Skinny is the new moral/hard working and all other kind of superiority?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
You’re shaming other women too. You say thin women have eating disorders.

I think you have to be really mentally ill to believe the only way to be a normal weight is with an eating disorder. That’s incredibly sad.

Bla, bla, most fo have them on the other thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
You’re shaming other women too. You say thin women have eating disorders.

I think you have to be really mentally ill to believe the only way to be a normal weight is with an eating disorder. That’s incredibly sad.

Oh, no! Are you white and skinny and opposed to experiencing the same shaming you generously ladle out to those that don't look like you??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it's all about excuses, blaming someone else, I'm a victim, I have no agency in my own life and whatever happens is definitely someone else's fault.

Maybe it is about I am so superior bcs I didn't eat bread, rice, and the myriad other foods bcs I am insane.

You can eat anything you want in moderation if you are active. Most people who are overweight are not active and, especially, do not practice portion control.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, that is the only conclusion I can come to from reading the other thread. I think it is mostly women posting there. Not only is it a moral superiority, but it is also a way to claim to be a better mom, better cook, better lover, better worker, having your own canning production, your own bread-making skills, having 7 hours to shop as you have to read yogurt labels, drive to Nick's organic farm to get free-range eggs, go to every farmer's market if you have failed to have your own farm and chickens to raise and make your own jam and canned veggies and free-range livestock.

Rather than call out the food industry here for being what it is, an appalling aberration akin to a chemical plant, dcum people have chosen to blame other women and moms. It is not getting older and having hormones go haywire. It is not about having enough time to cook and serve fresh veggies. It is not about being tired and wanting ice cream and just being human. Nope, according to some on dcum, it is an utter failure at any age, and it is your own, not anybody else's, even though 2/3 of the population is overweight. It is a simple way for those to feel morally superior. If they ever admitted that it might not all be their genetics, upbringing, luck in having such choices, or having the time to research all of it, they would admit they are no better than the other in population. What do they have if they admit they are not better than the overweight ones? Nothing but luck or an eating disorder!
It never ends, mom and women shaming by other women.

Rant over. BTW, flame away judgmental "you are to blame" skinnies!

I’m thin and I don’t do any of these things. I do read food labels (it certainly doesn’t take 7 hours) and make good food choices.

Which is such a morally superior thing to do and say. Bravo for you for having to read food labels when buying bread and yogurt! Why don't you write to your congressmen and ask him to advocate for you so you don't have to read the labels of 300 yogurts?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, that is the only conclusion I can come to from reading the other thread. I think it is mostly women posting there. Not only is it a moral superiority, but it is also a way to claim to be a better mom, better cook, better lover, better worker, having your own canning production, your own bread-making skills, having 7 hours to shop as you have to read yogurt labels, drive to Nick's organic farm to get free-range eggs, go to every farmer's market if you have failed to have your own farm and chickens to raise and make your own jam and canned veggies and free-range livestock.

Rather than call out the food industry here for being what it is, an appalling aberration akin to a chemical plant, dcum people have chosen to blame other women and moms. It is not getting older and having hormones go haywire. It is not about having enough time to cook and serve fresh veggies. It is not about being tired and wanting ice cream and just being human. Nope, according to some on dcum, it is an utter failure at any age, and it is your own, not anybody else's, even though 2/3 of the population is overweight. It is a simple way for those to feel morally superior. If they ever admitted that it might not all be their genetics, upbringing, luck in having such choices, or having the time to research all of it, they would admit they are no better than the other in population. What do they have if they admit they are not better than the overweight ones? Nothing but luck or an eating disorder!
It never ends, mom and women shaming by other women.

Rant over. BTW, flame away judgmental "you are to blame" skinnies!

I’m thin and I don’t do any of these things. I do read food labels (it certainly doesn’t take 7 hours) and make good food choices.

