackadoodle non-medical interpretations of and fixations on words, yes.

Informed about the American Academy of Pediatrics guidelines and updates? Also yes.

Uninformed about current best practices recommended by pediatric doctors who specialize in childhood weight, eating disorders, and obesity. And doesn’t understand the AAP guidelines.

[Anonymous]

I’m confused is she 5 foot and 2 1/2 inches or 5 foot 5 1/2 inches?

150 at 5 ft 2 is high for a 13 year old teen

Not sure if that’s a super high BMI for 5”5-5”6.

[Anonymous]

I'm technically in the overweight category and my doctor has NEVER said anything about it except to say "weight is a social construct" when I complained about gaining on Lexapro. It is absolutely clinically and ethically the wrong thing to do to throw that out at a teen girl. If the goal is to eat healthier and do more exercise, discuss that. But talking ONLY about BMI to a teen girl without giving her any tools or other context is MUCH more likely to make her gain weight or get an eating disorder, than anything else.

[Anonymous]

The rule is you should weight 100 lbs at 5 ft. And then add 5 lbs for every inch. At 5’5, your daughter should be about 125. She is 151. You do the math.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The rule is you should weight 100 lbs at 5 ft. And then add 5 lbs for every inch. At 5’5, your daughter should be about 125. She is 151. You do the math.

That's not the rule twiggy

Stop giving out bad advice and go lift a weight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At my daughter's well visit and during that time she talked to her about physical activity etc...

My daughter does cross fit in winter, volleyball in Fall, and travel softball year round. She definitely has an athletic body. She wears a size 6 in jeans and a small or medium in shirts/pants. She is 5 ft 5.25 inches height and was 151lbs with her clothes and sneakers on.

This pediatrician talked to her about being in the overweight category in the BMI and I almost lost my $hit. My jaw dropped. She looks nothing overweight. She has muscular legs and arms (she is a softball pitcher) and no belly gut. She isn't a twig but man, I was thrown they would talk like this to a girl teen. When we left, I told my daughter to not listen to her and she is strong and beautiful and muscle weights more than fat and not to worry at all. But I know this made her start overthinking. I could see it.

Is this normal? Really thinking of moving doctors.

Omg I am the OP. Sorry, she is 5 ft and 5.25 inches. I changed it

You mean 5'5"? That's very different from 5.25

Still...150 lbs is overweight at 5’5” for a grown woman. But is especially for a 13 yr old.