PreK teacher recommending redshirting my son

[Anonymous]

It doesn't sound like there is any reason at all to hold your kid back. My son has a November birthday so the redshirting discussion never came up for us but he is also smallish-average sized for his age at around the 45-50 percentile for height/weight. I do not think your kid's size at age 4 is a reason to hold him back. Then again, I'm a summer bday kid who went on time and I think redshirting a spring bday kid who has no special needs or learning disorders is totally ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

You say he has been a little slow to catch on to things. I would assume this pre k teacher has seen hundreds of kids in pre k. Her experience about the norms for children is valuable, given it can be a hard thing for a parent to hear.
I had this same conversation with my childs prek teacher and it wasnt particularly helpful at the time as in she didnt provide many concrete reasons to wait. However, we decided to wait and it was the right decision. My child ended up being dyslexic which is not something that is easily recognized/ diagnosed very early. Just consider her thoughts and everything may not be easily recognizable right now but may be in the future. Also, try to continue the conversation with her after you've had time to process and digest for a bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You say he has been a little slow to catch on to things. I would assume this pre k teacher has seen hundreds of kids in pre k. Her experience about the norms for children is valuable, given it can be a hard thing for a parent to hear.
I had this same conversation with my childs prek teacher and it wasnt particularly helpful at the time as in she didnt provide many concrete reasons to wait. However, we decided to wait and it was the right decision. My child ended up being dyslexic which is not something that is easily recognized/ diagnosed very early. Just consider her thoughts and everything may not be easily recognizable right now but may be in the future. Also, try to continue the conversation with her after you've had time to process and digest for a bit.

Is this true, OP? How long has his pre-k teacher been teaching pre-k? Has she always worked at the same school? Has she taught a wide range of 4-5 year olds?

I'm skeptical of her analysis because everything you said made it seem like your kid is very average/typical and will do just fine starting K next year. You don't mention any reasons to hold your kid back so it makes it seem like the teacher is wrong in her analysis of your kid. But if she's a very experienced teacher who has worked w/ lots of kids this age, I'd trust her opinion more and try to figure out why she's making that recommendation. If her only reason is because your son has a "baby voice" press her more on exactly why this concerns her or is a big enough issue for her that she would recommend he be held back because of it.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I actually think having a child go off to college at 19 is a benefit not a negative.

It's gross to have an adult man in high school with 13 year olds.

There will always be some adult men in high school even without redshirting - not everyone stays 17 senior year.

Turning 18 second semester is WAY different than being 19, and you know it.

OP’s child would turn 18 when they are a junior and would turn 19 as a senior…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:With all the army recruiters roaming the high school - no thank you. I'd rather he be 17

Army and Marines are the easiest branches to get into which is why they target the less smart 19 year olds.

Military recruiting doesn’t worry me at all.

LOL, it should.

It really doesn’t.
-Military family member

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I actually think having a child go off to college at 19 is a benefit not a negative.

It's gross to have an adult man in high school with 13 year olds.

There will always be some adult men in high school even without redshirting - not everyone stays 17 senior year.

Turning 18 second semester is WAY different than being 19, and you know it.

Kids are turning 18 as early as September. Why do people keep posting this BS about kids not being 18 unless they are redshirted? Read the thread and stop puking up the same incorrect talking points.

If it happens, it's because parents are inappropriately holding them back. None of my friends turned 18 until at least April of senior year.

You are...not good at math. The cut off is September so therefore any kids born between September-December will be turning 18 fall semester of senior year of high school. They are not held back/redshirted. They are sent on time and their birthday falls after the cut off but in the first semester of the school year. All your point proves is that you had friends whose birthdays happened to be in spring-summer instead of fall-winter.

Probably the same poster who kept insisting OP’s child was already five.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You say he has been a little slow to catch on to things. I would assume this pre k teacher has seen hundreds of kids in pre k. Her experience about the norms for children is valuable, given it can be a hard thing for a parent to hear.
I had this same conversation with my childs prek teacher and it wasnt particularly helpful at the time as in she didnt provide many concrete reasons to wait. However, we decided to wait and it was the right decision. My child ended up being dyslexic which is not something that is easily recognized/ diagnosed very early. Just consider her thoughts and everything may not be easily recognizable right now but may be in the future. Also, try to continue the conversation with her after you've had time to process and digest for a bit.

You could recognize your child struggling to read, especially at age 5 and get them a tutor or work with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually think having a child go off to college at 19 is a benefit not a negative.

It's gross to have an adult man in high school with 13 year olds.

There will always be some adult men in high school even without redshirting - not everyone stays 17 senior year.

Turning 18 second semester is WAY different than being 19, and you know it.

OP’s child would turn 18 when they are a junior and would turn 19 as a senior…

In mid May so a few weeks before school lets out. Not 19 all year long like some seem to be freaking out about. He will be 18 most of the year like many others. I don't see how "way different" 18 is than 19 at that point.