Which is such a morally superior thing to do and say. Bravo for you for having to read food labels when buying bread and yogurt! Why don't you write to your congressmen and ask him to advocate for you so you don't have to read the labels of 300 yogurts?

Because it’s okay for people to take a few minutes to check labels to avoid added sugar etc? Because they’re not children and any reasonable person knows buying veggies is healthier than buying chips and ice cream?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it's all about excuses, blaming someone else, I'm a victim, I have no agency in my own life and whatever happens is definitely someone else's fault.

Maybe it is about I am so superior bcs I didn't eat bread, rice, and the myriad other foods bcs I am insane.

You can eat anything you want in moderation if you are active. Most people who are overweight are not active and, especially, do not practice portion control.

Lack of understanding/education about portion control in America is a huge problem.

[Anonymous]

I don’t believe in shaming anyone. But it’s a destructive myth that it’s somehow expensive to be thin. Eating half a sandwich is cheaper than eating a whole sandwich. Eating less will make you lose weight, whether you’re eating Cheetos or kale.

[Anonymous]

I've found weight loss very emotionally complicated + draining too. Can I offer some affirmations and suggestions? I have just lost 30 pounds: I am over 50, 2 kids, post menopause, full time professional job, not a millionaire, I like carbs/treats/drinks/having fun with food and friends too.

Nobody likes moral superiority in others about anything - whether it's weight loss, politics, do-gooders etc. Just say no to all moral superiority out there.

Looking back, I realize I gained weight out of stress and exhaustion after having kids. I am far from being alone in that!

Our country as whole makes it really easy for that to happen:

Demands of childraising, eldercare etc. In other cultures, there are stronger family supports out there such as in France. In other countries, people live inter-generationally where grandma can have dinner waiting after a day of work etc. My father grew up this way in a immigrant home in the US.

So much junk food/convenience food readily available - more evidence out there on how addictive it is. I walk down the street in my city and I see Dunkin Donuts, pizza slices, coffee house pastries everywhere. I walk into CVS to get a greeting card and there is junk up and down, left and right.

Looking back, I would have done some things differently:

1. Prioritize sleep - say no to nighttime TV news, social media etc and just get sleep - even if it means going to bed at 8pm. Reading a paper book before bed is classic technique.
2. Meal prep on Sunday nights for week so I'm not tempted/bombarded with all the food that I mentioned above. Do the research once on the best things to buy. I grocery shop at a mainstream grocery store - has everything.
3. Done cognitive behavioral therapy to deal with all of my negative/overwhelming thoughts about all of this.

What's working best for me right now:

WW with coach, Beck Diet book for CBT, sleep, Pegan diet, Weight Loss for Busy Physicians podcast, journaling

You can do this.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Skinny people are annoying. They punish themselves by having no ice cream and eating veggies and 24/7. They dont need us to pile on.

I hope this is just a poor attempt at humor and you don't really feel this way. It's disordered thinking to believe you have to have an eating disorder to not be fat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t believe in shaming anyone. But it’s a destructive myth that it’s somehow expensive to be thin. Eating half a sandwich is cheaper than eating a whole sandwich. Eating less will make you lose weight, whether you’re eating Cheetos or kale.

+1. DH and I used to split entrees or take away all the time. Saved money and kept us from overeating. Portion sizes are out of control here.

[Anonymous]

OP you are 100% correct.

There are studies to back up your theories. Easy to google. But of course commenters here won’t believe those studies because people don’t change their opinions when presented with facts.

This article is just a survey, not a study, but has a lot of really eye-opening stories. https://www.glamour.com/story/weight-stereotyping-the-secret-way-people-are-judging-you-based-on-your-body-glamour-june-2012

[Anonymous]

There definitely is a feeling that overweight or obese people lack willpower, self control and are not hard working. So if you extrapolate, then yes, thin people are hard working and determined. And it does take a lot of perseverance and dedication to maintain a healthy body and work out. It's easy to be fat and lazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t believe in shaming anyone. But it’s a destructive myth that it’s somehow expensive to be thin. Eating half a sandwich is cheaper than eating a whole sandwich. Eating less will make you lose weight, whether you’re eating Cheetos or kale.

