Can we talk about tipping?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like posts on tipping have gotten out of control on DCUM. Every week there’s a new one, half the people complain about tip screens, the other half call them cheap.

Restaurants don’t put much effort into training people because 1. The turnover rate is so high, it doesn’t make sense to put that much time and effort into someone who will leave in a couple months and 2. The managers were all servers who couldn’t get out of the industry, so obviously not the most motivated bunch. Managers are also all old and tired and hate their life because they’re 50 and managing immature 22 year olds at 10pm on a Saturday night when they’d rather be in bed.

I don’t tip except at restaurants, and if they say anything or give me a dirty look, I ask why their boss refuses to pay them a decent wage.

Many restaurants do put time and effort into training their staff. The turnover rate is high at poorly run restaurants but not at well run restaurants. Your attitude is clearly stereotypical and jaded and really doesn't mean much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP people who feel as you do should boycott all restaurants and other places where the tipping culture makes you feel uncomfortable. There are plenty of places to get food that do not require tips. You act as if you were not aware that tips are expected for good service. Or that you were not aware that many people's livelihood depends on tips.

As much as you might not like it, it's a fact. All the whining on DCUM in the world is not going to change that. So stop punishing people who rely on tips for their income just because you happen to disagree with it.

My daughter works in a fine dining restaurant and makes great money because she works hard and does a great job. Not every customer tips well but the ones who do more than make up for the ones who don't who are actually a small minority. Most people who frequent an establishment like that do actually get how it works.

I can see where servers in lower end restaurants ought to make more in their hourly wage because unfortunately there are a lot of cheap people like you who want others to serve them a meal but don't want to compensate them according to the present system.

Op here. I’m not sure you get my point. I don’t have a problem with wait staff getting tips. I even talked about my own experience as a waitress. My issue is that more and more employers are doing tip jars for counter service in lieu of decent wages. We should not be expected to tip someone for scooping ice cream or pouring a soda. I am also saying that decent tips for wait staff should be earned, not assumed. I got stiffed plenty of times as a waitress. Sometimes it was because people didn’t think we earned tips since we didn't take their order. Sometimes it was because the customer was just not a tipper. But it was usually because I didn’t do a great job for them. As I cleared those tables, I could usually figure out what went wrong (i.e. table full of dirty plates and empty glasses). It made me try harder and do better. Waiting tables meant constant feedback on how I was doing at my job. I learned so much from that. I hope it’s the same for your daughter.

[Anonymous]

I only tip for food delivery and on food at restaurants. Because I know those people are getting shafted by their employers.

I like coffee, so I rarely go to Starbucks etc - but don’t tip there or other places where the service they offer is standardized (ie: handing an item over a counter). I’ll pay extra for products where tipping is not part of the interaction.

Shady businesses are only part of the story. People who like tipping are part of the problem too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like posts on tipping have gotten out of control on DCUM. Every week there’s a new one, half the people complain about tip screens, the other half call them cheap.

Restaurants don’t put much effort into training people because 1. The turnover rate is so high, it doesn’t make sense to put that much time and effort into someone who will leave in a couple months and 2. The managers were all servers who couldn’t get out of the industry, so obviously not the most motivated bunch. Managers are also all old and tired and hate their life because they’re 50 and managing immature 22 year olds at 10pm on a Saturday night when they’d rather be in bed.

I don’t tip except at restaurants, and if they say anything or give me a dirty look, I ask why their boss refuses to pay them a decent wage.

Op here. My manager made over $100K per year in a small town in the 90s by working his way up from waiter. That seems pretty motivated to me. Turnover was very low too. Teenagers were fine with working behind the counter or refilling buffet for minimum wage. Those jobs were easy. Wait staff made the most money and they were either adults or teenagers who had moved up and earned it. The highest wage earners were cooks and they were adults with actual cooking skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like posts on tipping have gotten out of control on DCUM. Every week there’s a new one, half the people complain about tip screens, the other half call them cheap.

Restaurants don’t put much effort into training people because 1. The turnover rate is so high, it doesn’t make sense to put that much time and effort into someone who will leave in a couple months and 2. The managers were all servers who couldn’t get out of the industry, so obviously not the most motivated bunch. Managers are also all old and tired and hate their life because they’re 50 and managing immature 22 year olds at 10pm on a Saturday night when they’d rather be in bed.

I don’t tip except at restaurants, and if they say anything or give me a dirty look, I ask why their boss refuses to pay them a decent wage.

