Are people in the DC area just a different kind of rude?

[Anonymous]

People in dc and close in areas are oddly rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The whole no eye contact or acknowledgement when passing by people on the sidewalk drives me crazy.

This is not my experience at all in DC, but then most of my neighbors are longtime residents who have been here at least a couple generations. We acknowledge each other and say hi, even if we don't know each other. It's one of my favorite things about DC.

But the transplants, not so much.

+1

+1 Transplants give off an insecure vibe overall
Maybe because they went to really top schools but because the nature of the industries in the area, their incomes are not as high as there Pierce in New York or San Francisco. Also the cost of living is super high here. Just so much insecurity and graceless

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely. So many “liberal” elitists.

Agree. Also extremely miserable.

[Anonymous]

Not my experience at all. I moved here 26 years ago. You are what you attract, just saying….

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People in dc and close in areas are oddly rude.

+1

Yeah - like "I'm pretending not to acknowledge you/look down my nose at you because I'm an insecure jackass" rude. ie: trying to deflect their insecurity - SO obvious and petty. Some people refer to that weird behavior as "snifflier than thou".

People with actual manners and accomplishments are friendly and nice, in general. I have no time for the poseurs who have something to hide.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not my experience at all. I moved here 26 years ago. You are what you attract, just saying….

OP didn't mention attracting anyone - just noticing a certain kind of person. Ahem.

[Anonymous]

Move to a Black neighborhood, OP. Much friendlier. You'll see the difference right away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The whole no eye contact or acknowledgement when passing by people on the sidewalk drives me crazy.

This is not my experience at all in DC, but then most of my neighbors are longtime residents who have been here at least a couple generations. We acknowledge each other and say hi, even if we don't know each other. It's one of my favorite things about DC.

But the transplants, not so much.

+1

+1 Transplants give off an insecure vibe overall
Maybe because they went to really top schools but because the nature of the industries in the area, their incomes are not as high as there Pierce in New York or San Francisco. Also the cost of living is super high here. Just so much insecurity and graceless

Really? I feel like the locals are insecure about people being from other metropolitan areas. You see people pile it on here all the time, even on these boards.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Move to a Black neighborhood, OP. Much friendlier. You'll see the difference right away.

+1

That is true, actually - people are civil.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Here we go again.

I came here from Paris, I've lived in many countries, and believe me, people are really nice here.

It all depends to whom you're comparing people to. I'm sure there are friendlier places, of course. But as capital areas go, hmmm... not so much.

Love this reply! Merci Paris!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Here we go again.

I came here from Paris, I've lived in many countries, and believe me, people are really nice here.

It all depends to whom you're comparing people to. I'm sure there are friendlier places, of course. But as capital areas go, hmmm... not so much.

Love this reply! Merci Paris!

DP here. Yeah, Paris is great, but I found this part of the post actually LOL funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People in dc and close in areas are oddly rude.

+1

Yeah - like "I'm pretending not to acknowledge you/look down my nose at you because I'm an insecure jackass" rude. ie: trying to deflect their insecurity - SO obvious and petty. Some people refer to that weird behavior as "snifflier than thou".

People with actual manners and accomplishments are friendly and nice, in general. I have no time for the poseurs who have something to hide.

Where do you see this? When I walk in Arlington people say hi all the time unless you are in Clarendon, where you pass so many people you would be waving nonstop like a wind up toy. Same with DC. It’s just too busy to be waving hi. In Texas, where like there are maybe 3 pedestrians per city, sure they say hi to each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The whole no eye contact or acknowledgement when passing by people on the sidewalk drives me crazy.

This is not my experience at all in DC, but then most of my neighbors are longtime residents who have been here at least a couple generations. We acknowledge each other and say hi, even if we don't know each other. It's one of my favorite things about DC.

But the transplants, not so much.

+1

+1 Transplants give off an insecure vibe overall
Maybe because they went to really top schools but because the nature of the industries in the area, their incomes are not as high as there Pierce in New York or San Francisco. Also the cost of living is super high here. Just so much insecurity and graceless

Yup. I'm a transplant but didn't go to a "top" school and just have a regular, pays-the-bills job. I feel like I am super friendly and I like that this seems to get a good response in DC. I have been here 15 years and I always make friends with my neighbors, my bus drivers, the old guys who hang out on the corners near my house, the folks at the coffee shop, bartenders, managers at our favorite restaurants... I feel like DC has a really small town vibe in the right ways. I've WFH for a while (well before Covid) and we've talked about moving out of DC because the cost of living is high. But I think I'd get really lonely in the suburbs. There's just a real community feel to where I live and even though I don't have an office or real coworkers, I feel like I belong somewhere and am part of something.

But my DH went to an Ivy League college and we are still friends with some of his friends from school and their families. Individually I think they are great people and I get along with them well, but I definitely feel like there is a real underlying insecurity and class consciousness when we spend time with these folks (mostly consultants and finance people, my DH works in government). They talk about money a lot, like A LOT. And lots of class indicators -- if you talk about going on vacation they want to know if you stayed at the Four Seasons. If you mention a friend who is a lawyer, they want to know which firm and have they heard of it. That kind of thing. Just a real focus on status. Most of their kids go to private school or are at charters and they will go to private for MS or HS. It sometimes doesn't really feel like they live in DC. They travel a lot and there's a weird remove there, like they aren't really present and invested in the city. It's hard to describe.

Anyway, I think that's who OP is talking about. And I agree with PP that its an insecurity thing, and that a lot of it seems to have to do with wanting to prove they are elite or successful, and comparing themselves to people in NY or SF or London or whatever. It feels very stressful and while I like these friends, I am always a little relieved when our time with them comes to an end so that I can relax again.

[Anonymous]

Yes. So many miserable people here.

[Anonymous]

Agree with OP and I am a 27-year resident of the District of Columbia (Wards 2 & 3).

Here's a twist: I have a senior applying to colleges this fall, he was born and raised in the District. One of his very top criterion for the list of colleges is that each school must be in a location with friendlier, warmer people who are not gratuitously obnoxious. He is of here, but he cannot stand the people here.

(and before anyone points out that all teens want to get far away from parents, he perceives a real difference in two cities < 1.5 hours from here. It's the people, not the miles)