+1. DH and I used to split entrees or take away all the time. Saved money and kept us from overeating. Portion sizes are out of control here.

The occasional meal out doesn't cause obesity, regardless of whether you split it. The cheapest way to eat in this country is fast food - it's cheaper than groceries. If you have $5 for a meal you are not in splitting entrees territory. If you are working shifts or a delivery job, you are not eating at a place where that's an option nor do you have refrigeration to keep the rest of your meal.

There are plenty of overweight people on DCUM who have more money than that, but it is not a "destructive myth" that it's expensive to be thin. It's a well studied fact that impoverished people are overweight because of the food options available to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t believe in shaming anyone. But it’s a destructive myth that it’s somehow expensive to be thin. Eating half a sandwich is cheaper than eating a whole sandwich. Eating less will make you lose weight, whether you’re eating Cheetos or kale.

+1. DH and I used to split entrees or take away all the time. Saved money and kept us from overeating. Portion sizes are out of control here.

The occasional meal out doesn't cause obesity, regardless of whether you split it. The cheapest way to eat in this country is fast food - it's cheaper than groceries. If you have $5 for a meal you are not in splitting entrees territory. If you are working shifts or a delivery job, you are not eating at a place where that's an option nor do you have refrigeration to keep the rest of your meal.

There are plenty of overweight people on DCUM who have more money than that, but it is not a "destructive myth" that it's expensive to be thin. It's a well studied fact that impoverished people are overweight because of the food options available to them.

It’s been studied a lot, but it’s a myth: https://news.uchicago.edu/story/food-deserts-not-blame-growing-nutrition-gap-between-rich-and-poor-study-finds

Listen, nobody likes the feeling of being hungry. But you can just as easily go to McDonald’s and just order a 6-piece nuggets for 200 calories as order a Bog Mac meal for 1000 calories. It’s just that the nuggets will not make you feel as full, and people want to feel full.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've found weight loss very emotionally complicated + draining too. Can I offer some affirmations and suggestions? I have just lost 30 pounds: I am over 50, 2 kids, post menopause, full time professional job, not a millionaire, I like carbs/treats/drinks/having fun with food and friends too.

Nobody likes moral superiority in others about anything - whether it's weight loss, politics, do-gooders etc. Just say no to all moral superiority out there.

Looking back, I realize I gained weight out of stress and exhaustion after having kids. I am far from being alone in that!

Our country as whole makes it really easy for that to happen:

Demands of childraising, eldercare etc. In other cultures, there are stronger family supports out there such as in France. In other countries, people live inter-generationally where grandma can have dinner waiting after a day of work etc. My father grew up this way in a immigrant home in the US.

So much junk food/convenience food readily available - more evidence out there on how addictive it is. I walk down the street in my city and I see Dunkin Donuts, pizza slices, coffee house pastries everywhere. I walk into CVS to get a greeting card and there is junk up and down, left and right.

Looking back, I would have done some things differently:

1. Prioritize sleep - say no to nighttime TV news, social media etc and just get sleep - even if it means going to bed at 8pm. Reading a paper book before bed is classic technique.
2. Meal prep on Sunday nights for week so I'm not tempted/bombarded with all the food that I mentioned above. Do the research once on the best things to buy. I grocery shop at a mainstream grocery store - has everything.
3. Done cognitive behavioral therapy to deal with all of my negative/overwhelming thoughts about all of this.

What's working best for me right now:

WW with coach, Beck Diet book for CBT, sleep, Pegan diet, Weight Loss for Busy Physicians podcast, journaling

You can do this.

Good luck!

Huge congrats on losing, as that was your goal! I think you do agree that it shouldn't be that hard to stay a healthy weight, nor should we be just accepting that we are bombarded with terrible food choices.