That’s why there’s a subject line. If you come actiss a post on a topic you don’t like or are tired of, you can just scroll right past. No need to open it, rwad it, and write a reply.

[Anonymous]

OP - I totally agree with you, and feel like some of these other posters have completely missed your point.

I ALWAYS tip to people who are paid based on the facts that they get tips (restaurants), or for a very personal service like a pedicure, haircut, tour guide, etc.

I do NOT tip for someone taking my coffee order and handing me a cup, or putting my donuts in a box for me - I'm looking at you sugar shack. I mean, I walk up to the counter, order a donut, pay for the donut, and now I'm being asked to tip the person working the cash register because they, um, gave me the item I just paid for? This is just one example of this tipping at a counter service operation I see ALL the time now. Like the OP, I find this kinda ridiculous and annoying. Not sure all these posters on here justify this practice.

[Anonymous]

One way around the screen “suggested” tipis to bring some cash with you and hand it to your salon girl.

[Anonymous]

If you’re so sure you’re in the right why do you care what is on the iPad screen? Just click on past it.

[Anonymous]

I tend to agree with you and I have a kid who is totally benefiting from tip culture this summer. She has a food service job (not server, in kitchen) that already pays amazingly well IMO ( $18 an hour ) and then they divide the tips which ends up being usually another 5 or 6 per hour. So her hourly wage ends up being something like 25-26 per hour.For a 19-year-old! Making fancy sandwiches!

[Anonymous]

How many times must we talk about tipping here?!

[Anonymous]

Most overdone topics:

1. Tipping
2. Cheating

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, what was your manager’s advice for making customers happy?

It was a ton of little things. A lot of them only apply to casual restaurants but not all of them. Some that come to mind:

Don’t constantly interrupt conversations to announce what you are doing or to constantly ask if everything is ok.

For families with small children, bring extra napkins and wet wipe.

The iced tea was hot brewed so the ice melted fast. So we brought them an extra cup of ice. People loved that.

Set the meal down so that the main entree is closest to the person.

Don’t ask if you can take their plate away. People make it obvious when they are done with their plate so that you can take it away without asking or announcing.

Refilling coffee was an art form. If they added cream or sugar, don’t refill without permission. People don’t like it when the coffee:sweetener ratio is messed up.

Bring refills and extra plates for buffet without asking. Maybe they won’t use them, but they almost always did, so not worth interrupting them to ask.

Don’t assume the woman ordered the salad.

I work in the business. Most of it sound like common sense to me. There's million more small things.

[Anonymous]

People who complain about tipping at full service restaurant and having to spend over $20, please stay home. Restaurants are not hurting for customers right now. They are hurting for workers. We have people quit left and right the moment customers order coffee all shift long in out full service restaurant.
I just went back to work and my first 2 orders were coffees. People drink coffee not because they need a 'pick me up', but it's cheap. Have your dinner or even just appetizers and we can do the coffee and dessert afterwards. Bringing coffee takes me twice and I usually work for free on coffee tables.
We had a customer who insisted that she has always been able to come for just coffee. As a worker, what you hear is: "I've always been able to come here and not spend money". The last server lost it I think. He was the hero for weeks at work. Can you imagine you have a table all set for dinner and somebody comes for coffee to "mess it up", and leaves you pennies on the table.
again, long story shot, stay home if you are not hungry or want to spend $20 at minimum. Not hurting for money, but hurting for workers. I think many made the shift to delivery and being a nanny.

[Anonymous]

I understand OP and feel similarly. Now, obviously if I choose to eat out, I'm still going to tip as that's the expectation but yes, it should be the restaurant owners paying the employees, not the patrons. Same with food delivery apps as they give crap amounts and drivers are expected to be hopeful for decent tips from customers, so of course I will give them, especially during the Pandemic. I strongly believe that if you're going to eat out or order food, tip, but I hope one day the responsibility will be on the owners to do what they should have been all along.

As far as tips on the screen when making regular transactions, I just press no tip 🤷‍♀️ and I don't blame the employees as it's not their fault the system is set up that way on the screen.

[Anonymous]

I used to tip 18-20 percent in CASH which was norm up to maybe 10-15 years ago.

So $100 tip was $20 bucks.

Tidal $100 dollar tip the restaurant keeps credit card charge and add in Medicare, SS, Federal, state etc. they $20 tip it is like a $12 tip.

Now add in waiting till next paycheck to get and hoping boss does not steal it or goes BK before you get paid.