[Anonymous]

With all of this excessive red shirting, people are forgetting that statistically *some* of these kids are going to have to repeat a grade. The US average is 7%, about 3 million kids are held back each year. So with the red shirting trend, the future is going to have a whole bunch of 20 year old HS seniors. Crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You say he has been a little slow to catch on to things. I would assume this pre k teacher has seen hundreds of kids in pre k. Her experience about the norms for children is valuable, given it can be a hard thing for a parent to hear.
I had this same conversation with my childs prek teacher and it wasnt particularly helpful at the time as in she didnt provide many concrete reasons to wait. However, we decided to wait and it was the right decision. My child ended up being dyslexic which is not something that is easily recognized/ diagnosed very early. Just consider her thoughts and everything may not be easily recognizable right now but may be in the future. Also, try to continue the conversation with her after you've had time to process and digest for a bit.

You could recognize your child struggling to read, especially at age 5 and get them a tutor or work with them.

You're so right, I should have recognized my pre k ( 4 yr old0 was going to struggle to read because obv thats a real expectation for pre k. I should have set her up with 3 day a week tutoring right. Or wait, your next comment is that I didn't read to her enough. I've heard all this nonsense before.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually think having a child go off to college at 19 is a benefit not a negative.

It's gross to have an adult man in high school with 13 year olds.

There will always be some adult men in high school even without redshirting - not everyone stays 17 senior year.

Turning 18 second semester is WAY different than being 19, and you know it.

Kids are turning 18 as early as September. Why do people keep posting this BS about kids not being 18 unless they are redshirted? Read the thread and stop puking up the same incorrect talking points.

There are seniors turning 18 anywhere from sept-June of their senior yr. This is how school works

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You say he has been a little slow to catch on to things. I would assume this pre k teacher has seen hundreds of kids in pre k. Her experience about the norms for children is valuable, given it can be a hard thing for a parent to hear.
I had this same conversation with my childs prek teacher and it wasnt particularly helpful at the time as in she didnt provide many concrete reasons to wait. However, we decided to wait and it was the right decision. My child ended up being dyslexic which is not something that is easily recognized/ diagnosed very early. Just consider her thoughts and everything may not be easily recognizable right now but may be in the future. Also, try to continue the conversation with her after you've had time to process and digest for a bit.

You could recognize your child struggling to read, especially at age 5 and get them a tutor or work with them.

You think it’s actually developmentally appropriate for children to have to to read by age 5?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I currently a preschool teacher, taught kindergarten for 20 years before making the move. I tend to err on the side of giving kids with summer birthdays the extra year of preschool.

Why?

- August birthday child who excelled academically

DP. They've changed school since we were kids, made it more stressful and less enjoyable. They also have greater EF expectations earlier and expect kids to be self-sufficient without teaching them how.

We didn't redshirt our August boy and academically he's doing fine - but am extra year of maturity would have benefitted him significantly.

Stop expecting so little of your child. If he's doing fine, he's doing fine, and no one wants your 18 year old man in school with their 17 year old daughter.

My daughter will be 18 all senior year because of her Sept birthday. It's normal to be 18 all year. Stop spewing this nonsense that it's not. If a cutoff is 9/1 or 9/30 what do you think happens to kids who happen to be the oldest? It's by design.

It's literally not normal. People like you have made it common, but common is not normal.

Yes, it is normal. The age cutoff is Sept 1 nearly everywhere. The Sept-Dec kids will be 18 most of their senior year and that is normal

It is not normal. I just had my third kid graduate high school. The large majority of kids turn 18 just before graduation.

Ok, so you are old. Maybe the cut off used to be Nov 1 when your adult kids were small. The cutoff is Sept 1 now and has been for many years. Many schools literally will not enroll your child in K if they are not 5 by Sept 1. Can you not understand this?

PP is a troll trolling the elementary school forum about her dinosaur school that has some out of date cut off and is insulting everyone with a different experience with different rules that are common now. What kind of person does this? That person should just admit they were wrong and move along

Right? Her kids are adults. Why is she even commenting on the elementary school forum? Go away! No one cares about your outdated opinions

[Anonymous]

I didn't read the thread and don't know if OP is still checking, but I will weigh in anyway. I'm a former Elementary school teacher (and I taught K for one year), and a mom.

Don't, under any circumstances, listen to that pre-K teacher, OP. Pre-K teachers have no idea what they are talking about. They have no relevant training, no relevant experience, and no position from which to offer such potentially harmful advice. If your son were very young or had some serious behavior issues, then you might consider researching it, but from you say she's just talking out of her ***. Not the first time.

If you want a well-informed opinion, see if your local ES principal will speak with you about it. Some of them are pretty worthless, but many will be happy to speak with you and give you a real expert opinion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With all of this excessive red shirting, people are forgetting that statistically *some* of these kids are going to have to repeat a grade. The US average is 7%, about 3 million kids are held back each year. So with the red shirting trend, the future is going to have a whole bunch of 20 year old HS seniors. Crazy.

No, because the criteria for holding a kid back (which has been trending downward for quite a long time now, as research shows it doesn't work) is based partly on age. A child being old for the grade would, in any decent school, make them ineligible for retention.